Koi wasn’t trying to hear her talk about anything. If she wasn’t saying something along the lines of “give it to me now” he was not the least
bit interested. She got that, because part of her wasn’t either...the other part of her could still feel his heartbeat against her. It was as if it
were beating at his ribcage, ready to bust through like the fucking Koolaid man at any second. It was the drugs. She just knew it was...Oh God! What
if it killed him? What if all this…excitement was too much and it fucking killed him. Could that happen? Could he have a fucking heart
attack at 18 and leave her? Fuck no! Koi was not dying under her! If only she could get him to ease up a little…
An involuntary moan left her as he rubbed at her, his fingers poised to push her panties to the side and...No! No. She had to focus! “Babe, listen I
think-,” her words stopped short as he did just what she thought he would a finger slipping into her, then another. She sighed arching her back a
bit and pushing him deeper. Fuckkkkk...she needed to… She needed to focus, but God was her body begging her to shut up and let Koi make her
cum. Fine. Maybe she couldn’t stop him. But she could slow him down right?
She kissed him again, although she wasn’t as into it as she had been. How could she be when she could practically hear his pulse in her ears. “I
wanna go upstairs babe-,” she pouted, pulling back. Pouting was always a mood killer because it usually meant she was going to start complaining
until she got what she wanted. He knew it. And it was just what she was prepared to do if it meant Koi made it until morning...Fuck! She should have
told him at The Rex. She should have asked him not to do that shit and...she couldn’t live in the past. It was now and he was more fucked up than
she was comfortable with. Even with her head swimming in liquor, she knew he wasn’t right.
“Come on, kid, really-,” her hand reached around to his, trying to pull his fingers out of her. She just wanted him to take a minute...
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Another groan slipped through his lips, louder this time, his finger tracing her slit. Devyn moaned with him, hopefully forgetting the need to
distract him. What the fuck was more important than the massive nut she was about to bust when he finally got his dick out and-
Babe, listen I think- Nope. She didn't need to think. She needed to let Koi do what he was going to do with his fingers. And she needed to
enjoy it. That was what she needed to do...and Koi silently told her so, his finger slipping past her panties, pushing inside of her tight wetness. He
bit his bottom lip as he rubbed her from the inside...another finger joining the fun as he licked his lips. Wrapping his other arm around her waist,
he sped his fingers up, a little gasp leaving her as her back arched at his stroke. See? Thats what he was talking about. Her, relaxing and letting
him do what he'd been wanting to do to her for over a week. After all of the bullshit, all of the drama...after it all was over, this was what he
wanted. His fingers inside of her, her body enjoying him...her moans, her kisses. He wanted everything that they'd been too fucking afraid to do with
each other for days because of the bullshit that had nearly ruined them.
But Devyn had other plans, her kiss missing the intensity that it had seconds ago. Koi could tell she was thinking. She didn't have to do that. They
were in the now, no fucking thinking necessary. All she had to do was let him work.
"Just let me...fuuuuuck" He moaned in the middle of his sentence, feeling himself go hard as he was so in her wet that he barely heard what
she'd said. Damn, the wet was relentless. Her voice was serious, but he swore her pussy was talking louder. Fingers still at work, he kissed her chin,
his tongue tracing down to her neck where he started a soft suck.
Come on, kid... Groaning with annoyance, he stopped kissing her, leaning back on the staircase, his eyes on hers. The hell was up with her?
Usually when the moment hit, she went with it...no matter where. When the fuck was a bed important?
"Alright...come on." He sat up, standing as he waited for her to adjust herself and start the trek up the stairs.
He was so annoyed with her. She didn’t have to look at him to tell, but that did confirm it; his eyes fixed on hers with his eyebrows drawn together
in irritation. She didn’t care. Koi needed to take a minute to...shit, she didn’t know what he needed to do, but he had to calm down. She was
scared for him! She knew he could feel his heart racing, but it didn’t seem to be bothering him the way it was getting to her. What was bothering
him? Devyn. Devyn and her sudden need to be fucked in a bed, as if that were the only place he’d ever had her. HA!
She usually wasn’t like this. Usually, when the mood hit and the two of them got wrapped up in each other, there was no waiting. For anything. It
didn’t matter where they were or (as they’d proven tonight) who was watching. A bed never mattered before, but she cared now? Hell no. Under the
right circumstances Koi could probably get her to fuck on the front lawn, but her problem wasn’t ‘where’, it was ‘what’. And that ‘what’
was the three lines of coke he’d done a couple hours ago. She knew she was being stupid. She knew he would probably be fine, but...there was a
little voice in her head that would not stop whispering “what if he’s not…”
Koi released her, allowing her to stand before he did and waiting as she pulled her dress back down...Could he not look at her like she was
responsible for ruining this moment? She fought the urge to roll her eyes as she walked past him starting up the stairs. She just wanted him to take a
minute and catch his breath! Was that too much to ask? Koi gave a silent response to the question he hadn’t heard, his hand slapping her ass as they
ascended the final stair. Devyn couldn’t help but laugh.
She turned to face him, her feet still moving backwards as her arms fell around his neck again. Maybe she should just be straight up with him. Tell
him why she was acting the way she was about this whole thing...She could try right?
“Babe, you feeling okay?”
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
What was the fucking deal? Koi didn't erase the irritated expression from his face as Devyn passed him to lead the way up the rest of the staircase.
He just didn't get it. Shit like this was the norm when it came to Devyn and Koi. Their sex was random as fuck, getting it poppin' in crazier places
than the damn staircase in his house. And she was always down. Hell, most of the time, she was the one who started it! But tonight, she
seemed...nervous. Reserved. Like she was holding back on him. Holding back wasn't necessary. He wanted it all. He was ready for all of her, so much
energy pulsing through him that his damn skin was tingling. He knew that his high was still fresh, he could feel it in the way his skin felt flushed.
He was hot as fuck...and the best way to fix that shit? Get the fuck out of his clothes. Devyn seemed like she had other ideas as she took
her time going up the stairs. Actually...that wasn't too bad as her ass shifted with every step she took in the fitted dress she wore. Koi couldn't
help but smile as he watched it, mesmerized by that shit. The illegal type ass. Her shit was breakin' all types of laws. Because goddamn it, he just
wanted to fucking take a bit out of crime.
