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Koi
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[*] posted on 19-11-2011 at 09:05 AM
Kitchen




The food goes in here...
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Devyn
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[*] posted on 18-4-2013 at 04:46 PM


She’d shown up unannounced again. She’d sworn to him and Eri that she would never do that again, but she had no idea what to say to him over the phone. She also didn’t want to give him the chance to tell her not to come over. It had been two days since her lunch with Dhonny and she still hadn’t talked to Koi about...before she left. Mostly because she was stuck in a similar place to where she was last Christmas. She didn’t know what to say about it, so she was choosing nothing at all until she was ready. It was easier this time because she hadn’t only been ignoring him, but everyone. Well, almost everyone. She’d seen Dhonny that first day out. Then Miyu came over to the house and slept over while they caught up. Koi, who should have really been first on the list, was next and it was a truth she couldn’t avoid anymore. She had to talk to him, as awkward as it might have been and as unsure as she was about what would happen, she had to see him. Not just to talk, but to simply see him. She had missed him the most while she was “darkside” and she had no problem admitting that to herself.

So here she was. At his door prepared to face him for the first time since their night together. And she couldn’t wait to see his face. Devyn pushed the small doorbell, hearing the chime sound from inside has she had so many times before. She pulled at her shorts, tidying herself as an unfamiliar voice sounded from the other side asking her to wait a second. She did and as the door opened she came face to face with Ipo. She’d only ever met their housekeeper once but she seemed to remember her, telling her hello before ushering her through the front door. Devyn smiled politely as she stepped inside. Was it too much to ask for him to open the door? Just once? She always had some kind of exchange with someone she didn’t come to see before she got to the man she’d come for. “Please, I made lunch, I’ll tell Koi he can meet you in the kitchen.” Great.

Devyn thanked her before going off in the direction of the kitchen, memories of her first real Christmas flooding her mind as she took a seat at the island. She could do this. She was going to see him and she could do this.




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 19-4-2013 at 02:44 PM


"...and when we get downstairs, you keep yo' punk ass out my fridge, nigga!"

So, maybe Koi was a little salty. It wasn't everyday that he got his ass handed to him on the sticks. And what was worse, getting it handed to him in NBA 2k13 by a...fuckin'...dancer. Koi threw no shade, though. Dancers, especially his boy, Dhonny, did the damn thing. They were athletes and there wasn't anyone that could do what his boy did out on the stage or the dance floor. But losing multiple fucking games...to Dhonny...in a row? Yeah, that had hurt Koi's pride. Frankly, Dhonny's underhanded comments only made the shit worse. And by "the shit" Koi meant his annoyance. But to be fair, everything was annoying the shit out of Koi that evening. His shitty lack of game. The picture spam he was getting on his Instagram, like people didn't have fucking lives and all they did was snap duck lipped pictures of themselves all damn day. Ipo's menu from the evening, which just happened to be everything that he DIDN'T want. Honestly, he was just fucking annoyed. And he'd been that way since Dhonny told him the "big news". Devyn was back in town. And everybody knew and had seen her. Everyone except Koi.

"Dhonny. Dude. I mean it!" He shouted as Dhonny reached the bottom of the adjacent staircase that led directly to the kitchen. Ipo had called them down for lunch a couple of minutes ago and the junk food that they'd been munching on the entire day wasn't going to convince Dhonny to play another round. Koi was good on that though as he knew he'd probably just lose again. He hadn't been into it anyway. His mind had been somewhere else from the moment that Dhonny mentioned Devyn. And her absence and silence with Koi kept his mind there. Roaming. Thinking about all the possible reasons why she would have said something to everyone BUT him when she got back into town. Did she really have to say anything to him? Sure, they'd..."made up", but that didn't mean that things were completely resolved. Koi assumed they were...and he was slowly making an ass out of himself, thinking that he'd be the person she called first.

"Fucking...asshole. Really?" Koi asked, chuckling in disbelief as his feet reached the bottom of the stairs and he watched Dhonny do exactly what he told him not to do...put his grimy ass face in the fridge. A head shake was all he could give his friend as his mind went back to wondering...debating. Thinking...about Devyn and her hesitance to see him. As much as his wondering was threatening turning into worrying, he tried to keep cool. He kept a smile on his face with Dhonny, even when he started talking about the lunch trip they'd gone on and all Koi wanted to do was punch his best friend dead in the mouth. He wanted to throw his phone across the room every TIME Miyu asked if Devyn had hit him up yet...because she'd talked to her twice...AND slept the fuck over! This was some shit. Wasn't it? Or was it what Koi should've expected from the girl he'd fought with, made up with, fought with some more, made a truce with...and then slept with?

"Nigga you hear me talking to you!" He shouted, his socked feet padded on the kitchen floor to where Dhonny stood, holding the door of the fridge and letting all the goddamn cold air out. Koi bumped the door with his hand, finally getting Dhonny's attention as he turned around, something smart-assed fixed on his lips...but Dhonny never said it, because something else caught his eye over Koi's shoulder.

"Dev! What up, lovey?" Devyn...





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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Devyn
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[*] posted on 19-4-2013 at 04:14 PM


It had been easier with Dhonny and Miyu. She could talk to them openly, freely. She didn’t have to think about how her words would make them feel because they were different...simple. She and Koi were complicated. She had too many questions for him and she wasn’t sure how or if she should even ask them. She could talk to Dhonny and Miyu without a problem, but when it came to Koi she was just...tongue tied. There was so much she wanted to say...so much she couldn’t say. She couldn’t risk him. She needed Koi more than she needed anyone and she couldn’t say some of the things she wanted to say because based on how things had gone between them before...she just couldn’t. From the sound of things though, he hadn’t been talking to much of anyone either since she left. So imagine her surprise when she heard him speak to...Dhonny? Ooh. That was unexpected. And it kind of complicated things. Despite not wanting to put too much on Koi, she couldn’t deny that she had to at least mention their time together...something she wasn’t sure he’d talked about with Dhonny yet. It was the reason she hadn’t said anything when he asked her...She’d have to play this one cooler than she’d planned...

She sucked in a breath, trying to quell the smile on her face at the sound of Koi’s voice as he cussed at Dhonny. She’d missed this too. Their “old married couple” bickering that she usually got to instigate until they all laughed about whatever had them fighting in the first place. She saw Dhonny first, so intent on getting to the refrigerator he sped right past her. She didn’t have the chance to say anything as Koi followed close behind, his voice raised as he scolded his friend for doing the exact thing he told him not to. Ha. Dhonny turned around to say something smart but his words stalled as he finally caught sight of her, her name leaving his lips.

