Koi swallowed hard as his mother's eyes burned into his, her gaze unblinking. He rarely saw her like this. Shit, he NEVER saw her like this when it
came to him. Yeah, he got into his fair share of trouble, but usually...she took it all in stride. His Moms was always the calm one. His father, on
the other hand, was the one that acted a dumb ass donkey, braying his annoyance for Koi's very existence and resenting that ONE TIME he neglected to
pull out. Whatever. The fact was Koi never got this side of his Moms when shit hit the fan. And to be honest? He never wanted to again. His
heart was thudding so fucking fast in his chest he could swear he would burp it up. He subconsciously slouched lower where he sat as she spoke to him,
her voice a stinging whisper, threatening...no promising action if Koi didn't come with the truth in ten seconds. Hell, he wasn't even sure if he had
THAT long. All because of that stupid, fucking BOX. He didn't want to talk about it. He damn sure didn't want to even THINK about it. But it was
obvious that nothing would make his mom let it go but an answer. A straight answer.
"Mommy...okay." He said, his exasperation showing as he narrowed his eyes, his hands going up defensively. "Da-I mean...dang." His lip curled as he
broke eye contact with her, her voice softening as she spoke to him again. Talking about how she cared...how his father cared (doubtful) and how they
just wanted to support him in anything that he wanted to do. What were they talking about?! Automatically jumping to the worst fucking thing they
could.
"She's-" He started...and his father interrupted. STILL talking the same stupid mess that he always talked. How he wasn't here for Koi. How Fumie was
the one supporting her son and Shemar wanted NO part of it. Wow. So that was new? Koi couldn't remember a time when his father wanted any part in his
life, so why would this be any different? The only thing that mattered to Shemar Kidd was his delusion of some fucking legacy he was building. A
legacy that Koi didn't even really give a shit about. But when it came to really being there for Koi and helping his son do...shit, ANYTHING...he was
absent. A non factor. NONEXISTENT.
"You know what? Whatever Pops." He sucked his teeth, shaking his head. "She ain't even pregnant. Now you know. You happy?!" Standing to his feet, he
picked up his hat from the bed. He was ready to leave. Ready to get the hell on and finish this conversation that they shouldn't have even been having
in the first place.
"And even if she was, I STILL wouldn't need your damn support! I never got it before? The hell would I need it now!?"
Mommy, okay… No. None of this ‘Mommy’ shit. She wasn’t calming down until they had a serious fucking conversation about what the fuck
was going on in her fucking house and who was going to be living in it in the next nine months. She just didn’t understand why the hell he was
making this so hard! Did he know what Fumie would have given for JUST ONE of her parents to understand when she and Shemar told them she was pregnant?
Of course he didn’t. He had never met his grandparents. And not because they were sick, or in some kind of coma, or dead. It was because she was
dead. To them at least. Koi would never know her parents because they didn’t bother to ask the questions she was asking. Because they weren’t
interested in being grandparents before in-laws. Because...what the fuck did it matter now? The point was, Koi had something that Fumie hadn’t. A
parent that was willing to listen and here he was, not talking.
He was dropping the bullshit though. Finally starting to say something that wasn’t ‘we’re fine’. She’s-...and cue Shemar,
interjecting where he was not needed. Ugh! Just as Koi was about to tell her something of substance, here comes his father to throw him off track
again. Fumie heard herself sigh in frustration as she watched Koi’s attention turn from her to Shemar. And cue the attitude...She ain’t even
pregnant...You happy?!
She wasn’t pregnant?
Fumie would be honest. The thought never crossed her mind that the box may just be a box and there was no bigger consequence on the other end of it.
She hadn’t considered that the girl koi knocked up might not be...was it true? Was she really not pregnant or was he just trying to get his father
to shut the fuck up. Lord knows, Fumie sure as hell was trying.
Grabbing at Koi’s arm as he tried to exit, Fumie turned him back to look at her, “She’s not pregnant?” Her eyes locked with his once again as
she silently demanded an answer. Nothing mattered outside of that right now. His father, Shemar’s fucking money, nothing. Nothing other than knowing
all her stress had been for not and her baby wasn’t having a baby.
