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Koi
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[*] posted on 2-8-2014 at 03:11 PM


He didn't want to be...near her right now. He couldn't stand it. All of the anger he couldn't help feeling at his father coursed through him and honestly, he didn't think he could stand any more. And his mother...his allowing ass mother and all of her "make it better, take the brunt of the load" bullshit. He couldn't stand it. That soft, almost pleading voice she was using with his father. Like she'd done something and she hadn't even been there when the argument started. No, only Shemar had a talent for that bull, being the cause and fire for every situation that had turned wrong in their household. No, Koi's mother was the "savior", his father's bullshit putting her on a cross every time it went down. That night was nothing new; her voice balancing between pleading and prodding. The balance was delicate, a tipping in any other direction and the fight would start all over again. But it worked, Shemar firing another lingering glare in Koi's direction before turned and made his exit, his footsteps ascending the stairs. Good. The fucker was gone. But there was something about the situation that had the muscles in his stomach still tense, his stomach crawling with as much irritation and restlessness as it had been when his father was in his face, daring him to make the first move. His eyes rolled as his mother spoke to him, Devyn's hand leaving his face as she moved to let his mother fill the space she'd just left. He stared at his mother's outreached hand, his own going up as he backed away from her. He didn't WANT her. He didn't want her to make it better like she would obviously try to do. He didn't want her to play the buffer. He didn't want her.

"I'm out." He said between his teeth, his legs finally moving. He moved so suddenly, his mother couldn't help but stumble over her words, not understanding his anger. He didn't expect her to. She never did when it came to him being angry at her for the role she played when it came to his father. He got it. She wanted to keep the peace. She wanted her family to survive the storms that rolled in whenever Shemar Kidd crossed the threshold of their home. But Koi was over that lie. He was over her spinning plate act. It was time out for that bullshit and what was more, it was time out for the sacrificial lamb role that his mother couldn't HELP but fall into.

"You don't understand, right? I don't expect you to..." He spat harshly as he walked out the back door leading to the garage, Devyn walking quickly behind him as she made her best efforts to keep up.





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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Devyn
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[*] posted on 3-8-2014 at 03:17 PM


He didn’t need to say anything else. Devyn could hear it in his “really?” how much emotion was on the edge of coming out. She could see it in his face, his skin flushed red and his jaw still clenched. He needed to calm down. She stepped in front of him, between he and his father, now that Shemar was backing down. They had Fumie to thank for that. So why did it seem like Koi was a long way from thanking her. That really hadn’t been directed at his father. He was talking to his mom; he was upset with her for talking his dad into leaving. And that became apparent as he stormed off.

“Kid, wait-,” Where was he going? Why was he mad at Fumie? Mouthing an apology to his mom, Devyn started after a quickly retreating Koi and she was barely keeping up. “Babe, please stop. Just-,” she reached out for him, catching his wrist on a backswing just as he reached the garage door. “Koi talk to me a second, please.” She was begging him. She didn’t like seeing him like this...It reminded her of Valentine’s Day and neither of them wanted to relive that. But she was willing to relive it if it meant he wasn’t about to go out and do something stupid.

“I shouldn’t have said anything, kid. I’m sorry,” she paused, her hand sliding down his wrist, her fingers falling between his. “Come with me? We can get a room...I won’t do any more talking…” She tried to smile, her voice taking the gentle tone Fumie’s had moments earlier talking to her husband. She didn’t want him to do anything stupid because of her. All of this shit was because of her and she wouldn’t let it get any worse. She lifted on her toes, her lips pecking his cheek as she waited for his answer.

“You don’t have to be alone right now…”




We both done had our hearts broke.
Take it easy; I'm not tryna go against ya,
I could be a lone wolf with ya
Gotta get up outta here and you ain't leaving me behind.
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[*] posted on 3-8-2014 at 09:59 PM


Rolling his eyes at the sound of Devyn's voice, Koi's steps slowed against his better judgement. Her calling his name, telling him to "wait" on her, which in normal circumstances wasn't something she would've ever had to ask Koi to do. But that night? She was on the list of things that he needed to get the fuck away from...especially since most of the shit that had gone down in his kitchen that night had been HER fault. Koi'd said it. He didn't want to talk about it... He didn't want to discuss the pregnancy that wasn't. They'd dodged that shit with luck that he didn't know that EITHER of them had and all he wanted to do was stop THINKING about it. And all Devyn wanted to do was talk about it...and the emotions he was supposed to be feeling. He didn't want to feel anything...especially now. Especially after what her prying had caused with his father. He just wanted her to...back up. Give him space. But that was the complete opposite of what Devyn wanted to do as she caught him by the wrist, slowing his escape from his parents...and her too.