“Hey Dhonny-,” Her teeth took in her bottom lip as she tried to stop her smile from growning, her eyes falling to Koi afterher short greeting with Dhonny, “Kidd...hey.”




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 20-4-2013 at 06:56 AM


Dev! What's up, Lovey? The fuck was Dhonny talking about? Koi's brow furrowed as he followed Dhonny's lead, turning around to face the island in the middle of the kitchen. And there she was...standing next to one of the stools. Dressed in the same short shorts. The same black hair. Biting her lip the same way she did when she was trying to swallow a smile. Devyn. She was here. She spoke softly, greeting both he and Dhonny though the only name Koi was really interested in hearing fall from her lips was his own. Kidd...hey. A smile matching hers spread across Koi's face. A careful one, not too overly anxious and barely holding back the excitement he felt at finally seeing her face. Finally hearing her voice. Finally having her here.

"Dev..." He said slowly, leaning on the fridge so that it shut, nearly with Dhonny inside of it. Koi caught the sneer on Dhonny's face as he bumped Koi's shoulder and made his way to Devyn, wrapping her in a hug. Koi hung back, watching the two greet each other...and wishing, quietly, that there wasn't so much unsaid between them that he could've greeted her the same way. But he couldn't, not yet. Not in front of Dhonny. Not when they had so much to talk about and...did they? Did they even have shit to discuss? Or was Koi doing exactly what he refused to do and knew he shouldn't have been doing in the first place...making a big deal out of nothing. Sure, the night before she'd left had been...heavy, to say the least. They'd made up and...made more than just "up" the entire night. And then, after that? Nothing. No calls, no texts...and Koi didn't necessarily make the attempt to do either. She needed her space. She needed time and she needed to be with her family. She didn't need another conversation that might've turned into another disagreement. She needed peace. And just like he had the night before she left...Koi gave her what she needed.

"Damn, Dhonny...a nigga can't greet her before you start rubbin' on her?" Koi joked, hanging back by the refrigerator as Dhonny sat on the stool next to where she stood, his arm wrapped around her shoulders. Like usual, Dhonny stayed quiet, his goofy grin and a middle finger in the air greeting his comment. Typical. Koi chuckled again, rolling his eyes as his gaze fell on Devyn...and kind of stayed there. He couldn't...figure out what to say. Should he have asked her how the funeral was? Or how her family was or...he didn't know. He didn't know what to say to sound like nothing had changed...so he didn't say anything. He just looked at her, his gaze falling away when he felt Dhonny's eyes on him.





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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Devyn
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[*] posted on 20-4-2013 at 11:42 AM


Koi. She watched a smile pull at his lips and the urge to kiss him became overwhelming. Shit. This was what had taken her so long to come here. The feelings. Don’t get her wrong, Devyn was going to keep herself in check. There wasn’t any pressure and if what happened between them had been just a one time thing that would be cool, but...damn, if she didn’t...feel for him. Feelings that she could and would suppress. Especially in front of Dhonny as she had no idea what he did and did not know. Or what Koi wanted him to. If their night together was something he didn’t want getting out then she could keep that in the box of things she didn’t talk about along with her feelings. It was all good. They were all good. And she wanted nothing more than to keep it that way.

Koi said her name as Dhonny came to her, pulling her into a hug of greeting that she easily returned. Koi could’ve done the same, but he didn’t. Hanging back as Dhonny filled the seat beside her, his are still around her shoulders. He spoke again, teasing Dhonny about his closeness. She laughed a little as Dhonny’s middle finger went up, their cute little spat moving on from the refrigerator argument. A short silence fell between them and in it she and Koi just kind of stared. He was in the same place she was. Unsure of what to say and probably kind of stuck in...other thoughts. Like how much hadn’t changed. Same bleached curls, same cute hipster swag, and that same crooked smile that happened when he was trying not to show how pleased he was with something. He didn’t have to say it. She could see that he missed her.

He looked away, his eyes finding the floor as she realized why. Dhonny was watching. And if Koi was hiding while Dhonny was watching that meant he didn’t know. She could work with that, her fingers coming to play in Dhonny’s hair, the way they usually did when she fell into the married couple role the two of them played with one another. Nothing was different. Everything was everything and Dhonny would believe it. It’d be even easier to sell if the two of them weren’t acting like touching was a cardinal sin with him in the room.

“I mean, it doesn’t look like I’m getting too much love from you,” she teased, allowing her smile to broaden, “Come over here,” she said sweetly, her arms opening to him for a hug. She stepped away from Dhonny to meet him. She could do this if he could...




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 20-4-2013 at 12:52 PM


Why did Koi even care? Why did he care that his boy was there and why the hell did that keep him from greeting, talking to or hugging Devyn the way he wanted to the second he saw her standing in his kitchen? One reason. Dhonny didn't know. He knew about the reconciliation and how they'd squashed the bullshit, but he didn't know HOW. He didn't know about the night Koi and Devyn had spent together. And he didn't know how nothing between them...changed. There weren't any feelings, right? There was only friendship and mutual respect...and that was enough for the two of them. But for Dhonny? Nothing was enough but what HE believed was happening between the two of them...the one thing that Koi would never be able to give any female because Koi Kidd didn't do love. He just didn't. Not for anyone. And to avoid Dhonny's mouth, he'd keep doing what he was doing now.

Standing there. He gritted his teeth a little, his eyes meeting Devyn as she stood...watching her play with Dhonny's hair. Ugh. Koi wasn't pressed. He knew the flirting that went on with Dhonny and Devyn wasn't anything real, he just...he didn't care! He didn't care! He didn't give a shit because they were all friends in the room, right? And even if they weren't and Devyn and Dhonny were rolling that way, it would still be okay because Koi and Devyn were...

...it doesn't look like I'm getting too much love from you. Koi smirked at Devyn quickly as she stepped away from Dhonny and invited Koi over, her arms opened wide. He looked at her eyes for a second before he began walking towards her and he knew. She wanted to play the same game that he wanted to play...at least in front of Dhonny. At least until they got the time to talk, just the two of them...nobody in their business but THEM. With that in mind, he made his way over to her, pushing Dhonny's shoulder as he got closer to them.