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
There. An answer. That's what they wanted right? To hear an response to a topic that Koi thought wasn't even up for any type of discussion.
So...he could go now, yes? Shit. He wanted it finished. He fucked up. He got it. He was tired of being reminded of it. He and Devyn were on a
"hiatus", breaking from each other because just looking at each other reminded them of the shit that they were trying so hard to forget. He wanted to
forget it. And NOTHING would let him. Not his mom. Not his trashy bastard father and not that fucking pregnancy box that had started this whole thing
in the first place. He just wanted to GO. Get in his fucking car and drive. The thing was...he didn't know where. "Away" was a good idea. Away from
his thoughts, from the drama...and from the constant reminder of how fucked the situation with he and Devyn was getting. He didn't want to THINK about
it. He wanted them to just be "them". They'd just gotten over the outside factors and now, they had the inside to deal with?
She's not pregnant? Koi couldn't help the irritated sigh that left him as his mother's hand caught his arm on his way out of the room. Didn't
he just SAY that she wasn't? Was that not what he just said? He loved his Moms, he really did. But she was laying it on heavy. He got it. She just
needed to know. She needed to make sure that the facade that she was working so hard to build was still perfect. She needed to know if there was
something ELSE that she needed to repair, hiding the shards that didn't fit anymore when she found out that she couldn't put everything back together
again. He got it. But he didn't care. He wished SHE got it. He wished that she could see that he wanted to be anywhere but in that room talking about
THIS THING that wouldn't stop living and breathing. It was alive. Just like the baby that he and Devyn barely dodged. He wanted to be away from his
fucking father, that smug look on his face at Koi's outburst...waiting for the confirmation that he hadn't fucked his future career...not to mention
the LEGACY.
"She's not." He said again, confirming what his mother had believed she heard. Turning his head away from her scathing, searching eyes, he looked to
the doorway.
Devyn wasn’t pregnant. Maybe they hadn’t even been talking about Devyn. It didn’t matter. What did matter was that she, whoever she was,
wasn’t pregnant. Fumie searched her sons face for any trace of dishonesty and she heard herself sigh as she concluded that there were none. She felt
her lips pull at the corners as she fought back a smile. Her baby was staying her baby. He wasn’t bringing anyone new into the world and he still
had a future. She hadn’t been this relieved since doctors told her he was a healthy and happy baby boy.
Before she know what she was doing Fumie had pulled her into him, her lips meeting his forehead again and again before she held her son to her in a
hug that was probably way too tight. She sighed again, feeling the relief pulse through her. This whole night had been a never ending
nightmare. Thinking he was having a baby, Shemar’s foolishness, Koi’s foolishness...All for not. She might have been upset about it, but she was
entirely too pleased that her son was not making her a grandmother before she was ready...before HE was ready.
“Oh, baby, I love you so much-,” She sighed again trying to pull him closer. He couldn’t be any closer and she was probably suffocating the boy.
And when had she started crying? She let him go, finally pulling away from him and letting herself smile. “Go to bed, sweets. We can talk more
tomorrow...” He didn’t want that, she knew that shit for sure. But they had things to talk about. Even if there was no baby this was still a big
deal for him...a big deal that could wait until morning.
She pulled him in again, giving him another quick kiss to the forehead before she let him go. All of them needed some rest after all of this.
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
She wasn't even sure what she had done, but as always Fumie was wrong, her son hated her, and her husband was the real cause of it all. What had just
happened in the kitchen was a complete mystery to her, but with Devyn there she didn't have to jump too far to a conclusion. Shemar hated that girl.
For some reason (possibly that his heart had gone missing a long time ago), Shemar had hated that girl since the Gala. He'd taken many an
opportunity to let Fumie know she needed to keep an eye on his "son and his new play date". And after the pregnancy scare? Please. He never wanted
"her golddigging ass" to set foot in his house again. She was going to fuck up Koi's game and most importantly, his legacy and Shemar couldn't have
that. His son's happiness be damned she guessed.
That was probably plenty of information and she probably shouldn't press him for any more about what happened downstairs. But she knew what she saw.