"Whatever Devyn." He said simply, shrugging with irritation as she apologized for doing exactly what he tried to stop her from doing. But that was how things went. Her, always thinking she knew the best when he was obviously telling her what he KNEW to be true. What did she think? That she knew his parents better than he did? The fuck was she playing at with his dad? Shemar Kidd wouldn't have known what to do with an important conversation if you paid him and gave him a script. He was a fucking child. But no, Devyn knew what she was doing, right?

He blinked slowly through her apology, her invitation to spend the night forgetting what had just gone down in the kitchen doing nothing for Koi but making him more annoyed. He just wanted to stop talking...and listening to people talk.

"Nah, I'm good." He refused to look at her as he pulled his hand from hers, stepping away from her closeness. "Really..." His words were dry as he finally looked down at her...which was the hugest fucking mistake, the mix of feelings hitting her, her face changing...Koi's stomach knotting up at the sight of it.

"I'm just gonna...go to Dhonny's." Was he? Because he knew what going to Dhonny's house meant. More prying. More "advice" that he didn't want. Another person talking at him about what he should be doing and how he should be feeling. He didn't know if he could take that tonight.





you're so brave.
stonecold crazy for lovin' me. & i'm amazed.
hope you make it out alive...

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[*] posted on 25-6-2016 at 11:49 AM


Fumie winced, resisting the urge to curse as Zori finished wrapping her foot. He had just pulled a huge piece of what used to be her Lalique vase out of it. Apparently "help" to Eri had meant Zori. He was here minutes after Shemar left and Fumie honestly couldn't have been more grateful. It seemed to always be this way with him, appearing when she most needed him. It was a trend that wasn't stopping tonight.

After Zori helped her give Koi a once over and was just as unsuccessful in getting him to go to the hospital, they went to find Eri who was in her usual place in the closet. Traumatized. This was a mess. It was all a mess and Fumie had no idea where to even start in fixing any of it. She should have never let it come to this. She should have been more interested in keeping her children safe than telling Shemar off. It hadn't been the time or the place to go toe to toe with him about...how had this...Oh no...Prom. Fumie had forgotten all about prom. It all seemed small and insignificant now.

"I didn't mean for her to call you-," she said to Zori for the umteenth time. She just kept pulling him into the hot mess that was her life and she knew he had to be tired of it. She was. Her favorite moments with him had been the ones in which they could forget her drama. Not when he was riding in on his white horse to pull her back together. "Thank you for being here, Zo."

She took her foot out of his lap and attempted to stand. She winced again, allowing the pain to settle in her foot as she put weight on it. She needed to call and let Dhonny know what was going on with Koi. What time was it? He could have easily been on his way here...and she would tell him not to come. Devyn was going to be disappointed, but this night was ruined. Koi would not be able to handle a "party" right now and, in all honesty, Fumie didn't want either of her kids away from her right now.

"I can't believe I let this happen..."




I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
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Zori
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[*] posted on 27-6-2016 at 03:46 PM


As much as Fumie had resisted, Zori knew it. She'd needed a hospital as much as her son had, but it seemed she and Koi were cut from the same cloth. She needed stitches. A piece of glass about as big as his thumb nail had been lodged in her foot and no matter of sanitizing and wrapping was going to make that injury heal right. Zori had been surprised that he'd gotten it to stop bleeding. But Fumie wasn't hearing it. She wasn't leaving that house and she wasn't leaving her children. Zori got it though. He understood. Had it been him? He wouldn't have let his kids out of his sight either. Koi had to basically pry her off of him just to go upstairs and clean his face...which his bastard of a daddy had made a mess of. Zori shook his head at his thoughts, putting away the bandages and antiseptic he'd used to take care of Fumie's foot back into the first aid kit he'd gotten them from.