"Welcome back..." He said quietly, his arms wrapping around her waist as he pulled her into him. 1, 2... Silently, he counted the seconds of their hug, careful not to let it go on too long. Because as good as touching her felt...as good as she smelled...as good as his body felt pressed against hers? He could've made that hug last the whole damn day...

Damn...he missed her.





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 20-4-2013 at 01:56 PM


Neither of them should have cared. In her opinion there was nothing to care about. She needed him and he was there for her. That was friendship. That’s what they were right? Sure, okay, they’d had sex once. But it was probably only going to be the one time and it wasn’t that big of a deal...right? She could pretend that was true. She knew from experience Koi didn’t do feelings so she couldn’t make too much out of it. Koi had been what she needed and that was it. That was them. Being what the other one needed. So why the act? why the distance and the need to put on a show for Dhonny? She wasn’t sure. But until she was, she had no problem keeping up the act. They just needed to talk. She needed Koi to tell her where the two of them were and then they could push past these awkward gazes and uncertain hands. The could go back to being friends...

She invited him in, her arms open for the hug he had yet to ask her for. She could do this if he could. The two of them hugged all the time before the fallout. Short, simple, sweet. The hug two friends shared in greeting. The hug neither of them was sharing now as his hands wrapped about her waist and her hips fell into his. He welcomed her back. In her mind back to him, but he was more than likely talking about life in general. She let herself enjoy his closeness, as she counted the seconds that he held her, her head pressed against his chest. She wanted to stay. Just like this, with him, for the rest of the day. She wanted their morning after back, memories of breakfast in bed flooding her mind before it slipped into their shower afterwards. She let him go then, sure that her demeanor had changed at the thought of shower sex with him. Shit.

“Glad to be back, kid.” she said drawing away, taking a few steps back to lean against the island next to Dhonny. She needed something normal to say. Something to start a conversation and keep her mind off of the ache the distance between them was causing. “Where’s your other half?” She asked referring to Eri. That was always a safe bet. Eri would keep her well behaved. Because the way he held her? The way he smelled? She was ready to make their one time thing a recurring event.




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 21-4-2013 at 04:21 AM


With her pressed against his chest, Koi realized for the briefest second that he'd forgotten. He'd forgotten about...that night. Yeah, he remembered details about her...the physical things they'd shared. But other details came streaming back to him. Like, how her curves fit into places on him like puzzle pieces. And how she felt right against him, her head pressed against his chest like his heartbeat was a song just for her. They'd laid like that that night. Him underneath her, her body shuddering against his in the aftermath. There was peace there. The same peace he felt for the second they were close to each other in that too quick hug. Koi fought the urge to hang on as he felt her body stiffen and begin to pull away. She had probably been counting the seconds just like he had and knew to cut their hug short before they got a bit too obvious. He was cool with that, especially as he caught the almost cheshire cat-like, smug ass smile on Dhonny's face. Great...

Devyn walked back the island, falling back into place beside Dhonny...and the silence lingered in the air again. Koi shifted on his feet before he followed the footsteps Devyn had just taken to the island where Ipo's lunch spread was laid out. Cuban sandwiches and fries...eh. He didn't know what it was but he wasn't...hungry. For good measure, he grabbed one of the prepared plates she'd set out and bit down on one of the thick cut fries Ipo had homemade. Anything to keep his hands and mouth busy. But it seemed he didn't have to do the talking as Devyn filled the short silence with a question about his little sister.

"Eri?" He asked, knowing who Devyn was talking about. The longer the answer, the shorter the silence right? "She's at the sitter's house tonight..." Koi's eyes left their focus on the plate in front of him and settled on Devyn, wanting to see the reaction on her face when she found out that the house would be empty tonight...which meant what? Damn, he really needed to get it together. So what if his house was empty tonight? He and Dhonny would kick it that night and if Devyn wanted to join, she could! Just...a couple of friends. Shootin' the shit. Nothing changed. He kept telling himself that and he would make a mantra out of those words if he needed to because all these second thoughts about something that probably wasn't even going to HAPPEN again was making the situation more awkward. More tight. He needed to drop it. He gave her what she needed...and now, that was over.

"She's gonna be pissed she missed you..." He said simply, pulling out of his gaze on her and nearly clamping his mouth shut to avoid adding on to that sentence. Especially as his next words were ...unless you want to spend the night... Dammit...





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 21-4-2013 at 02:35 PM


She wanted to go back to him. Even as she fell back in place next to Dhonny, ignoring the curious gaze and all-knowing smile on his face, she wanted nothing more than to let Koi hold her again. To listen to his heart beat slow as he sighed quietly and they melded into one another. She couldn’t, so she changed the subject to something safer, asking about her little sweetheart Eri. She’d been missing from her life too, which was kind of unfair to her. Devyn might not have owed her anything, but she was a sweet girl; Dev could have done better...she was willing to today, seeing as how Dhonny’s eyes burning holes into her was getting really old really quick. Only, Eri wasn’t here. Oh...

Dev’s features shifted into a soft pout at the news. That meant it was just she, Koi, and Dhonny...until Dhonny left. No! No. What was she doing? There was no need for Dhonny to leave. All three of them, could hang, as per usual, shooting the shit and teaming up on a Call of Duty deathmatch. Nothing was different from before and she was sure once she got the chance to talk to Koi about where they stood she could really ease into normalcy.

“I’ll have to come back around to catch her. I promised her a girls’ day like a year ago,” It was true. She had and she hadn’t delivered...Another one of those awkward silences fell between them and again Devyn made sure it didn’t linger. “D, you’re really quiet,” she said softly, her shoulder nudging him a bit. That fucking know it all smile was speaking volumes though. Dhonny thought he knew something. Devyn wanted to know what that was.




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 28-4-2013 at 03:28 PM


The pout that appeared on Devyn's face was real. She missed Koi's little babe and the truth was that Eri had missed Devyn too. Devyn had been gone, out of their lives for nearly a year and Koi couldn't pretend like he was the only one that felt her absence. That he was the only one that couldn't get their head around her not being there. Eri had had a hard time with Devyn not showing up at the crib as the friendship they'd made last Christmas was deeper than Koi could've even began to imagine. She asked nonstop questions about Devyn's "disappearance" too, but Koi couldn't give any answers. And to be real fucking truthful, he didn't want to give any...because he knew how stupid any answer he gave would sound. I nearly slept with Devyn and now she's gone. I fucked it up. But now he didn't have to give any answers because Devyn was back, for good he hoped...and she and Eri deserved some time together. And if it hadn't been for Devyn showing up unexpectedly they would've had it. Koi didn't really care about the logistics, though. Devyn was here. That was enough.