She had never seen Koi look at his father like that she she did not miss that the front of her son's shirt had been ceased as if someone had tried
picking him up by his collar. She knew Shemar couldn't be that fucking stupid, but she would ask just to make sure. He knew that was one of her
deal-breakers. His temper could get the best of him and he could slap the shit out of her all day long. Her babies though? No.
She didn't knock as she pushed open the door to the guest room, standing in the doorway. "You wanna tell me what happened down there?"
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
Throwing a chest-burning shot back, Shemar poured a second one over the melted ice in his whiskey glass, the copper liquor going back into his throat
to chase the first one. He shouldn't have been drinking whiskey after the beer he'd had in the kitchen but...fuck it! Especially when he as he was hot
as hell at everything that had played out in the kitchen. If it wasn't that gap kneed bitch mouthing off to him in his OWN HOME, it was his son
defending her little money-sniffing ass! The damn disrespect though! The scene kept playing back in his mind. His bird chested, whipped, fucker of a
son, nose held high like he had the balls to hold it there. He didn't have SHIT! And he certainly wouldn't after that show he'd put on in front of
that girl that wouldn't have lasted longer than a night if her pussy game hadn't been on point. Or was it her head game? It had to be one of the two
considering that she was still around against Shemar's wishes.
He snorted at her constant presence in his house and the fact that his wife wasn't even phased at seeing her there. She was more surprised at the shit
going down, which told him that when he wasn't in his house, that hoe was. He shook his head, his anger bubbling to a new level as he though about
Fumie. Shuffling him out the kitchen like he was some bad ass dog who stepped in his own shit. Coddling Koi every chance she got. The blame for that
spoiled ass was solely on her head. She let him get his way too much, that night included. And that's when it hit Shemar, clear as damn day. He
was losing control. Fumie's dismissing him, that GIRL still finding herself in his space, Koi's defiance? That was it. The only person that knew
what time it was in the Kidd house was his daughter! But considering he wasn't sure she even knew what time was with her weird ass...
You wanna tell me what happened down there? Shemar scoffed as he turned from the dresser where he stood, the bottle of whiskey still in his
hand.
"Oh!" He exclaimed, pointing the bottle at Fumie. "Now you wanna hear what I have to say? I thought you sent me to my room, Mommy." Glaring at her, he
poured another glass and downed it before he slammed both the bottle and the glass on the dresser.
Great. He was drinking. That was going to make this conversation all the more hard to have. All she could hope was that she could keep him contained.
The last thing she wanted was for Eri to see him going off the way she knew he was about to. His tantrums were childish to Fumie, but her baby had
been afraid of him for years now. She couldn't handle her father angry...Fumie stepped into the room, trying her damnedest not to roll her
eyes at the beginning of what she knew was going to be a long blaming session with him. She closed the door, sighing before she spoke.
"Come on, Shemar. Can we just talk like adults for once?" Just once she wanted to have a serious conversation with her husband where he didn't twist
everything she said into some weird personal attack. She didn't want to attack him! She had been trying to raise a family with him for years
now. The problem was he had never been interested in that. If anyone wanted something Shemar didn't they got this. An overgrown man-child throwing a
temper tantrum for his way...And he still didn't get it so what was the point?!
"What happened in the kitchen with Koi? What was that about?"
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
He rolled his eyes at her line of questioning which, unsurprisingly, involved Koi. What about a drink in his hand in HIS bedroom made Fumie think that
Shemar was interested in talking about his knuckle-headed, idiot son? The answer should've been "nothing", yet...she was still pressing. Asking him to
talk like the adults they were for once. Really? They never spoke like adults. Mostly because she never allowed for that to happen! Most of the time,
if she wasn't bitching about what he wasn't doing, she was crying about what he was doing. And all that did was make him lash out when he got sick and
fucking tired of the two. And tonight, he was tired. Yet, she wasn't catching the damn hint. Throwing her another obvious clue to how uninterested he
was in talking to her about anything that involved what happened tonight, he began untying his tie, throwing it to the bed in frustration.