A laugh slipped from Devyn as Koi gave that ass a tap, the jiggle on that shit turning him on even more. Damn, she was so bodied. Her tiny waist
making her ass look colossal...in the best way. He couldn't wait to get behind that shit and...
Babe, you feeling okay? Koi was so caught up in his thoughts that he barely felt her arms fall on his shoulders, her eyes looking into his,
questioning him. Uh, yeah. Shit, he was better than fine. They'd gotten out of that party and now their bodies were getting ready to do some
reacquainting because as far as he was concerned, they'd been apart way too long.
"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" He muttered, his hands coming to her arms, his fingertips tracing the length of them.
"I'm fucking amazing, actually." He bit his lip, his hands moving from her arms to her shoulders, then to her back. Waist. Hips. Ass... He
crouched a little as he grabbed her thighs, picking her up from the floor, her body pressed against his. With a couple of steps, he was at his bedroom
door, pressing her back against the door as he stared into her eyes...giving her a second longer to get out any more questions or fucking comments she
had before they got in the room. Because once her back hit the bed, the only sounds he wanted to hear were her moans...and his fucking name. And she
could scream that shit over...and over.
"Anything else you wanna ask me before I break your back?" He asked, their faces not even inches apart. His jaw clenched as he stared at her lips,
daring them to say something else.
Devyn shuddered beneath his touch, his fingers tracing the length of her arm as he responded. Why wouldn’t I be? Why? Oh. Hmm. She didn’t
know...maybe it had something to do with the half a fucking gram he sucked into his nose a little earlier that night?! Did he really not feel like
anything was wrong with him? Fuck, his whole body was flushed, his pupils were saucers, and the heat from his body was starting to make her hot. He
couldn’t seriously not feel any of this! Why wasn’t he freaking the fuck out? She sure as hell was, but she was trying to keep that fact to
herself...Kind of. She still just wanted him to take a little breather. Maybe get a glass of water or some shit. Hydrate. Flush his system...She
didn’t fucking know! She just wanted...she wanted to stop worrying about him.
Koi wanted the same thing, his hands tracing her curves from her shoulders to her thighs before he picked her up. Devyn’s ankles crossed behind his
back and she felt her thoughts start to fog up with their closeness. Dammit, why did he always do this to her? She was trying to...focus...help
him…damn he smelled good...No! No, she needed to pull her shit together and put the kid first. Yes, she could tell in the way Koi kissed
her that he had plans to dig her shit all the way out tonight, but she couldn’t put that ahead of his health. She couldn- Anything else you
wanna ask me before I break your back?
Devyn’s lips found his before she could think about it. As if she could fucking think. Her brain shut the fuck down with that phrase, in
that tone, from those perfect lips. She whimpered a bit, her hips moving against his. She could feel him at her center, his dick begging her
to stop stalling and finally get this shit going...Why had she been talking again? She couldn’t remember...Her yelp became a soft giggle as Koi
dropped her onto the California King before sliding out of his jacket. Devyn propped herself up on her forearms and watched him, her bottom lip drawn
in, her legs open and waiting for him to come back to her. She thought about telling him to fuck her, but she was sure her face was saying that plenty
loud enough.
“Undress me-,” she purred. She didn’t want to do it herself. She wanted Koi to get her naked and she wanted him to touch every inch of
her while he did it.
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Devyn's answer was simple, her lips connecting to his quicker than it took to think of her final words. Exactly. There wasn't anything else
to say. No stalling. He'd already made plain what he wanted that night...and her trying to distract him wasn't included. The corner of Koi's lip
turned up in a cocky ass smirk, his tongue touching hers as they kissed, his hand leaving her thigh as he opened the door to his bedroom. He moaned
into her mouth as he entered the room, the warmth in her center grinding against him, the swell that had already started there going fully hard. His
hand went back to her ass, pressing her against him, Devyn's rub turning into straight fucking with their clothes on. He wanted to keep playing, the
tease that she was giving him making his heart race even faster than it already was. And that bitch was racing, the beats mixing, running
into one another. The fucking drug was a powerful thing. The excitement of the moment mixing with the blow was a fucking...powerful...thing. The
feeling of it all had him so high. Excited. Anxious for her. Impatient. He wanted her. Now.
Dropping her on the bed, he bit his lip as he took off his jacket, her laugh making him smile, full whites showing. THIS was Devyn he knew. His fun
bitch. His little bad girl. This was the girl that had just deep throated his joint while they were going ninety on the fucking freeway. The memory of
his dick hitting the back of her throat...her legs open on the bed, wearing that face that told him just how much she wanted to taste him again. His
head was going a little light at it all. And then...
Undress me... He closed his eyes, feeling the moment as he lowered himself between her legs, his hands going to her hips, resting himself on
top of her. His lips touched her neck, his tongue tasting her before he sucked at her. His hands abandoned the curve of her hips...one pulling at the
top of her dress, lowering it...her breasts exposed. He was sure he was busting seams on her dress. He didn't give a fuck. He was doing what she
asked. If her dress was in shreds by the end of the night, that wasn't his fault. He kissed a trail to the valley between her full breasts, taking her
nipple into his mouth as she wiggled underneath him, the feeling of his tongue teasing her making her restless. It was okay. He just wanted a quick
taste. The teasing wasn't going to last for long.
Especially as his hand was already between them, making its way between her legs...pushing panties to the side. Feeling her wetness slip between his
fingers as he pushed inside of her.
Oh, God it had been too long... Devyn moaned as she laid on her back and Koi kissed her neck. He knew that was her fucking spot. Her
eyes closed as her back arched beneath him. How had they gone a week without this? Why had they gone a week without this? She had missed him so much
and she was out to prove it, his name mingling with a moan of pleasure as her fingers gripped the sheets. Why wasn’t she naked yet? As if he could
hear her thoughts Koi’s hand came to the top of her dress, pulling it down to expose her chest. Fuck, yessssss. She moaned a bit louder as he began
a trail of kisses from her neck, to her collarbone, to her-, “Ahhhh-,” she sighed, his lips enveloping her nipple as his tongue rolled over it
again and again. Fuck… She squirmed beneath him, her body restless with anticipation. She wanted him inside her. Like yesterday.