"It's good, though..." He said, his smile hitting the ground rather than the face it was meant for. "She won't be TOO mad at you." Koi's comment was forgotten as soon as it was made as Devyn's focus switched to Dhonny. No surprise there as he'd been church mouse quiet sitting beside Devyn, that stupid ass smile the only thing that was talking. And it was talking loud. Shit was smug as hell and it said one thing. Dhonny was figuring it out. And Koi wasn't the only one putting the pieces to that grin together as Devyn made a comment about it, asking him what was up...prodding him. Seeing exactly what he THOUGHT he knew.

"What?" Dhonny replied smoothly, like two of the people that knew him the best weren't figuring him out, reading that Chesire Cat smile like it was a fucking "See Spot Run" book. What-the fuck-ever. Koi was giving him two seconds before he started spilling some shit about the "aura" in the room and sensing some crazy shit with his "third eye".

"Dev, babe...I'm just glad we're havin' a reunion. Really..." Dhonny chuckled, his gaze leaving Devyn's face...moving to Koi's, reading the "stop the aura reading bullshit" expression there. Instead of taking the hint, Dhonny smiled wider, the whites of his teeth peeking from between his lips. And that's when Koi knew. He was about to start some shit.

"I'm just...feeling the vibe in here. It's all love and..." Dhonny started, his sentence faltering as he shrugged at the new look forming on Koi's face. The one that said how far and how fast Koi would put his foot up Dhonny's ass if he started in on them the way he'd been onto Koi that entire evening. Mentioning Devyn's name just to see the way Koi's face shifted when he heard it. Making short, annoying quips about he and Devyn's lunchdate between all the trash talking. Koi wasn't looking forward to Dhonny running his mouth again...especially when his was the last voice Koi wanted to hear. It was obvious what he wanted...time with Devyn. Time to talk about the things they'd left unsaid for too long. And he wanted Dhonny to get the fuck out so he could do it.

"...and I just remembered that I've got shit to do...upstairs. So. You two play nice." And it seemed that Dhonny was going to do the smart thing and take his damn leave as he picked up the plate Ipo had made for him. With a quick kiss to Devyn's cheek, Dhonny jogged up the stairs, throwing that same damn grin over his shoulder until he was out of sight.





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 28-4-2013 at 04:40 PM


Devyn had missed Eri. She and Eri had made something of a deep connection that Christmas and not seeing her since was really unfair. To Eri and to Devyn. But it wasn’t as if she had a choice. She and Koi hadn’t necessarily taken the time to lay out a custody agreement before their non-breakup. And she couldn’t necessarily just drop in back then. They weren’t friends. But they most certainly were now; maybe something a little more than that. At least that was what Dhonny was thinking. It was written all over that smug little smirk of his, teasing her with the things he thought he knew. He was wrong though...or was he? Devyn didn’t know and she couldn’t know until Dhonny gave them some space. They had shit to talk about that Koi obviously didn’t want him knowing (which was a whole other worry in itself for her). She would love some alone time with him. Time to talk.

So she prodded Dhonny, asking why he was so quiet. He tried to play stupid, as if he didn’t know what Devyn was talking about, but everyone in that kitchen knew better. Dhonny was a lot of things but stupid wasn’t one of them. In fact, Dhonny was pretty fucking astute and it was just that that had Devyn calling him out. He thought he knew something and she wanted to know what. Hell, maybe she had been reading this whole thing wrong and Dhonny knew everything and Koi’d made him swear not to talk about it. She doubted that though. It just didn’t seem...right...

Dhonny fed her a line about him just being happy the band was back together and she scoffed, a soft giggle leaving her. “Is that what that cheshire cat smile is about-,” she questioned playfully, a hand going back to his scalp as she leaned into him. “You’re a bad liar Dhruv Ross.” She smiled at him and he began again, assuring her that he was just “feeling the vibe”. Uh huh. Her eyes stayed on his, but Dhonny’s had looked back to his plate, his hand picking up a fry before looking at Koi. He stopped mid-sentence, a mute shrug on his shoulders and Devy was sure, without even looking, that Koi was the reason for the change of course.

A major change as Dhonny finished his sentence by telling them he was...leaving? Devyn smiled as he moved away from her, his lips kissing her cheek before he took his leave without another word. God, he was a know it all ass, but he was just too sweet not to love. Taking Dhonny's seat, she smiled at the thought before it hit her that she and Koi were...alone. Her smile didn’t fade as yet another uncomfortable silence fell between the two of them. She didn’t know what to break it with this time. She wasn’t sure what he wanted to hear and to be quite honest, she had no idea what to say. She could apologize, but she wasn’t sorry about anything that had happened between them. She could lie, but she didn’t want to. Not to him. So she told the truth, her voice low with her eyes still in her lap.

“I missed you...a lot, actually.”




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 29-4-2013 at 04:32 PM


The silence settled over the kitchen as soon as Dhonny vanished upstairs...or pretended like he was vanishing upstairs as he was still the nosiest nigga that Koi had ever met. But Koi had never known his boy to be so nosy that he turned into Harriet the fuckin' Spy or some shit, so he was pretty sure that he and Devyn were alone. Finally. And with them by themselves, all the things that Koi was saying with his eyes could be said with something ten times more useful...like his mouth. Right. Wrong. The best he could do was watch her sit in the seat that Dhonny had just vacated and...that was it. He watched. The smile that didn't drop from her lips. The way her curls tumbled to the side as she messed them the way she did when got nervous. Or maybe it was because she didn't know what to say. That made the two of them. So they just...watched each other. Waiting for some way to break that damn awful silence.

I missed you...a lot, actually. Looking into her face, Koi felt himself smile. Even though he couldn't see her eyes, he knew she was telling the truth. She missed him. Even though she'd hit up Dhonny and Miyu first thing and she'd saved him for last...she'd missed him. Koi didn't know why the confession made him warm inside. He didn't know why he couldn't hide the smile on his face now. All he knew was that with her words, she let him know. Nothing changed... They'd made peace. They'd made more than that and when they did, they sealed shit between them. And crazy enough, it felt like nothing could fuck them up now. Nothing.