"Do you NOT see me taking my fucking clothes off?" The anger in his expression grew as he looked at her, pausing where he stood to see if she would
budge her ass out his door and let him drink himself to sleep. Not that he'd wanted to come home that night, but damn if he wasn't fucking irritated
that he hadn't schedule somewhere else to be.
"Okay..." He said, shaking his head as he realized she wasn't coming OFF IT. His fingers worked at the buttons of his shirt as he sat on the corner of
his bed, looking at his nagging ass wife.
"...since your ass is still here and obviously not leaving." He stopped fumbling at the buttons of his shirt as he pointed towards the door.
"That dumbass girl came in her tonight on everybody's nerves. I heard he and the little bitch arguing and when I walked in, she tried to start up with
me!" Yeah, so maybe that wasn't exactly what happened, but it was the damn gist! Koi had been going at it with her before Shemar had even gotten near
that kitchen and somehow, she thought she'd include Shemar in that shit? Fuck that.
"And I'll be damned if I let some fast ass come at me in my own house, Fumie."
Fumie would have given anything not to do this with him right now. She honestly hated speaking to him, listening to him complain about things that
weren't exactly the way he wanted them, or about how someone wasn't living up to his impossible standards. Shemar was just...impossible. He was
impossible to understand and it was impossible to get him to understand you. He would never see beyond his own selfishness to change his mind about
anything, so often Fumie found herself asking why she even tried with him...she didn't know for certain, but she was sure it all came back to her not
wanting her baby boy, a kid that used to be president of the Shemar Kidd fan club, got the chance to love his father like she never could. When Fumie
married Shemar everything changed for her. Her parents practically disowned her, neither of them had ever met their grandchildren, they hadn't spoken
to (or probably even about) Fumie in almost 20 years...She didn't want that for Koi. She didn't want it for Eri either. Family was going to matter to
her kids.
So here she was again, trying with Shemar. Asking him for his side of what had happened in the kitchen and doing everything in her power not to scoff
at the unbelievability of it all. Devyn had been fighting with Koi? Okay. Sure. Fumie could see that because Koi and Devyn fell out at least twice a
week. Most of the time it was over something completely childish and Koi would pout for a little bit and call her. Sometimes it was a little deeper
and Koi would be tense for about a week before the two of them patched things up. A fight was normal for them. Something abnormal? Devyn turning her
"anger" to Shemar. He was lying. She knew he was lying because Devyn was never truly angry with Koi. So how did that anger shift?
Fumie wasn't going to lie, she didn't know Devyn as well as she would like to. And she didn't often witness she and Koi's fights firsthand. After the
first kitchen incident, when Fumie mistook Devyn for one of Shemar's playmates (a memory that still made her cringe), any time she tried to sit down
and talk to her, Koi always pulled her away before they could really get going. So no, she didn't know the girl. What Fumie did know was her son. And
she knew what was best for him. Devyn was best for him. He got into ZERO trouble when they were together and he was...happy. Her little boy was
happy with her. Why wasn't that important to Shemar? All that registered with him was "some fast ass" coming at him...usually he liked that
kind of thing.
"Okay, Shemar-," Was it too much to ask for him to take the high road and not fight with a fucking teenager? Even if what he was saying was true...she
just...UGH! "I get it. She was disrespectful. Koi was disrespectful. Everyone owes the other person an apology...Call your son."
Fumie waited to see how that request would play out.
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
Wait. Was that...attitude? Shemar didn't know what he was picking up off of Fumie as she spoke to him, her voice taking on an air of irritation
and...something else. Her eyes seemed to roll as she gave him advice that he didn't even ASK her for. Apologize. Call your son. What? WHY? Because Koi
wasn't getting his way and that waste of time he was always with thought it was a good idea to stir the pot when NONE of that was even necessary?
Nope. That was FUMIE'S method of operating. Babying her son and cleaning up messes that weren't any of her fucking business. Shemar wasn't
taking the low road. Not for his son and not for his son's nosy, manipulative, money hungry ass girlfriend. Or whatever the hell she was. None of that
was Shemar's business and to be quite truthful, he didn't give a damn how either of them felt. This was HIS house and Koi knew what was up. If he
didn't like the way it operated, he could step. And he could take...that girl with him.