Her wriggling only got worse as his fingers came back to her center continuing the stroke he’d started on the stairs. Her hips immediately began to
move in time with his fingers and she called his name again. Damn, he was making her lightheaded...but damn if it wasn’t the best she’d felt in
the last eight days. Devyn’s hands found his face, pulling his lips from her breast and back to her mouth. She didn’t want to ever stop tasting
him, their tongues twisting together, getting more and more reckless as the pace of his fingers sped up. She moaned into his mouth, her chest flush
against his and...Fuck! That’s why she had stopped this before…
Koi’s chest was almost vibrating. Shit. She cursed aloud, partly because she remembered what she was trying to tell him earlier; mostly
because Koi was dangerously close to getting her first orgasm out of the way. Her back arched again as his thumb found her clit sent electricity
through her entire body, a moan louder than any other escaping her. Mmmmm...It could wait until he rubbed this out for her right? Maybe?
Ughhh…
“Koi-,” she was interrupted, his name melding into yet another moan, her legs beginning to quiver at she got even closer to the finish line. They
needed to stop. He needed a break…right after this...
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Koi... His name never sounded better than when it was coming out of Devyn's mouth during one of their fuck sessions. She mixed every letter
with that moan that made him more and more impatient for her every time he heard it. Her hands on his face, pulling her back to his mouth silenced her
calling out for him, their kiss getting stronger...wilder, finishing what they'd started on the stairs. Their kisses were loud against the silence in
the room, lips finding each other easily in the dark. They weren't strangers to this moment, their bodies familiar old friends. His hands knew her
too, fingers slipping in and out of her, speeding up with the thrust of her hips. She was greedy as fuck tonight, her eyes closed as she let her body
ride the cum that was building. He leaned against her chest, watching her enjoy the hell out of what his hand was doing to her. He couldn't lie, he
was ready for his dick to finish the job. Watching her legs quiver...feeling her back arch...he loved that shit. And he wanted to do more. So
much more.
Quickly, he wrapped her legs around his waist with his free hand, sitting up as he lifted her onto his lap, balancing with his legs underneath him.
She straddled him, her body quickly finding the rhythm to their new position...his fingers still inside of her. He kissed her chin as her arms wrapped
around his neck, her body rolling as she moved on top of him...riding the shit out of his fingers. He groaned as he quickened their stroke,
his arm going tighter around her waist as she rocked on his hand like she was riding that dick. He leaned back as much as he could between her tight
hold on him, his eyes on her face...watching her. There was that sexy ass grimace, her teeth clenched as her body shook. Her head fell back, her long
curls falling off her shoulders as she pushed against his fingers, her hips winding in circles.
"You cummin'?" He whispered, pulling her close to him again. His nose traced the outline of her face, his lips following. He put his lips close to her
ear.
Devyn let out a surprised squeal that turned to a giggle and faded into a moan as Koi changed their position. Her arms wrapped around his neck as she
pulled her body closer to him, er hips still rolling in the unbroken rhythm they shared. Wasn’t it always like this? The two of them easily being
able to respond to the other no matter what position they were in. It was. But there was something else about tonight. Something different about Koi,
and it was distracting her. In the back of her mind, Devyn couldn’t help but imagine Koi groaning and her thinking it meant one thing when it
actually meant the exact opposite…that was her subconscious...Consciously? Devyn’s hips sped and her head fell back, his name leaving her lips
again beginning a stream of ‘fucks’ that didn’t seem like they would stop. You cummin’? Y’think?! Devyn ignored him, her roll
turning to a soft bounce as his fingers delved in and out of her. Are you?
“Shhhh-,” her index finger covered his lips as she finally felt the flood gates open, her scream drowning out anything else Koi might be try to
say to her. Fuck, that felt ah-mazing...Her whole body felt like it was on fire, her every nerve ending sensitive to the touch. His
touch. Devyn rode that feeling out, her legs feeling as if they would give out if she tried to stand. She didn’t plan on doing that though.
Koi’s fingers had slowed. Devyn reached between them, taking his fingers from her center and bringing them to her mouth. She licked the length of
them before her mouth took them in completely. She moaned as she slid them slowly out, her eyes trained on his the entire time. She smirked at him,
licking her lips before they found his again and they shared the taste of her, her tongue tangling with his in a slow kiss. Slow…
Devyn’s hands met Koi’s chest and he leaned back for her, laying down. Her lips went from his lips to his neck, her hands sliding down his chest,
over his stomach stopping to undo his belt. Her fingers twisted at the button on his pants before pulling at the zipper, her hand dipping quickly into
his boxers and grabbing what had yet to get any attention. She lifted her head, her lips finding his ear as she whispered to him.
“You turn, baby.”
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Shhhhh. Koi smiled widely at Devyn's finger over his lips, letting it silenced him, her body still moving on his fingers. Her circles stopped
and turned into a little bounce, the rhythm of her breasts catching his eye as her sex sounds got louder. She was so caught up in it...and
Koi loved it. He felt like a spectator at his own dirty show...watching Devyn put on for him, her moans like sex songs. Hitting high notes.
He let his shit talking mute out as the quivering in her legs stopped and her body stiffened against him. His fingers kept moving inside of her as he
watched her, the scream leaving her mouth making him thank God that the damn house was empty. Her hips moved slowly, grinding against his fingers, her
little jerks and cum spasms shooting through her like residual sparks from a fire refusing to be put out. He let her ride it out, her muscles
loosening, body resting against him. He kissed her forehead softly, letting her hand reach between them and hoping, on everything, that she was
getting ready to play with it and put on a little show for a nigga. But his brows furrowed as she pulled his fingers from inside of herself and...
Shit... Koi's eyes narrowed as she licked the length of the fingers that were covered in her, tasting herself. His lips rounded in an "o"
when she stuck them completely in her mouth, her eyes staring into his. Dirty mouth girl. This side of Devyn was Koi's favorite. When Devyn
got filthy. "Taste herself, 'pull my hair', beg for his dick" kind of nasty. That was the kind of shit that turned him all the way on. When the lady
that she was out in the open took a rest and his freak came out to play. She kissed him, her flavor on her lips, a groan of appreciation leaving him
as he enjoyed the taste of her on her own tongue. As if he wasn't ready before he gave her a "three finger salute" and made her bust, he was hard
enough to break fucking glass after that shit, pressing against his pants. Ready to fuck all the "tease me" fucking around and put a dent in her
shit.
And almost like she ready his mind, Devyn's hands pressed against his chest, making him lean back against his bed, his legs falling over the edge. Her
hands traveled down stomach, stopping at his belt, his eyes following her hands, mouth smirking as she pulled at his belt and undid his pants. His
hands rubbed at her thighs. He wanted to touch her again. Stop the teasing. Take his...