Closing the small space between where he stood and where she sat, Koi hovered over her, his hand leaving his side as it wrapped around her wrist, pulling her from the stool. He lifted her chin, his back bending to her height...his lips touching hers softly.

"A lot...ain't the word, Hips." He whispered against her lips before he took them in, his kiss pulling them before she opened to him. He didn't hesitate to taste her, their tongues falling into a routine he didn't even know they'd memorized. His hand went to her back, pulling her to him like there was actually an inch of room between them. There wasn't. He felt like he was crushing her but the thirst was real. Their kisses slowed as they held each other. Smiling against her lips, his arms tightened around her waist, lifting her off her feet.

"For real...welcome back." His words fell between their short pecks, his eyes meeting hers before they fell into their kiss again.





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 29-4-2013 at 07:37 PM


She could take it. Whatever he decided to say about where they stood was going to be fine. She had given him time to think about the things that had happened that night, she had basically ignored him while she was “gone”, and he was the last person she reached out to when she “got back”. She would understand if he was upset...The silence that settled between them was deafening, but it was speaking volumes at the same time. Koi didn’t know what to say either. Neither of them wanted to say the wrong thing so each of them was stuck. Stuck between wanting to spill a stream of their feelings or let them trickle out bit by bit. Devyn spoke first choosing the later.

She couldn’t look at him when she said it but she really had missed him. She expected questions. If that was true why didn’t you call? Why wasn’t I the first person you came to when you got back? She expected them but they didn’t come. The silence lingered as he came closer to her, her eyes snapping up to meet his as he hovered over her and what she saw there was...something it couldn’t be. She wasn’t seeing what she thought she was seeing because Koi didn’t do feelings. He didn’t do...her thoughts stopped as he pulled her from her seat, lifting her face to his and speaking against her lips. A lot wasn’t the word. It didn’t suffice. It wasn’t enough. She agreed.

And she might have told him that except she became lost in the kiss they were sharing, her lips parting to taste what she had been missing for so long. She heard herself moan as he pulled her impossibly closer, her arms falling around his neck as she tried to do the same. Devyn could only think more. She wanted to make up for the weeks they’d been apart and she wanted...more. More him. More this. More them.

The kisses slowed but neither of them backed away much. Devyn was fighting the smile that threatened to pull at her lips but she could feel his, her lips continuing to peck at his. She felt him tense as he lifted her from the floor, her legs wrapping easily around his waist. He spoke, welcoming her back yet again. “Shhh-,” she paused, her lips meeting his again. “More.” It was still the only word she could think and right now, it was all she needed. More him. More this. More them.

Her body bucked against his as their kiss began again, slower this time. Deeper. This really wasn’t why she’d come here. She’d wanted to talk to him. Figure out where the two of them stood in this whole thing after their night together and then another few weeks apart. But this was better right? This was...mmm. She moaned again his name mumbled against his lips. She probably should have stopped what was happening between them now. She should have told him that this wasn’t a friendship. But maybe it was. It was a friendship plus what she’d asked for...More.




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 4-6-2013 at 07:30 PM


Shhh. More. Her commands stopped everything. Every word. There weren't anymore words...because all that they needed to say had already been said. They missed each other... That was enough. Right? For the moment, Koi wanted it to be, especially with Devyn wrapped him the way that she was, her body pushing against him, his arms wrapped around her waist as they kissed. Space between them was so nonexistent that their heartbeats damn near echoed each other. Her upbeats matching his. His downbeat repeating hers. That was how it always was with them. Their bodies falling into so much synch that words were forgotten...and actions and moans became primary communication. And even though there were things that needed to be said...things that should've been said the moment they were alone, they went back to what they knew. Touch. Koi's hands moved to the thighs that gripped his waist, tightening at the warmth of Devyn's skin underneath his touch. And even though he'd held her what felt like a thousand times before, it was like the "first time" again. It felt like the "first time" every time. The jump in his pulse. The warmth that fell over him. The rush of his nerves igniting. All of it...just from the sensation of her.

No words? That was fine with him as his lips were too preoccupied to worry about shit like "words" and "discussions"...at least that what his mind was telling him. The same mind that was so wrapped in the moment between them that everything else took a back seat. Everything except for Devyn. And Devyn's lips. And Devyn's moans...and, damn, Devyn's nails raking down his back. Nothing fucking mattered...even though somewhere, in the list of things that should've been relevant as fuck, the things they needed to "discuss" were probably number one. Like the night she'd come for him...in more ways the one. And what all of that shit...meant. Yeah. That. Those thoughts. They did exist. Somewhere. But that somewhere wasn't here. Not now. Not while he had her in his arms...

Without breaking their kiss, Koi lowered Devyn on the top of the island, his hand finding its way into her curls, his grasp tilting her head slightly...his kiss leaving her lips and falling to the crook of her neck. This was dangerous... Koi knew it. They weren't the only ones in the house...and where this kiss was headed...the little secret that they'd silently decided to keep? Yeah...it was about to be wide the fuck in the open. Right in the middle of the kitchen...





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 5-6-2013 at 05:23 AM


He was giving her what she asked for, his voice going silent as his lips kept talking to her. Kissing her. Tasting her...They didn’t need to speak because, as usual, this was enough. Everything they needed to say was being conveyed in moans, sighs, and touches that were quickly becoming more than she meant them to in his kitchen with other people in his home. But she couldn’t stop. Not now. Not yet. She had missed him and for some reason this felt more real than just saying it...Or maybe she was worried that if she kept saying it with words ‘missed’ would become a word neither of them was ready to hear. So she asked for more. The quiet was golden and it had already put her in a place where next to nothing mattered. Not her mom, not the conversation they needed to have, not anyone or anything outside of she and him, in this space, right now.

Her hands slipped from around his neck, sliding down his chest before reaching around to rest on his back, somehow pulling him further into her. Her hands slipped, raking over his back as he sat her on the island. They couldn’t have been closer...well they could’ve been, but not in his kitchen, right? Not...Damn. She felt his hand come to play in her hair and she moaned he pulled it a little, tilting her head to get at her neck. This boy was pressing buttons that he couldn’t unpress and if he wasn’t careful Dhonny would know first hand what the two of them were keeping from him. Shit...Koi’s kiss turned to a suck and her eyes lulled closed as Devyn felt the rest of her resolve falter. Fuck it. Fuck him... One of her hands came between them her fingers tucking themselves just behind the band of his basketball shorts. Half of her was telling herself there was no way the two of them wouldn’t get caught, but the other was screaming to do him anyway.