Even though he felt unnecessarily guilty about it, he had no qualms calling Shemar what he was. And yes. He still felt the heaviness in his stomach sometimes. The tightness in his throat...the heat in his face whenever he visited Fumie's house. Though he understood her and her situation a lot better now than when they'd first crossed the threshold between friends and "something else", he still couldn't help feeling the shame that accompanied sneaking around with a married woman. Though, walking in on the aftermath of Shemar's latest "temper tantrum" lessened that shame by a couple degrees.

"It's okay, Fumie." He said softly, hopefully removing any guilt she felt about Eri calling Zori to intervene in the mess that Shemar'd made, once again, of his family. She didn't have to do that. There was no need for her to apologize, especially when none of this was a burden for him. Fumie was...important to him. That made her family equally as important. He'd jumped to action as soon as he'd heard Eri's voice on the line. She hadn't sounded...right. Her voice, that had always seemed too old and too wise for a little girl like her, was all wrong. She sounded...terrified. Broken. And it had scared the shit straight out of him. So much so that he'd made it to Fumie's in record time.

"I don't mind this." He said, his fingertips lightly tracing Fumie's bare leg as she moved it to stand on her injured foot. "I don't mind any of this. You know that."

He watched her quietly as she put her weight on her foot, grimacing as she tested it out. Tried to walk on it. Even as she did that, Zori could see her mind working. He knew she was thinking. About how she was going to fix it. How she was going to make everything better. It was Koi's prom that night. And as hard as he'd worked to even GET to prom, now...Zori wasn't so sure if he'd even make it there. Not the way his eye was looking, swollen so badly that Zori wasn't sure if the boy could even see out of it straight.

"Hey..." He started, standing to his feet. Gently, he reached out for her, his hand grabbing her arm, pulling her to him. Purely by habit, his eyes scanned the room quickly before he pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her. He let his lips press against the top of her head before he spoke.

"You don't get to do that." He muttered, taking time with his words.

"You don't get to blame yourself for something that...he did. He ruined tonight, baby. Not you..."





"The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearances."

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[*] posted on 28-6-2016 at 03:20 PM


Fumie had grown used to not seeking medical attention after one of Shemar's episodes; especially when there was nothing truly wrong with her. She wasn't bleeding...much. And nothing was broken...well not physically. This family was completely torn apart, so beyond repair that Fumie couldn't even think about a fix for this. If she were being honest with herself, she knew what the fix was. It was exactly what this fight had been about. A divorce. She needed to get her family away from their father. It was a thought no mother should ever have to have and yet she'd had it so many times in the past few years that she'd lost count. She had to ask herself, how had she let this happen? How had she stayed long enough for it to come to this? Long enough that her 10 year old had to call her mother's boyfriend for help...a boyfriend who "didn't mind".

Zori didn't mind the inconvenience Fumie was causing. He didn't mind having to come help her clean up a mess she'd had a hand in making. He didn't mind...

"I do." Fumie minded a great deal. None of this should have been happening. Zori shouldn't have been here because Eri called him in a panic. Eri never should have been in that panic. She never should have felt like she had to jump into a fight between her parents. Fumie shouldn't have had to fight with Shemar over allowing Koi to do something as simple as going to prom. So, yes. She most certainly minded all of this. She hated it and more importantly, she hated herself for it.

Zori stood, pulling her gently into him as he called to her. Comforted her. She sighed as his lips pressed against the top of her head and she allowed herself to settle into the safest place she knew. You don't get to do that. He never let her blame herself. He never let her take responsibility for what Shemar did. Fumie was slowly coming to see that not everything was her fault, but this...she'd instigated this. There were plenty of times where she could have submitted. She could have told Shemar what he wanted to hear, waited until he left; which he would definitely do, and Koi could have had his night. But she didn't. And now things were ruined. Shemar got his way anyway.

"Koi can't go to prom with his face like that, Zo." She spoke into his chest, her arms looping around his waist as she allowed herself to be held for a while. She didn't care about appearances right now. She needed him. "It doesn't matter who's to blame...he's probably so disappointed and this is a once in a lifetime night that he has to miss because I-," she stopped herself. Pulling away from Zori as she finally got the nerve to tell him all of what had happened here.

"I goaded him, Zori...I told him it was over. I asked for a divorce."