His own moan interrupted his thoughts as Devyn wrapped her hand around him. He felt it jump in her grasp, his eyes connecting with hers.
Your turn...
He bit his lip as he moved his hand from her thigh, covering hers. His tongue slipped between his lips as he pushed her hand down, moving it in a slow
stroke. He didn't want to talk. He didn't want to wait. No pausing. No intermissions. He wanted her to kiss the tip of his shit. Suck him into
dehydration. Then ride that bitch so hard that she strained it.
This was good. Slow. Slow was what Koi needed. Devyn hadn’t forgotten and she wasn’t going to let herself forget again. Koi’s heart was
hammering against his ribcage and Devyn and been selfishly ignoring it to get her own pleasure. He needed a break. She knew that, but she also knew if
she asked the only thing Koi would tell her he needed was a fucking nut. So what was a girl to do? How was she supposed to get him to chill and get
him off? Hell, she didn’t know, but she did know stopping wasn’t an option, his hand coming to hers and starting her stroke. Her hand worked him
as she tried to think of a way to keep him on his back and convince him to let her do most of the work. What could she--oh. Devyn knew just what to
do.
Devyn took her hand out of his pants, her lips falling atop his again, however briefly before she slid slowly to the floor...to her knees. Her fingers
tucked into the sides of his boxers and pulled them just low enough to get his length the air it was so desperately begging for. She didn’t
hesitate, her head bobbing down, taking him whole, pausing for just a second before she pulled him back out again, the sound of his dick leaving her
mouth making a sharp popping noise. Mmmm…yes. Devyn moaned, her eyes finding his again as her tongue swirled around the tip of him, before
licking from the base and back up again. And he fucking loved it… Why wouldn’t he though? He’d taught her everything she knew and Devyn
had always been a quick study.
His hand tangled in her hair pulling it back into a loose kind of ponytail. He was trying to watch...That was one of Dev’s favorite things about
Koi. He always took time to…appreciate her talents and the look on his face always made her want to show out. She spit on it before taking
him in again, finding a rhythm and moaning as he did, the sound of it egging her on...Problem solved.
What was more calming than some more than decent neck?
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Koi got it. For some reason, Devyn wanted to slow things down between them that night. He didn't understand it, but to be real, he wasn't
really trying to. Call it selfish, but that "good" pulsing through his body had him focused on something other than what kept distracting her. He only
cared about what she was doing with the other half of her attention span. The part that devoted itself to the orgasm that had her screaming loud
enough to wake the neighbors...the part that was intent on getting her next one. Or maybe...she was focused on something else, her eyes watching their
hands stroke at him. He couldn't help but watch their "team effort", the thought making him chuckle, a breathy moan taking over. It felt good, having
her touch him like she was. He liked that she wasn't only a taker. She gave too, wanting to return the favor that Koi'd just made happen between her
thighs. Yeah, that was all him. And she knew it, thanking him with her hand down his boxers. He let her hand go as she got the damn point,
his hands joining behind his head as he let her work, closing his eyes at the building sensation there.
Or not... His brow wrinkled as he felt her let go, the weight of her body leaving him as she...moved to the floor between his legs. Oh
shit. Yeah, he knew what was coming next, his arms propping him up, watching her pull at his boxers. His hips rose, helping her pull them to his
thighs...letting her uncover what she'd been feeling through his underwear. Without wasting a single fucking second, taking him into her mouth, his
thighs clenching as he felt the back of her throat on his tip. He groaned, the volume raising in his voice the way it did when she did exactly what
he'd taught her. Don't play with that shit. Let me know what you wanna do with it. Then when it gets good. And I mean really good?...tease the
fuck out of me. She followed directions when it mattered, her mouth's pull so strong on him that she made his shit a fucking cork.
"Hell yeah..." He moaned, fighting his body falling back to the bed. She was using that sick tongue game that he didn't even have to teach her and he
couldn't lie...a nigga went weak when she did that shit, his toes curling in his shoes as his eyes narrowed. Damn. He taught her well.
Cursing softly, he sat up completely, watching her head bob in his lap. His hands pulled her hair up and out of her face, her eyes looking right up at
him as she gave him that real top. The kind that got dirty. The kind that made him talk to her like the fucking dirty girl she was. The dirty girl
that spit on her nigga's dick when the spirit moved her to do it, a groan escaping him, yeah's and like that's twisted into his
moans, a curse word and a suck that shit... here and there.
"Fuck, bae..." He moaned again, his hand that twisted into her hair moving with the motion of her head. His lips rounded, hips moving with her suck.
Fuck, bae... Devyn moaned again, his pleasure giving her pleasure. Fuck, indeed. She was so fucking into him. His moans, his curses, the way
his eyes seemed to roll into the back of his skull every time his tip hit the back of her throat. Damn… Dev spread her legs a little,
slipping two fingers into herself as her suck up got even crazier, tricks Koi hadn’t taught her taking over, coming from a place she didn’t even
know existed. It was working though and she couldn’t ask for much more...neither could Koi actually...
Dev felt his body stiffen, his hands stopping her bob and holding her in place as he came in her mouth. That was...different. Usually the kid pulled
out and came on her breasts. It was his thing as far as she knew, but tonight it wasn’t. Tonight Koi was in rare form and...Devyn couldn’t say she
didn’t like it. She may not have had it happen before, but she knew her options with his kids in her mouth. Spit or swallow. It had been a questions
guys asked in the seventh grade as a dirty joke, but now it was a real decision she had to make. The thought of that almost made her laugh, but she
held it in...more like swallowed it down…
When she felt his grip on her hair lessen, Dev pulled him out of her mouth, a sigh leaving her as she got to breathe out of her mouth for the first
time in about ten minutes. She cursed, her thumb wiping the corner of her mouth and she sucked at it, putting on a little show for him...only he
wasn’t there. Devyn’s brows furrowed, noticing that Koi was now flat on his back. “Koi?” She waited for his response, sure he was about to say
some dirty shit about her riding him until the sun came up...but he didn’t. She felt her heart drop, her hand coming to the one that was still in
her hair and she moving it, coming back up to hover over him. “Koi?”