Luckily, or maybe unlucky, for the two of them, it wasn’t a decision that was in their hands any longer as a voice sounded that was neither Koi’s nor Devyn’s, “Koi Kidd, I know you’re not doing what I think you are in your mother’s kitchen-,” her voice was chiding as if he were stealing cookies before dinner, but that didn’t stop Devyn from nearly pushing Koi over before hopping off of the countertop, a soft ‘oh God!’ on her lips as she stood to her feet, avoiding eye contact with Ipo at all costs.

Jesus! It was like all they knew how to do was get caught!




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 5-6-2013 at 06:16 PM


Actions were speaking louder than words could...or ever would at least when it came to Koi and Devyn. This was the typical. The "go to". The predisposed reaction whenever an action brought them together. Audible shit didn't have to transform into words. Just groans...like the soft one leaving Koi's lips as he gently pulled at the skin on Devyn's neck, his tongue tasting the sweetness of her skin. And then there was the physical. That shit talked. It screamed...louder than any explanation could of what they were. Of who they were to each other. And even if in the particular situation words, where were probably needed, Koi didn't want words. Words made shit difficult. This was easier. Touching. Teasing. Tasting. Too much talking fucked perfection up. And this was perfection. Letting the feeling of Devyn against him wash over him like some repetitive high. Feeling the shudder of pleasure run the length of her body. Who needed words? What the fuck for? All Koi needed was this. And whatever this led to...

And "whatever" looked like it was heading that way fast and without hesitation. No hesitation... Koi liked that. No thinking...no fucks given. Not even with Dhonny upstairs, hopefully minding his own damn business. And even if he wasn't...at this point? Koi didn't give a shit. He was there...and Devyn was too. And that was all that concerned him. Bedroom, kitchen, bed, counter. The shit was all synonymous. And it could keep sounding the same, words and meanings blurring together with Devyn's body pressed against him. He would care later...after. After "whatever" turned into something more tangible and he was more than just pressed against her. And it looked like she was thinking the same thing, her hand leaving his back and moving between them...moving to the band of his shorts...teasing him as they slipped behind it and...

Koi Kidd... All he need to hear was his government name in that voice and there was about a foot of personal space between he and Devyn. Not like he needed separate himself from her as Devyn pushed from underneath him and slid off the counter top.

"Oh shit..." He laughed, rubbing his hand over curls to hide the red of embarrassment that had begun to settle in his hot cheeks. "That wasn't what it...yeah I'm lying. That was exactly what it looked like..." Another chuckle left his lips as he leaned against the side of the island and grimaced, looking into Ipo's unamused expression...which he could barely do without laughing again. Because laughter would've just made the displeasure in her narrowed eyes more apparent than it already was.

"I'm sorry?" He tried, Ipo's expression didn't change. Instead, she chuckled and rolled her eyes, shifting the strap of the purse she carried further onto her arm.

"Okay, you two..." She said, sighing heavily. "I'm leaving for the day. At least try and behave..." Turning on her heels and walking to the foyer before she got an answer. Ipo knew better. She'd worked for the Kidd family long enough to know that "behaving" was asking a lot. A whole fucking lot. But she could hope if she wanted to...





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 6-6-2013 at 04:21 AM


She fucking hated this house! It was where a majority of her most embarrassing moments had occurred and she could add this one to the list. She couldn’t believe what she’d almost done in this kid’s kitchen. With Dhonny upstairs. With Ipo close by, and now in front of the two of them as they separated like atoms with the same charge. She felt her cheeks begin to heat as she ran a hand through her hair and turned partly to Koi hoping he’d explain better than she could. He didn’t. His face was turning candy apple red as he took the “who me?” stance that all caught men take. She sighed as he gave a laugh that matched his barely there embarrassment. Not funny! Nothing about the two of them getting caught about to have sex in his parent’s kitchen was remotely funny! And then came his attempt at an explanation. That wasn’t what it...

“Oh my God Koi, please stop,” she swatted at him, the back of her hand connecting with his stomach. That was exactly what it looked like...This guy! Neither she nor Ipo were amused and he was doing nothing to make it any better. Even his questionable apology didn’t seem to soften her. Devyn probably should have given one too, but the look on Ipo’s face told her silence was probably better...or maybe Dev was wrong, a chuckle falling from Ipo as she rolled her eyes at the two of them. Devyn heaved a small sigh of relief and a small, polite smile pulled at her lips as Ipo announced her departure. Behave? She could try...Ipo was out of sight before either of them gave a response about their intent to behave. Perhaps she already knew better...

Devyn was the first to speak, yet another sigh on her lips as she reclaimed her seat. “I hate you so much. I just thought you should know,” she said it, but the smile on her face betrayed her true feelings. Which were...what? They still hadn’t talked about anything they were supposed to what with their mouths being...otherwise engaged. “Maybe we should try this “behave” thing.” Devyn laughed a little at the thought. As if that would last for too long.




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 7-6-2013 at 06:14 PM


How was this not kind of funny? Because even though his cheeks were burning and Ipo was probably two seconds from letting his Moms know what had almost gone down on her kitchen counter space, Koi couldn't help but let go of a amused laugh. It never fucking failed when it came to Devyn. If something was going down, there was a 90% chance they were getting caught. And sometimes, all you could do was laugh about that shit...or avoid eye contact, which was the route that Devyn was deciding to take. Hey, it could've been worse. Exhibit A? That night by his pool. THAT had been the pentacle of embarrassment and if they hadn't done some fast moving, he would've never lived that one down. On the list of "getting caught fails", that one would've topped the cake. Scarring your sister for life is something that sticks in the memory banks a lot longer than "got caught by the housekeeper". Even his Pops wasn't phased by that one and that fucker was married. This little mishap was the least of Koi's worries and the laughter that was pushing at his lips was a sign of that.

All the laughter that Koi was holding onto broke through his tight-lipped smile as Ipo left the room. He couldn't help it! And as soon as Devyn stopped being so damn concerned, she would laugh too...at least he hoped she would as she moved back to her seat beside the island.