I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
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[*] posted on 29-6-2016 at 02:25 PM


I do. Of course she cared about the havoc that Shemar caused in her life. And of course she cared about getting the man that she was dating on the side involved in it. It was all a little...complicated? Was that the word? Honestly...Zori didn't care. Just like he'd said, he didn't mind it. None of it. Yeah, at first, it was difficult. Seeing her get text messages from Shemar, her husband. Some nights, hearing her say that she couldn't stay the night with him. Touching her...in her deepest, most intimate places...and wondering if she was remembering Shemar, reminiscing on the times when his hands and his words didn't mean "pain". Zori would lay awake at night and wonder...really think to himself. What the fuck was he doing? But it was moments like this, when he could be there for her...when her could make her pain go away. Moments like this were what made him stay. It made him batten down the hatches and weather the storms with her. Because...he couldn't leave her alone. Not to handle it all by herself.

"I know, baby...I know." He whispered as Fumie told him what he'd been thinking. Koi couldn't go to prom. Not looking the way he did. Not only because he'd get questions that he was positive the kid didn't want to answer. But because it would raise eyebrows. Important eyebrows. And he knew Fumie would come under fire that Zori knew she wasn't ready for. School officials. Medical...the Press. Fumie seemed like she hadn't even fully processed what had gone down in their living room. How the hell was she going to explain what her family really was behind closed doors?

"He worked so damn hard." Zori exhaled, holding her tighter as she talked about how disappointed Koi would be, how all of it was ruined because she...

"Because you what?" His words probably went unheard, Fumie pulling herself away from him, looking him his eyes as she steadied herself and...

I told him it was over. I asked for a divorce.

Zori's eyes widened before he could stop his reaction. He exhaled again, his mouth hanging open as he processed what Fumie'd just told him. The fight...it was because of that? He thought she'd said it had been about prom, but...wait. What? That simple statement that shouldn't have been as heavy as it was sat in the air, surrounded by silence. She'd asked for a divorce.

"Wow." That was basically the only thing Zori could think to say. Not because it wasn't something that needed to happen. Of course Fumie needed to divorce Shemar. Not because she was...dating a man that for damn sure wasn't her husband. No...because she knew it...and Zori knew. She had to leave. She HAD to leave him.

"How you feeling about that?" Was that the question Zori wanted to ask her? Of course not. Does he know about me? That was more like it. Hell, questions weren't really on his list of things to do either. Telling her she deserved to be away from that goddamn monster. Telling her he supported her and he'd be by her through the entire shit storm. Telling her he loved her. Those were the more appropriate responses...





"The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearances."

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[*] posted on 2-7-2016 at 04:08 AM


Fumie watched his eyes widen at her words and immediately wondered if she'd said too much. She didn't want him to think her confession was more than it was. This wasn't her pushing him for commitment or asking him to marry her. In truth, after what had happened tonight, Fumie could easily see taking a break from relationships with any men for a while. She could easily see taking some time to find herself and figure out her life after Shemar...She was only telling Zori what happened. Because this time was her fault. She knew how Shemar would react. She'd planned for it and still she'd pushed. Fumie had been more than willing to take her lumps and serve him with the papers after, but her children weren't willing to allow that and they had never been part of her plan.

Fumie sighed as Zori did, a short response to her confession on his lips. Wow. Yeah Wow. After twenty years with her abusive husband, Fumie had finally found the spine to stand up and make him her ex. Koi and Eri never should've been home when she'd confronted Shemar though. Because now they were here; with Koi cleaning up his face, Eri unable to stop her tears, and Fumie trying to figure out how they all move forward and how she was supposed to feel about any of it.

She had been happy. Embarrassingly, deliriously happy when she realized that she could leave. That she was the only one still holding herself back. Now though? After what she'd let her tormenter do to her children...she was a little scared. Fumie could only imagine how messy Shemar would let the divorce get. He would want to take everything from her, which would be more than fine if she thought he would leave her children out of it. But she knew he wouldn't. Shemar would fight for custody of the kids he hated; the kids he didn't even know. He would pull out every stop to twist their situation into something it wasn't if it meant making her unhappy. She was afraid to leave... but she was terrified of staying.

"I...I don't know-," she really didn't. It was so...complicated. Fumie sighed. "I just want my kids to be happy and safe and I know they could never be that with him. I can't either."