Fuck! His eyes were closed and Devyn felt panic settle in as her head immediately met his chest, her ear listening for something that had
been so prevalent before. She could barely hear it now...but he was breathing. Devyn heaved a sigh of relief and felt her lips begin to pull at the
corners. She allowed herself to laugh a little at her current situation, letting her head rest on his chest. She hadn’t killed him. But she’d put
him to sleep though?...Well, she couldn’t say that hadn’t been the goal. Devyn sighed, her hands meeting the sheets as she pushed off of the bed
coming to stand. She looked down at him and let herself have just a minute to really...look. He was so cute. And so good to her...She didn’t know
what she’d do if he...What if this was what happened to her mother. God, not the sex, but maybe she just fell asleep and the drugs...She didn’t
want to go there. She could already feel her eyes beginning to fill at the simple thought of losing him...at the actual fact that she’d lost her
mother that way. She wasn’t going to lose him. Not tonight.
Dev pulled her dress back over her breasts before she bent her leg back, pulling off one heel and then the other. She bent down again, her intentions
innocent this time as she began untying his shoes to take them off. They would get comfortable and she would let him rest. Her? She was just going to
stay up a while and make sure he was okay...just for a bit...
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
__________________________________ Another Morning After ________________________________
Koi was muttering in his sleep. He could hear his own voice forming meaningless words that didn't have a damn purpose or a reason at that
time of the morning...if it WAS morning. Shit, was it morning? He didn't know.What he DID know was that he was talking in his sleep, an effect of the
blow he'd done some time during Derrick's party last night. His mind was still worked up...restless. Good Morning, coke crash. He swallowed
hard, attempting to get some type of moisture in his throat as it was drier than the entire west coast. Also a fucking side effect of coming down
after what he guessed was a night of putting that white shit up his nose. Because it fucking ached...his nose. His sinuses felt like they were on fire
they were so dry. And his head...fuck. He felt like he'd been up for three days straight. But that couldn't have been right. The party was last
night...right?
"Shit..." He muttered, moving to throw his arm over his face, his eyes still closed against the daylight that was streaming through what may have been
his windows (was he even in his bed?). Instead, he pulled a body closer to him, his eyes snapping open quickly as the person lying next to him
tightened their arm around his waist.
Devyn. Through the headache and a half, he smiled, his eyes closing again. If there was one thing that made the night before good as fuck, it
was waking up to no regrets. He had to admit, through the fuzziness of what last night had been, he was glad it was Devyn there. Because in the blur
of things he remembered, the morning after could've ended up totally different.
Leaning into her, he placed a kiss on her forehead, feeling her jump as it woke her from her sleep.
"Morning..." He whispered, kissing her on her forehead again as she stirred and sat up.
Devyn jumped, her half sleep inturrupted for the umteenth time as she felt Koi stir. She had been asleep on and off through the morning. She didn’t
know when she finally drifted off, but she hadn’t meant to. She should have been watching him. Just in case he needed something. Just in case he
needed her. Dev had woken up for his every cough, turn, and grunt he’d made in his coke induced coma. She was worried about him and it only
got worse when she slept, having nightmares of him fucking seizing beneath her and going completely still. She couldn’t fucking deal. So yeah.
Feeling him move made her just as nervous as if had the hundred times he’d done it through the night...But he spoke this time. Telling her good
morning before his lips met her forehead again. Dev yawned, untangling her legs from his and sitting up.
“Hey…” she said quietly, blinking a few times to wake herself up. She rolled her neck, easing the tension she felt, her eyes coming to find the
clock. It was 3 in the afternoon. Shit. She hadn’t meant to stay this long. She was sure Athena was blowing up her phone...if could wait.
It wasn’t as if she could have left Koi in the state he was in. Shit wasn’t safe. It wasn’t right. It wasn’t...was she mad at him? Huh. She
didn’t know when that happened, but she was. Maybe it was because she knew he would be okay now...wouldn’t he? He was awake and smiling and his
threat of going into cardiac arrest was almost non-existent now...He was going to be fine. But she wasn’t. Especially, not if this shit happened
again.
Reaching over to the nightstand on her side, Dev picked up a bottle of water and tossed it to him. It wasn’t cold anymore seeing as she’d gotten
it sometime around six when he had his first coughing fit, but she was pretty sure it wouldn’t matter to him. She let the silence linger between
them. She didn’t know what to say to be honest. She wasn’t trying to fight with him as soon as he woke up, but she was so fucking mad at him. Why
did he do this shit to himself? How did the shit not scare the hell out of him every time he did it? It sure as hell scared her.
“How’d you sleep?” her voice was flat, the irritation clear in it despite her trying to give him some time to get his head together...Maybe she
should just go...
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Cracking the top on the bottle Devyn had just tossed to him, he took a massive swig, water dribbling down his chin as he drained half of the bottle.
He was thirsty as a thot during all-star weekend! He smirked at his thought, lowering the bottle. His smile was short lived, his eyes resting on
Devyn, who hadn't given him more than a "hey" before leaned against the wall behind his bed. His eyebrows raised as she didn't say much more, her eyes
looking as tired as she yawned again. He wanted to ask her why she was so damn exhausted looking since she'd just woken up with him. He wanted to make
a joke about their night, wondering if he'd put her to sleep after they'd fucked. But that was kind of the kicker...he didn't know if they had. They
were still in their clothes from the night before, not naked in the bed, wrapped up in the sheets like they normally were after a night together.
Which was confusing as fuck...because she obviously had mark on her neck where he'd sucked at her too hard. And the tip of his joint was tingling.
Which meant he came...hard. But, he wasn't going to mention it. Partly because of the look on Devyn's face. Something was...off about her that
morning...(afternoon...what the fuck ever).
Finally, she broke the silence, her voice telling him even more that she was less than amused about something. What? He did NOT know. What the hell
did he DO at Derrick's party. Or after it?
"I guess I slept okay..." He said, coughing a little as he ended his comment. He unscrewed the water bottle again, finishing it off as he looked over
at her, his brows furrowing even more. What was she pissed about? Because this was pissed. He wasn't sure if she was top level of pissivity or just
slightly bothered, but point was...Devyn wasn't happy.
"How did you sleep?" He asked, his hand coming up as he brushed her tousled hair out of her face. "You look like you're still tired, bae."