"C'mon!" Koi said, her playful anger making him smile even harder. Moving closer to her, he nudged her arm, his hand coming up and tugging mischievously on one of her long curls. "It could've been worse, babe. It could've been Dhonny..." His whispered words were true, no matter if she wanted to admit it or not. Dhonny catching them would've been worse than Ipo's narrow eyed glare. Any day. And wasn't that the opposite of what they wanted. Not that Koi wanted to keep secrets from one of the best friends he'd ever or would ever have. It wasn't that at all. It was just...he didn't know. And Koi meant that literally. He didn't know what any of this meant. Not what had happened the night before Devyn left for her mother's funeral. Not what had just happened in the kitchen...and what could've happened if Ipo hadn't intervened. And was just...something about people being in business that they hadn't even sorted out yet.

"Behave? What is...I literally don't know what the fuck that word means." The serious look on his face almost slipped as he parted her legs, moving between them. Bending over her, he kissed her forehead before he lowered his lips to hers, pecking them quickly.

"Seriously. You wanna behave? We'll behave."






you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 7-6-2013 at 07:18 PM


C’mon! No! Not come on! She didn’t care how perfect his smile was or how cute he was being with his fingers playing at her hair. This wasn’t funny...much...It seemed she was right about their night together being a one off, because they were destined to be interrupted by any and everyone. Except Dhonny as Koi pointed out. It was her turn to laugh as she thought of just the face Dhonny would have if it had been him. That fucking know-it-all smirk and his signature “I told you so face”. Dhonny didn’t judge but whether he knew it or not he did gloat when someone proved him right. Never with words, but his expressive ass face made those irrelevant. But, in all seriousness, Koi was right. Dhonny would have been the worst to catch them here because that would have lead to questions and questions would have lead to answers that neither of them knew yet because they hadn’t spoken to one another.

Devyn sighed, suggesting that they take Ipo’s advice and at least try to behave. They really did need to figure this out. This...them. She was ready for it. If things had changed with him or if they remained the same Dev was going to be cool about it. She would be cool about it because...she couldn’t lose him. Not again. Not for another unbearable year of adding him to the long ass list of shit she tried and failed not to think about. With her mother at the top of that now she wouldn’t be able to handle it. Devyn was going to be completely zen about however Koi was feeling...but it would have been nice to know something solid with all the mixed signals they were throwing. They parted ways as friends, but here they were making out and back to pet names. She was glad he wasn’t calling her ‘homie’ though.

His words interrupted her thoughts as he kept up this adorable, playful, little banter that was making her...fuck. He parted her legs, sliding between them before his lips fell to her forehead in the sweetest kiss. She only stared, unable to think of anything to say to this Koi. This was the Koi she was always stunned around. The Koi from their Christmas together. The Koi that showed when he was busy adoring his sister...and his other babe...his lips pecked hers before he said something else but...what? Ugh! He was doing this on purpose! She smirked, her hand meeting his chest before she gently pushed him back, her legs closing in front of him.

“Maybe I should go upstairs and see if Dhonny knows what behave means,” her smile grew, “You think it’ll be something like this or no?” She watched his features shift as the beginning of a pout formed. Ha. Now things were funny. “Awww, kid. Don’t be like that. I’ll be good if you will.”




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 10-6-2013 at 05:46 PM


"Behave" was a word that was left up to the interpretation of the person using it. At least in Koi's mind that was truth as he'd never tried to make that word into an action his whole damn life. And he wouldn't start now, no offense to Ipo. Yeah, his housekeeper was damn near the closest thing he had to a mother some nights as she seemed to care a whole lot more than his own did, but behaving wasn't on the agenda for the evening...especially now that Devyn was back and shit was right with the world. They were right. Things could go back to what could be barely described by the word "normal", but it was normal for them. Dhonny would keep being the nosy sensei he was, Miyu would be THE sickiest Asian on the island...and he and Devyn would go back to being thick as thieves. Even if no one could understand it, they would. And that was all that Koi needed. Who needed to "behave" when shit just got back to being lovely again? Nope, no behaving that night. They'd call Miyu over, roll a few, pop open a couple of the Moet bottles his Pops have been saving for the day the entire earth realized how amazing Shemar Kidd really, truly was (never gonna fucking happening) and they'd party until people were so shitted...that they wouldn't notice he and Devyn slipping off to his room. And maybe then they could finish what they'd started in, how'd Ipo put it? Oh, yeah...in his mother's kitchen.

Koi smiled as Devyn intercepted another kiss to her glossed lips. His eyebrows rose as she pushed him from between her legs, her smile growing as she began to speak and even before she got the words out, Koi knew she was about to say something crazy. Dhonny. Oh. For real? Unintentionally, his nose crinkled, his top lip curling before he could catch it. The fuck was she bringing up her...hubby for? Koi couldn't even begin to describe how annoyed that shit made him. That married couple act that Dhonny and Devyn stayed playing around with was beyond stupid.

"That's messed up..." He said, rolling his eyes as he stepped back, not needing her push to put distance between them. Sure, Dhonny was his boy. There wasn't anyone tighter than the two of them and nothing had or would ever get between them. But THAT shit? Koi could barely tolerate it. All up in each other's faces like Dhonny just got done diggin' it out on some honeymoon shit or something.

"Keep playin'. You already know what's up, hips." Koi said with a smirk, the pout erasing off of his face as he reminded Devyn, with one word, how much something with Dhonny, for jokes or for real, would never Koi. Just like she'd said the first night they almost got into it at his house party, Hips was just for him. And he knew she meant that shit...

"But I can be good. See?" He held up his hands as he leaned against the island again. "Hands to myself. I'll be good. Just for you..."





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 11-6-2013 at 05:46 PM


She couldn’t help the small giggle she gave as she watched his features shift, his nose wrinkling in mild disgust at the mere suggestion of Devyn and Dhonny “behaving” with one another. The idea was ridiculous of course. Dhonny was more like the brother Devyn was missing now that Kareem was...Kareem. Dhonny was genuine and he actually gave a shit. That’s where her love for him ended though...Not that she hadn’t given him the once over when the first started hanging out, but now things were different; they knew one another and now even kissing Dhonny would just be strange...But that didn’t mean their closeness wasn’t an annoyance to Koi. She and Dhonny had always played the “couple” game and before shit got messed up between Koi and Devyn and the group was the group, she would laugh at Koi getting all in his feelings over nothing. It was still funny, but she was starting to reevaluate the reason why Koi got touchy when it came to she and Dhonny.

It was why they were really here wasn’t it? A definition, however loose, of what the two of them were to one another. An explanation of all the things neither of them had taken the time to explain the night she found out about her mom. Devyn had questions, and she was sure Koi had a few himself. Them skirting around the issue, no matter how fun their particular form of “skirting” was, was only going to make things more complicated. She was sure Dhonny was upstairs brimming with a few questions too, and whether they resolved to tell him to mind his fucking business or gave him the story from start to finish, Devyn wanted to know first. Where did they stand?