"And why the hell would I do that?" He asked Fumie, the anger in his face dulling as he stared at her. She looked at him again and...he saw the same
emotion he'd been seeing in her eyes for awhile. After their night together. Every time she'd even taken a moment to speak to him when they were in
each other's presence. And when she'd just walked through his bedroom door. Resign. The unmistakable look of "I really don't give a shit".
And if that was the truth, why'd she bring her ass in his room, telling him how to handle his home and HIS son. Yeah, that's right. Koi was his son,
too. Not his fucking little brother. And he didn't appreciate how she was coming to him like he was a child instead of the man of his home.
"Look, if you don't give a fuck about some little GIRL coming in here and disrespecting your house and your HUSBAND, then maybe you should check
yourself instead of coming in here and trying to check me!" He spat, taking his shirt off as he finally undid all of the buttons. He threw his shirt
near the bed, standing up again as he undid his belt.
Was it really so much for Shemar--a husband, father, and self-proclaimed adult--to get on the phone and call their son, the child in this situation,
to tell him that he was sorry about what happened? No. Fumie still hadn't gotten straight answer about what that was, but Shemar knew Koi was upset.
He knew the things Koi did when he was upset. The drinking, the drugs...the cutting. Fact of that matter was, Shemar Kidd didn't care about his son
beyond what he could do on a basketball court. Fumie firmly believed that if her baby did overdose one day and he died, Shemar would solely be upset
about the loss of his "legacy", not the loss of his son...She tried not to think about it too often.
"Why wouldn't you do it, Shemar? Nobody is asking you to do anything drastic." Why did she even try with him?! Every time they ended up right here
with her asking him to do simple shit and him refusing. "He was upset and you know how Koi gets. Just...please-," he cut her off, his voice raising as
the yelling started. He fumed about how Fumie didn't care about some random girl in her house disrespecting blah, blah, blah. Whatever. She crossed
her arms and let him finish, sighing as he did so.
"Stop yelling. Your other child is just down the hall and you don't need to be this hype about this." He really didn't. As usual Shemar was being a
drama queen and it was wearing on Fumie's nerves much faster than usual. "I'm not trying to check you, I'm trying to help this family. If you don't
care about your son don't call." Fumie shrugged then, turning her back on him as she made to leave.
Once again she would be trying to fix things herself.
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
What Shemar was REALLY trying to find out was when Fumie got the idea in her mind that she was running shit? Three times. He'd counted THREE TIMES
during that conversation that she'd taken the chance to tell him what he should or shouldn't be doing and he couldn't help but step outside of himself
and ask himself why he hadn't fucking slapped her back into her senses yet. She'd clearly lost them, voicing all of her unnecessary opinions on the
situation when it was obvious that Shemar just wanted to sleep. He just wanted...to sleep! Forgetting about Koi and that girl was the best thing for
him at the particular moment, but Fumie didn't see it that way, choosing THAT opportunity to become a much less funny version of Dr. Phil. And Shemar
didn't need a therapist. Sexy Filipino? Yes. Dr. Phil? Fuck outta here.
But he let her continue on, running her mouth about how he should check on Koi because...so WHAT?! His son was a druggie and he used that fucked up
habit as a substitution for his mother's titty because he obviously needed something to "make everything better" when all he had to do was deal with
shit like a man instead of running away like the little cunt Fumie'd raised him to be. So, no. Shemar wasn't going to check on his son who was
actually fucking legal now and was supposed to be man enough to jerk the leash on his bitch when she got too mouthy. Like how Fumie was getting right
now. But that was the difference, Shemar wasn't ignorant on how to control a mouth.
"What makes you fucking believe-," He began, pulling his belt from the belt loops in one motion before he stopped and held it at his side, starting at
Fumie. "...that I need to hear what you think?"
"Stop yelling?" Quicker than she probably expected, he advanced on her, pointing his finger at her face. "I'm not your addict ass son, Fumie. You
don't TELL me what I can or cannot do."