She knew he felt like shit. Devyn had nursed her mother through too many crashes to not know exactly what Koi was dealing with. Dry mouth, headache
(that was probably more hangover than crash symptom), fatigue...he’d been asleep for the better part of the day and she was sure as soon as she
left, he would go right back...The intense, unyielding craving for another line of blow...At least he’d slept okay. It was always a toss up with her
mom and sleep when she was on the shit. Sometimes she would sleep for days, waking only to piss and go back to bed. Other times, she wouldn’t sleep
at all, she’d lock herself in her room and just cry for hours on end...Fuck.
“Yeah, I bet you did-,” Devyn muttered under her breath, shaking her head clear. Yeah she was pissed at him. She had an attitude, and the more she
heard Koi’s voice the worse it was going to get. She was going to just leave. It wasn’t going to be good for either of them to talk right now and
she knew that...She knew that but she still answered Koi when he threw her question back at her. You still look tired, bae.
“I didn’t-,” Devyn felt her nose wrinkle as she pushed Koi’s hand away from her face, her own hand running through her hair in frustration.
She sighed, sliding to her side of the bed and sitting on the edge, her own hangover keeping her from standing like she wanted to. She didn’t want
to be near him right now though, let alone have him touch her. She spoke over her shoulder with her back to him. “I used to think she was sick…”
It was a simple truth, to begin a story Devyn had never told anyone. When she was 12 and Hilton told her mother to “get clean or get the fuck
on” she’d thought she was sick. She didn’t know any better and it seemed like her mom just had the flu...Nah. She was a junkie trying to
kick a nasty heroin habit that Dev had been too stupid to even see...
She guessed they were hashing this out now.
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Her reaction, even as pissed as he already could tell she was, wasn't expected. Koi blinked a couple of times before smirked, nodding his head. She
brushed him off. Okay, cool. No, really? Not cool. Now he knew he'd fucked up between what he hoped was still last night and this morning. The only
question was "how". What the hell had he done to Devyn that had been so bad that she was giving him more than just a cold shoulder after what he'd
figured had been an amazing night. What he wished, actually. Because he was seeing that his assumptions were a fucking joke and making a complete ass
out of him...yet again.
I didn't... She was in a bad mood because she was sleepy? Very doubtful. This was coming from somewhere else. He watched her as she scooted
away from him, her legs swinging over the side of her bed. Her back was to him as she sat. He waited for a second, wondering whether she was going to
stay...or leave. Because her body language said "leave". Shit. What...did he do? He wouldn't take her anger from her because whatever had gone down
last night, he probably deserved it. But he wasn't going to keep sitting there, taking her silence if she couldn't tell him what he'd done. What was
the issue? His eyes settling on her as his mouth opened to speak. Instead, she spoke first as she looked at him over her shoulder.
"Who-..." Koi sighed again, scratching his curls. What was she talking about. No, more like "who"? She? Her voice had been flat...hoarse.
Like the way she sounded when she was choking back tears. The gears in Koi's brain were trying so hard to keep up with her, spinning off into
different directions and running after her train of thought all at the same time. He rubbed his forehead roughly as he closed his eyes...and
then...it just...clicked.
"You're talking about your mother...aren't you?" He asked quietly. With much effort, he moved to her side of the bed, his legs swinging over the side
as he sat next to her. Not close enough to touch, just...close enough to let her know he was there. Her mother. She never spoke about her
mom. Not after she died. Not after she was buried. He guessed she was buried. The point was, some deep shit was about to leave her lips and
Koi...wanted her to know that even though she didn't want him near her, he was still there.
Who…Of course he didn’t know what she was talking about. She hadn’t used a complete thought, she just...she didn’t even know if she
wanted to talk about this shit. She just wanted him to stop putting that shit up his nose and...be okay. She didn’t want him to end up like
her...She couldn’t deal with that shit. She wouldn’t. But she also knew there would be no ‘stop doing that shit’ without some kind of
explanation, some kind of push back. Koi Kidd didn’t take orders...even if this was the only one Devyn had ever wanted to give him...So she would
have to talk about it she guessed, especially as Koi spoke again, figuring her out before she had to tell him. She heard him groan as he sat up and
slowly made his way to her side, sighing as he settled. Talk to me. Devyn scoffed sourly, shaking her head as her eyes found her feet and
she looked for the words...Talk to him...
“I was so stupid-,” she had been. You would think with who her father was, Devyn would be able to spot a junkie...Not that he ever had
been, but his client base and his many whores, you would just assume Devyn knew...And she did. She just never saw her mother that way. She was her
mom...And for the most part she was good at it. Great, even. Devyn never wanted for anything, her mom spent more than enough time with her...when she
wasn’t high. When she was high she was mostly gone and when she finally came home (at her worst she’d disappeared for about four days) she’d go
to sleep and wake up “sick”. Devyn always assumed she was sick and she never understood why her father didn’t seem to give a fuck at all. That
was until Devyn popped off at him one day and he calmly explained that she wasn’t sick. The bitch is crashing and she did that shit to
herself!
Devyn didn’t care. She’d done everything she could to make her mom’s frequent downs just a little better for her; whether she wanted her there
or not. She’d taken care of her then...and where had that gotten them? Devyn was living with her aunt trying to stay away from that shit and her mom
had finally stopped shooting up, but only because she was dead. She wasn’t doing this shit again!
“I’m not taking care of you.” She turned to him then, her eyes meeting his for the first time that afternoon. “Because if I do, you’re going
to think this shit is okay and you’re going to end up just like her. Dead.”
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
I was so stupid. Wait. How was she... He wasn't understanding her. Most of what Devyn was saying was confusing to him. Why? Because he knew
no details about her family, much less her mother. Devyn had never talked in full detail about anything from her past, but that was okay, he guessed.
When she was ready, things from her past wouldn't be secrets anymore. He understood that because he handled her the same way. So, he could only make
assumptions about her, like her family life wasn't the best and that was why she lived with her aunt. Or that she was an only child, because by now?
He was sure a sibling would've popped up. Anything outside of that? Koi drew a blank. And the confusing half sentences that she was giving him weren't
helping out much. He looked expectantly into her face, her eyes refusing to connect with him. But that wasn't new because she'd been avoiding his face
since they'd woken up next to each other. And he knew that her refusing to look at him wasn't a good sign. It was never a good sign...
I'm not taking care of you... What? Koi's eyes narrowed as Devyn finally made eye contact with him, her stare cold and nearly unforgiving.
Jesus. What the hell was she talking about?! His head cocked to the side as he listened to the rest of her words. What...had he done...LAST NIGHT?!