I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
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[*] posted on 3-7-2016 at 05:56 PM


Fumie leaving Shemar. Their divorce. It wasn't as simple as that, Zori knew that... with no questions asked. He'd never watched someone go through a divorce, but it seemed like a hell of a lot of red tape, money and lawyers. And that was only the beginning of the battle that Zori was sure that it would be for Fumie. Shemar was an asshole. Nothing about this journey was going to be easy for her. He'd drag her through as much mud as he could make. Mud that involved her children, their home, the foundation that Fumie founded and ran...hell, even Zori. And honestly, he couldn't wait to see the story Shemar spun about him...if he even knew about him yet. About them, he meant. He and Fumie, otherwise known as the "indecent" relationship that moments like this made Zori not give a damn about being in. Which he was sure his Momma would shake her head and threaten to tear his hide if she found out. But he didn't regret it anymore...being with Fumie. Supporting her while her world flipped upside down. Picking up the broken pieces with her. That was what they were. Sure, hey hadn't put a name on it exactly...and Zori wasn't in a rush. He knew when to take his time.

"Nothing that you said...or did was wrong." He reassured her as she explained her decision, which she never had to do. She didn't have to explain leaving Shemar to him. Zori'd witnessed more than enough in that evening alone to understand the actions she was taking.

"You're doing what you need to do for you...and for the kids. That doesn't need an explanation." He slid his hand behind her neck, rubbing her there reassuringly.

Smiling, he let his hand slide down to her shoulder, squeezing it softly moving away from her before one of the kids came into the kitchen and saw them close. Intimate. Enough had gone down that evening in that house. Explaining what Zori and Mommy were wasn't something he wanted to add to the list of events. Those kids had been through enough.

"Well...since you won't let me take you to the hospital..." He smirked, still regretting that decision as he'd just pulled a sliver of glass out of her foot, that cut looking nastier than she'd admit.

"...you could at least let me whip something up for you and the kids...just until you figure out what to do about Koi's prom." Ipo had gone for the evening, way before the altercation with Shemar had started. Zori knew that comfort food wouldn't make anything better, but he didn't mind trying what he could to put the evening back together.





"The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearances."

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[*] posted on 3-7-2016 at 06:39 PM


She sometimes wondered if Zori meant the things he told her or if he was just trying to make her feel better. He couldn't have possibly believed that she hadn't made terrible decisions tonight. She knew her part in things and while she was learning that not everything was her fault, she couldn't deny that she had encourages Shemar's violence. She laughed, she taunted him, she confessed her hatred for him more than once. Fumie had laid it all out for Shemar and she had literally dared him to do his fucking worst. She'd told him to kill her. With Koi standing there watching, she'd choked out a weak "do it" before he actually attempted choking the life out of her.

"I said and did plenty wrong, babe...I'm a fucking disaster." She sighed, pulling her hands through her hair as she rolled her neck a little. He still didn't believe it. According to Zori she'd done what she had to do. That was partly true. She wasn't arguing that what she'd done didn't need to happen. Just that it shouldn't have happened when her kids were home. She allowed him to comfort her anyway, his hand sliding behind her neck, letting her know he was still there with her. She found herself giving a small smile that matched his as he moved away from her. She was falling for him.

Fumie would be honest, she wasn't sure about her feelings for Zori when she started feeling him. She knew he was different and he made her feel wanted, but she had been so disconnected from love and attention for so long that it could have just been pure infatuation. Maybe even just lust. She'd wanted him from the beginning, but she hadn't known for sure what that meant until their first time together in his office. And that feeling only intensified in the care he showed the morning after. She was feeling what she felt like love should feel like. But how could she trust herself to know? She'd been married to Shemar for so long she wasn't sure she could trust her judgement of anything...But Zori was good. That much she knew.

"Please. Don't-," she waved his request to cook off. As if he needed to do anymore than he already had for her. She couldn't let him do...Fumie stopped, her head turning toward the stairs as she listened. She thought at first that she was hearing Eri at the stairs a light knock sounding a bit like her feet padding back downstairs now that she was sure it was safe. But it lasted too long and the rhythm was steady. Someone was knocking upstairs. She knew it wasn't Koi, he wasn't in any space to check on Eri, he wasn't even taking care of himself.

"Eri, sweets, what's happening?" she yelled it, waiting to hear her response. Feeling dread as it didn't come. Hearing herself mutter a concerned, "What now?" as she headed toward the stairs.




I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
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