She smiled at him as he vowed to be good. Just for her. “Just for now,” she said quickly. “I want you to be bad for me later though.” Devyn paused, partly deciding whether or not she wanted to change her mind about being bad later and just skipping this whole...thing they were about to do. Koi knew how she got when he gave her the look he was giving her now, his eyes hitting all the parts of her he probably wanted to put his mouth on, with that sexy little lip lick...Damn, he was so fucking... Devyn sighed, crossing her legs as she looked away from him. She opened a door. It was time to walk through it.

“I mean...If that’s...a thing with us...”




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 12-6-2013 at 06:28 PM


Just for now decency? Koi could do that. Not that he needed to show his ass twenty four- ah, who the fuck was he kidding? He was a nasty motherfucker. Plain and simple. But he kind of owed Devyn a moment of good behavior considering how her cheeks were still a light shade of red after that run in with Ipo. On that fact alone, he'd do it for his homie. Besides, the air was still heavy in the kitchen...like something weighted was still there between them that hadn't been mentioned yet. Or better yet, had been avoided. And like he said before, he didn't mind avoiding when that avoidance involved him touching Devyn the way he had moments ago. Sex was the escape. It kept them from facing the shit that they weren't ready to define. Like the night she spent with him. There were eons of shit that needed to be said about that night. But the truth? He low key didn't even want to discuss it because that night had done enough to cross lines and confuse niggas. And part of him wanted to avoid that it had done just that for him.

"Oh shit...I can do that." He spoke softly, licking his lips as his hands dropped to the sides of the island. He clenched them to keep from moving back to the place where Devyn stood. She'd already pushed him away once and the same would happen again...because it was time to stop avoiding. At least that's what her eyes said while all his were doing was the ordinary undressing of her curves. It couldn't be helped. His bitch was a bad one. But she asked something of him and he wouldn't break his promise to her.

"And...that's supposed to mean?" He asked, chuckling a little at her stumbling over her words. A thing with us? What was that supposed to mean? How they tended to avoid the obvious? Or...the one thing that Koi wasn't really...he didn't know HOW to discuss without collars getting tighter and nerves getting shook.

"Take a breath...and just talk to me..." Koi smiled again, trying to diffuse some of the nervousness that he heard in Devyn's voice...but all he really found himself doing was trying to cover up the nervous he was feeling himself.





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 12-6-2013 at 07:38 PM


And...that’s supposed to mean? He knew what the fuck it meant! Koi knew damn well what she was talking about and he was dead wrong for playing like he didn’t...she got it though. Neither of them really wanted to discuss what they were to one another now. It was labels that got them in trouble the last time they’d gotten hot and heavy...but time had gone by and things had changed. labels weren’t at all necessary and there was no pressure on Koi for anything...well, a few answers, but those were necessary! All she needed to know was what to say when people asked about them. In mere minutes either they would go upstairs or Dhonny would come down and she was sure his first question would be something along the lines of “Are you two friends now?”...she needed to know too.

She sighed, taking the suggested breath before trying to talk to him about what was obviously a taboo subject for him. But she wasn’t going to put this all on her, oh no. Koi was the decision maker for this one, it was the way things had to be and she was fine with it. She just wanted to make sure he was always around. “I’m not trying to make things awkward Koi, I just...-,” her words trailed off as she wasn’t sure how to put what she wanted into words. She just needed to...know about them. But she was trying to avoid using words that made them sound like a connected unit. She didn’t even want to hint at them being a couple for fear of scaring him off again. Just talk to me...Okay.

“I need you. And I know that sounds stalker-y, but it’s not. I mean I don’t mean for it to be-,” she paused sighing again as she tried to clean up the mess she’d made with the few words she’d spoken. “What I mean is...you’re holding me together kid. I kinda need that right now.” That was pressure. It was too much. She was laying too much on him and it was probably doing the opposite of what she needed it to...but fuck it. He told her to just talk.

“Just tell me what we’re telling people...”




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 13-6-2013 at 05:06 PM


And with a couple of words, Devyn pretty much proved his assumptions correct. They were about to have "the talk". The discussion that Koi hadn't even wanted to touch just to avoid the shit that they always seemed to get themselves into when they went there. The arguing. The fighting. And then, in the end, the silence. The complete radio silence between the two of them, fueled by anger and all that goddamn stubbornness when neither of them gets their way. Koi wasn't ready for that place again. He never wanted that place again...not for them. Things were good now, weren't they? They'd squashed the bullshit long enough to start something new between the two of them. They weren't just friends anymore. They weren't just "homies" which was why the name that Koi had called Devyn for so long would never fit the way it always used to. After the night together...things had changed. But...they kind of were the same. Koi didn't...he wouldn't fuck that up. Awkward wasn't what Koi was afraid of when it came to them. Done was.

In the short silence, he started to open his mouth and say something, anything to break up the silence...but seeing the look on Devyn's face made him close it. She had something to say. I need you... She needed him? He shifted on his feet, his brow furrowing at those words. She needed him. Koi was needed. Something inside of Devyn needed something inside of him and...it scared him. Not because of what that meant. But because of what it meant for him. Koi wasn't dependable. Not at the least bit. He was too much like his fucking father and not enough like his mother. He failed people. He disappointed...often. He wasn't someone that somebody usually needed. He was the one that people didn't want to see coming because of the trouble and confusion that he brought with him. Koi wasn't...nobody needed motherfucking Koi Kidd.

But she did... As Devyn's words hit him, talking about how he was "holding her together" and how she needed that from him, he understood. Her moms. With everything that she'd lost, she needed something to need. She needed someone who would give her what she needed. And Koi made a promise the night the slept together...that he would that for her. Whatever she needed...he'd be that for her. And nothing changed that. Not his doubts...not his fucking fears. He'd get over that shit and try his damn hardest for her. Without words, his hand reached for hers, pulling it from her lap, intertwining their fingers.

"I got you, Hips..." He said quietly, smiling at her as she looked up at him, his fingers rubbing against hers.

"And we can tell nosy motherfuckers whatever we want to. Fuck 'em." He muttered, staring at their joined hands. "It's nobody's business but ours. And you know who I am...and I know who you are. Right?"





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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