His stare didn't falter as he stood, chest to chest with her, the hand that held the belt at his side twitching as she met his eyes. He was tired of
this shit! Not that she'd been the ideal wife...like, ever, but lately? He couldn't stand her ass even more than usual! Since the night at Spago,
she'd been a extra kind of bold. Saying shit under her breath, giving him the idea that his presence wasn't wanted, and THIS. Treating him like he was
Koi's brother instead of his father. Like on top of "all the things she had to do" (whatever), raising him was another thing that she had to add to
her "long" list of responsibilities. Bullshit! He was done with all that. The new body, her new interest in her appearance, her exodus from "busted
ass ratchet" to "Mrs. Shemar Kidd"? All of that was supposed to start something new...fresh. Not this "even more naggy" that she'd been hitting him
with lately. And he didn't even want to get started with how she wouldn't even let him TOUCH her again. Yeah, he was bored with it and her. Especially
her fucking mouth...
"Help this family? You mean you coddle our druggie son and that retard of a daughter because you want to HELP? Or because you're a FUCKING HORRIBLE
MOTHER and they see right THROUGH YOU?" A sly smile crossed his face as the silence settled in between them, his words still lingering, heavily in the
air.
"I care by paying these fucking bills and keeping a roof over niggas heads. That's how I CARE. Fuck the rest of that shit, Fumie. At least I know my
damn role...when will know yours, Mommy?"
As usual, everything she said was an attack to him. She was challenging his authority. She was stepping outside her place. She was the enemy to him.
What had she asked of him so far? To make sure his son wasn't out killing himself and to stop yelling so that their daughter didn't hear them arguing.
She'd asked him to care about people other than himself and that was (as usual) too much for Shemar Kidd. And that was how they ended up here. With
Shemar in her face, telling her he wasn't a child, despite his contradictory behavior. Fumie instinctively stepped back as he advanced, belt in hand,
his features raging. She had been standing tall, trying to make him see what she saw...her demeanor changed and Fumie again she tried to explain
herself. She wasn't trying to check him! All she'd asked him to do was talk to his son!
Fumie tried leaving before this whole situation got anymore out of hand, risking a backhand for turning her back on him. She didn't want to do this!
Not with Eri down the hall! Not with Koi God knew where. She needed to take care of her kids. Above all of Shemar's bullshit, she needed to make sure
her babies (the ones she wasn't married to) were okay. His words stopped her from tending to them though. He'd turned his attention from her
shortcomings to their son's. Their daughter's. Words and phrases like "retard" and "druggie" leaving his lips so easily as if he were judging
homeless, foster children instead of his own. The shocked confusion on her face was clear as she faced him again trying her damnedest to process what
was happening. It was so surreal.
Here she stood, talking to the father of her children; the children he was currently referring to in such vile and ridiculous terms as if he knew them
at all. He didn't. Shemar didn't know shit about either of his kids. Outside of Koi's basketball games, Shemar took no interest in what his son was
doing. Did he know how Koi's grades had come up since he started hanging with Devyn? Did he realize that they hadn't had to pick him up from a drunk
tank in months? Did he see how often her son smiled and laughed these days? Of course he didn't. He was never here. And Eri actively hid from
him when he was around so Fumie honestly wasn't even sure if he knew what she looked like...It was almost laughable...It was laughable.
Despite every emotion inside her, Fumie laughed. It started small, a short giggle, but it couldn't be contained. She laughed at him. He was a fucking
joke. His complete existence was a cruel joke. The complete absurdity of the implication that he knew anything at all about the kids he
donated sperm to was maddening and Fumie could feel herself break.
"Are you fucking serious?" She swiped at her eyes, drying tears there as she watched him. He was. He was dead serious and he did not find her little
laugh attack amusing at all. The smile slid instantly from her lips as the anger of that realization overtook her. He was serious. This is what Shemar
thought of his own family. Of his FLESH. They were nothing more to him than problems.
"You arrogant bastard. You don't know shit about MY FUCKING CHILDREN! Don't you EVER IN YOUR FUCKING LIFE talk shit about them again Shemar. Or I
swear to God--" he didn't let her finish.
But then, she didn't expect him to.
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
![[*]](images/davis/default_icon.gif){kind=icon}