Something had Devyn so shook that she was comparing Koi's behavior to her mother's death? It would've been easier if he had known what had taken her
mother out. Was it...a man? Shit, no...that would've made what he now knew as still last night's activities a little homo-erotic and he knew he hadn't
gotten down like that. Cancer? Fucking AIDs? Was he on that unprotected shit again last night? Hell...did someone murder her? God, whatever he'd
gotten into the night before must've been on some foul shit if it had Devyn refusing to look at him, her eyes still brimming with tears that she was
too much of a soldier to even LET tumble over.
"I don't...did I...did I ask you to do something...wrong last night? Is that..." He stopped talking when he noticed her the change in her eyes from
cold to anger. Okay...he had to remember. He fucking had to. Recalling the night before was always a beast when he partied too hard. He was sure there
was liquor as he and Devyn had taken a couple of shots from the flask he'd bought her for her eighteenth birthday. And then after that...goddamn
it. Still drawing a blank. Chemical elevation always wiped his slate clean, making it too goddamn hard to bring anything back after...
Oh. And there it was. He'd done something last night. Shit. What had it been? Acid? A couple more percs? Maybe a line or two? He swallowed
hard, feeling the need for another bottle of water.
"What did I do last night?" His voice was low as he looked away. "Dust? Diesel? What..." He looked back at her, waiting for her to answer him.
Devyn heaved a sigh of frustration as Koi stumbled over his words, her patience non-existent. The only way she could imagine being more upset with him
was if he had actually asked her to “do something wrong” with him last night...There were very few things that genuinely pissed Devyn off about
Koi. Number one on that list of things was his drug use. She wasn’t an idiot. He used. According to Dhonny, he used a lot less than he used to,
sticking mostly to percs and green, but he was using. She guessed she just never really allowed herself to think about the shit Koi put in himself
when she wasn’t around. Why the hell would she? When she saw him he was good...himself...but last night? Seeing him? She couldn’t deal with that.
Not again.
And that’s what she was trying to tell him, although she was obviously doing a shitty job of it. The confusion on his face a permanent fixture as he
tried to make sense of her words. She didn’t think it was too much of a jump. And it probably wouldn’t have been if he had any clue what he’d
done last night. He was trying to keep up though and Dev guessed she had to appreciate his effort...She knew the struggle of trying to get back the
things blow wiped clean...He was trying...and evenually succeeding, correctly guessing she had a problem with the--diesel?
“Un-fucking-believable…-,” Devyn stood up, his presence irritating her to a point that was so beyond any point she’d ever reached
with him before. “H, too, Koi?” She didn’t really want to hear about it. She waved her question off, sighing again as she tried to get some kind
of control of herself...because who was she really mad at here? Koi was only doing the shit he usually did. He had a life before Devyn and apparently,
in it, no one told him all the shit he was on might kill him one day. He was just being himself...he didn’t have the problem. She did.
“You know what? I’m not even mad at you.” Devyn began pacing in front of him, her words not so much directed at him, but her just getting her
thoughts out. “ I’m upset with myself for not saying anything in the first place. I didn’t say anything to her either and she kept using. She
was supposed to be getting clean, but she wasn’t…” Dev paused. Her breath hitching in her throat, her emotions starting to get the best of her.
“She said she would do it for me, but...I guess...I wasn’t enough.”
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
"Dev! What?" Devyn standing so suddenly she made Koi jump, her reaction to his question throwing him for yet another loop. What was the big fucking
deal NOW? So, he apparently got high last night. That explained a HELL of a lot, actually. But one thing that he didn't get? Devyn's anger.
Why she was so MAD at him? The anger that she was showing right now had him thinking that the more he said, the pissier she'd get. Over a little
chemical elevation, though? Come on. She knew Koi. She knew this ABOUT Koi. He got high. She'd met him on an ex crash, smoked out with him on nearly
the fucking daily and watched him pop more percs than necessary. How was last night any different? Did he do a line or some shit off of Taylor
Westbrooks' (she'd been there, right?) ass? What had her so lit? An incredulous look hit his features, his hands going up as he shrugged her
overreaction.
"Hell yeah. And coke, and shrooms, and...do I need to keep going? What is the deal? What, bae!" His eyes closed as the argument that he was feeling on
the horizon sparked. Shit was about to get started and he was way too fucking hungover and cooked for this shit. He got it. Something about last night
had her pissed. He got that! But it couldn't have been this shit that she'd known about him from the jump. Shit she was completely cool with until
that day? Why?! What changed? What had her so freaked the fuck out? He'd woken up in his bed, next to her...not some hospital bed on the other side of
a bad reaction! He was here, living. Breathing. Talking to her and...
She wasn't mad? Ha. That was a joke for sure. Koi smirked skeptically at her as he watched her pace across his carpet. Shit, they were back to pacing.
She was pacing today and she was pacing when...he didn't want to think about that. He didn't want to think about the constant shit that kept
hitting the damn fan when it came to he and Devyn. This situation had it's own shit to sort out. He wasn't going to lump situations together. His
headache wouldn't let him do it.
I'm upset with myself for not saying anything in the first place... So, now she had a problem with him using? Koi's face crumpled as he
rubbed his temple, Devyn's next sentence coming like word vomit after the other one. She was spewing emotion, the anger in her voice no longer
directed at Koi. He looked up at her, the hand at his temple falling to his chin as he listened to her...REALLY listened to her. His frustration
melted, his face dropped. He finally heard her. He finally heard what she was trying to say to him. She paused, her pacing halted as her voice
waivered.
...I guess I just wasn't enough. Shit. Her moms was a druggie. She'd died because she was a druggie. Koi finally got it.
"Don't do that..." He spoke softly, his hand grabbing her wrist, pulling her to him as the first tears spilled down her round cheeks. "Please. Devyn
don't cry. Come on."
Don’t do that…Don’t do what? Tell the truth? She wasn’t enough. She hadn’t been enough when her mom needed her the most and she
couldn’t fix it anymore. Her mom was gone and Devyn hadn’t been able to save her. By holding her hand through her crashes, Devyn had told her
she’d be there through anything...And she wasn’t. She’d broken the promise and Yvette was gone...There was no going back and even if there was,
she wouldn’t be able to for what she did to Hilton. He’d kill her. No question...And sometimes she wondered if that would really be so bad.
“It’s true though. I couldn’t help her. I couldn-...I couldn’t save her…” Devyn allowed Koi to pull her back to him, her body filling the
space next to his again as he hugged her. Held her. Dev exhaled, feeling a calm wash over her, letting Koi ground her again. He was good at that.
Keeping her even and calm and...okay. She just wanted the same for him. And she knew she was asking for a lot. Koi was who he was and he did what he
did and gave a fuck who said anything about it, but...she wasn’t going to relive her mistakes. Devyn wasn’t about to let Koi end up like Yvette.
He was stronger than that and she knew it.
“I’m not going do it again, Koi-,” She pulled away from him, her fingers falling between his before she continued. “I’m not going to watch
you die like I watched her and not say anything. I know I can’t tell you to stop, but I can ask and at least feel like I tried.” This was about
her. She’d pretended that it was about Koi and wanting him to be safe and healthy and happy...That wasn’t all bullshit, but she wanted all of
those things for herself. She couldn’t be without him. Losing Koi the same way she’d lost her mother would crush her and she couldn’t
have that. She wouldn’t survive it.
“Just tell me I won’t lose you…”
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Koi's arms wrapped around Devyn as she allowed herself to be pulled to him and held. He knew what she said was true. She wasn't even mad. She was
hurt. He'd hurt her. And what was worse, he'd hurt her the way that her mother had. Unintentionally, but it had happened. And koi hadn't even noticed
it. When she'd turned away a line, it wasn't because she just "didn't do that shit". It was because "that shit" terrified her. That shit, lying on the
table in front of her, made her remember her mother...and losing her. And never seeing her again. Because of "that shit". Koi felt like the goddamn
scum under a nutsack. He felt...dirty. Because he'd caused this. Her tears were his fault. He'd laid in the bed while she'd probably watched over him
the entire night, just to make sure that he didn't up like her mother...and he woke up and couldn't remember a damn thing. He closed his eyes slowly
as he pressed her to his chest, his fingers going to her hair as she cried against him. And he couldn't help but wonder like he'd wonder so many times
before...just why she wasted her time on him. Why she didn't leave his ass to asphyxiate on his own vomit when "that shit" went wrong in his system.
Why did she even give a fuck?
"Devyn. You weren't there, bae." He said, trying to reassure her. She couldn't help her mother because from what he could tell, she was miles away
from her. She was here. And for whatever reason, she couldn't look over her mother. But Koi refused to believe it was her fault. He knew Devyn. If she
could've been with her Moms, she would've. Something was keeping her away. Against her control.
"You can't blame yourself." He spoke quietly, his lips pressing against her head as she finally stopped sniffling. Koi hoped that meant that her tears
had stopped. He hated to see her cry. He hated watching pain in her face...especially when he'd caused it. "I know that wherever she is now, watching
down on you? She doesn't blame you. So why are you blaming yourself?"
He kissed her hair again, feeling her pull away from him as she spoke. Telling him how she wasn't going to go through that again. How she wasn't going
to not speak up while he was killing himself. He swallowed hard as he looked away from her, hearing her continue. She knew that he was his own man.
That he wasn't exactly an order follower. That he handled his problems his own way...which usually ended him up behind bars...or in a "treatment
center". That was his own decision. But she just...fuck.
He sighed as he looked at the intertwined fingers, fighting the thick, choking feeling that had just risen to his throat. He tried to swallow it away,
but it was still there...suffocating. Making him shift on the bed. Making his eyes sting. She didn't want to lose him. He nodded, because he
understood that. He couldn't lose her either. That point was proven with the year they hadn't spoken to each other. She was his best friend...his
baby. He couldn't see her leaving him like that again. So he understood. Because what she was talking about was so much more permanent that just "not
talking" or "being angry". She didn't want to lose him...forever.
"Hey..." He said, pulling her arm softly so that he could make sure she really heard. "You're not losing me. I'm here. I'm breathing." He pulled their
joined hands to his chest, over his heart.
"My hearts still beating." He pulled their hands to his mouth, kissing hers. "You're not losing me, Devyn."
She wanted him to make her yet another promise...Or maybe it was the same promise a second time? She just wanted him to stay for her. She
needed him to stay for her. It had been months, but Devyn still felt her. She still felt the sting of that loss everyday and
Koi was still the only thing keeping her together. Devyn would be lying if she said she felt like there was much else going on in her life. Yeah, she
had college apps and volleyball, but none of that shit really mattered to her. She mostly did that to keep Athena happy; because it was what she was
supposed to do. The only thing that brought her genuine happiness these days was the crew. Miyu, Dhonny, and especially Koi. She had only ever told
the kid, but they were really the only reason she hadn’t faced her fate and flown back home to let Hilton deal with her…
Of course, she hadn’t told Koi all of that. Her family outside of her mom and her aunt was still completely off limits to do any more than
mention, but her point remained. She just wanted to hear that he wasn’t going anywhere. Not that she wasn’t to blame for her mother because she
knew she was. She left her. She and Athena thought that was for the best, but Devyn had always known it wasn’t. She knew that leaving her mom with
her monster of a husband wouldn’t end well, but they convinced her to leave anyway. They told her Yvette would be fine...she wasn’t. She wasn’t
and it was because Devyn was here being chicken shit instead of with her mother being her rock. It was her fault.
Hey…Devyn’s thoughts were broken as Koi asked for her attention. Her free hand came to wipe at her face, drying the tears that had
fallen. You’re not losing me. Devyn heard herself sigh in relief. She didn’t know why; it didn’t necessarily make what he was saying
true. Anything could happen to either of them and she could lose him...but somehow just hearing him say that made her feel better. Made her feel as
though he was really going to try for her. Devyn nodded as he kept talking. Reassuring her that he wasn’t going anywhere. She felt her lips pull at
the corners as he kissed her hand.
“I…-,” Devyn stopped. Her eyes going wide at the realization of what she was about to say to him. I love you. She did. She loved him.
The last time she’d let herself think it was when Miyu told her how stupid loving him made her; but it was true. Devyn loved Koi and it was in this
exact moment that she was letting herself acknowledge that.
“I’m sorry-,” she pulled her hand away from his, laughing a little as she tried to play off her pause. She wiped at her face again, drying the
last of her tears as she stood up. “I, um, thanks kid...I still kinda need you around.” She smirked at him, as she leaned down and kissed his
lips, quickly.
She needed him more than he even knew.
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
![[*]](images/davis/default_icon.gif){kind=icon}
