The backyard...and a place for Pops to hide his whores...
Koi - 12-2-2012 at 03:58 PM
Smoke curled from his lips, the fragrance of the smoke reminding Koi exactly why he'd sat on that stash for as long as he had. His lips rounded,
letting go of three, perfectly circular O's. He smiled, leaning back on a pillow that lay on the over-sized chaise lounge, his legs over the side.
Fucking mind clearing heaven. This is what he and Devyn had needed all along. The entire evening, they'd been sitting on pins and rubbin' ass cheeks
with needles and all because...well, he really didn't know what was going on between them. The looks (more like "gazes" on his part) and shit were
enough...then they added a kiss to the equation, which fucked with Koi's brain even more than all that gazing did. Mainly because...he liked it. He
really fucking liked it, actually. More than he really should've, considering that they were doing the "friends" thing, per his request. And all this
fucking kissing and vibing was making him feel like the craziest, guiltiest, most selfish fucker on the planet. But the kush that was in the night air
was making everything confusing in his head seem like mist, fading away like the thick smoke that trailed from his lips and dissipated as it floated
towards the sky.
Lifting up his head a little, he glanced down at the foot of the chaise where Devyn was lying, her body balanced across the end of it. Her eyes were
closed as she lay there, on her back, but he knew it...she was thinking. What she was thinking about, he could've guessed...but she was definitely
deep in thought. She had been since they'd gotten outside. Without much more than two words, she rolled a thick one and they sparked, letting the weed
do most of the talking that they weren't really interested in doing. Because no one wanted to talk about what had just gone down in his living room.
No one. Not him and definitely not her as she'd been avoiding his eyes the entire time he watched her roll the blunt they were smoking. And he wasn't
talking about it because...because there wasn't really anything to discuss. Discussing anything that happened between them was too much like the type
of shit that happened in a relationship, not a friendship. So they could continue to avoid that shit with the most quietest of silences if that was
what it took. But Koi couldn't pretend that the avoiding was what had him a little shook as he sat there, watching Devyn's still body.
"Hey..." Leaning forward, he nudged her little, holding out the only thing that was making conversation between them, hoping that that brown
conversation starter would do its job. He offered it to her, watching as she took it from his fingers.
"We haven't talked all day, homie. And now that we can...we don't have shit to say?" Chuckling, he sat up, watching her for a response. Devyn - 12-2-2012 at 06:22 PM
She could hear him, inhaling as the fragrant smoke of the J they were splitting before he pushed the spoke from his lips again, the short puffs making
her sure he was pulling tricks. A night like this was pretty par for the course for the two of them. She and Koi chilling, toking...that was who they
were together...Or at least it had been before today. Today made things different. Neither of them wanted to admit that they were feeling...well hell,
she couldn’t put a name to it but, she knew they were both feeling something that they were avoiding talking about. Talking would mean they had to
admit things they weren’t ready for. It would mean they’d have to admit that things between them weren’t what anyone would call a friendship
anymore. They were more than that.
She had kind of known they were more than that before though; back when they had what they had on the couch of his living room, in the midst of a
party, in something that should’ve been chaos...it wasn’t. She remembered that night, even if he barely did. Nothing about them had been sloppy.
The kisses, his touch, hers...everything had been...slow Or maybe she was crazy and completely wrong about everything, maybe they were what
she thought they were that night; high and horny as all hell. Nothing more or less than--oh.
Koi’s nudge shook her from her thoughts. Her head turned to look at him and she did. Look at him, that was. He looked good tonight, his face dimly
illuminated by the lights from the house and those that lit the pool. She blinked, realizing she’d been staring as she took the blunt from him and
just held it. She didn’t really want it...She sighed, still quiet as she sat up, her eyes straight ahead as she tried to think of something to say.
She had plenty but, none of it was anything he was going to like.
“I think I should go-,” Devyn said finally, her eyes slowly meeting his as she offered him the blunt back. Eri was gone and the day was pretty
much over...it was time...before she did something else stupid. Koi - 12-2-2012 at 06:51 PM
The "hey" from Koi's lips, a bit of a sound to break the silence that had fallen between them, did the trick, as Devyn's head turned in his direction,
her eyes looking at him, not the blunt in his hand. There was something...missing there. Matter of fact, there was something missing in that entire
moment. Chiefin' together, just Devyn and him...alone, it had never been as...awkward as it was at that moment. When they were together, the
way that they were now, it was...they talked. They joked. The conversation didn't end. Everything got talked about. From Gambino to fucking Family
Guy, not one subject went untouched. But that night, they weren't touching on anything. Everything felt like a damn disconnect and as she looked
at him, her eyes searching his face like she was...he didn't want to think about it. He just wanted her to take the J, toke that shit, and be his
chick homie, like she had been before.
Hesitantly, she took it from his hand, the corner of his lip raising into a curious smile as he removed his suit jacket, his eyes still watching her.
Noticing her...still holding the blunt, not even raising it to her lips. Throwing the jacket to the side, Koi scooted closer to where she lay on the
chaise, her arm lying across her stomach where her shirt had risen up, giving him a peek of the skin underneath. Almost as if she sensed his new
closeness, she sighed, sitting up, her eyes on the still water in the pool. Or maybe the pool house had caught her attention. Or the night sky.
Whatever she was looking at, it was obvious that she wasn't looking at him. Wasn't talking to him...and he couldn't help but wonder...did she even
know he was still sitting there? Even as she started talking to him, her voice sounded empty, like the words were coming out and...
"What?" Narrowing his eyes as Devyn's met them, he shook his head slowly. She wanted to go home? Home? The fuck? The night wasn't even over. And...and
they still had half a blunt to go! And...she wanted to go home? That wasn't an option. They were hanging and she just up and wanted to...damn. The
fuck had changed? The day had gone pretty damn well, if Koi could say so himself. She'd enjoyed herself. His little babe was near 'bout in love with
Devyn and...and they'd had a good time, right? Up until...the kiss had everything been kosher. And now she wanted to go home?
"Why? Night's just getting started...and..." Koi looked down at her hand, refusing to take that blunt from her because if he did, it would mean that
she was through. That she could just up and go. That the night was over and...Koi wasn't ready for that. He wasn't ready for her exit. Not yet. Not
like this...
"...and what if I'm not ready for you to go yet?" With a smile, he nudged Devyn's arm and chuckled. "For real, what's up homie? You're not even
talking. You're usually fucking Socrates with a J in your hand. Fuck's up with that?" Devyn - 13-2-2012 at 04:55 PM
This wasn’t them. Usually she couldn’t get Koi to shut up about whatever subject the two of them deemed appropriate while they finished their J.
They could go on for hours about absolutely nothing, laughing and dicking around like everything was everything and nothing but the two of them
existed. She didn’t worry about her mom when she was with Koi, her father was the furthest thing from her mind, and unless they were actually
studying, schoolwork didn’t count for shit either. Those were the problems of tomorrow, shit she’d worry about later. With Koi, later didn’t
matter...or at least it hadn’t before. But now, with the kiss they’d shared, all she could think about was what was coming next. What it meant now
that they had shared a lip lock that neither of them could pretend didn’t mean anything. Where did they go from here? She didn’t know. Part of her
didn’t want to know. She knew Koi wasn’t one for relationships and it wasn’t like any of hers had ever ended well...ugh.
This was her dilemma. She wanted him...but she didn’t...but she did. She couldn’t sit here with him any longer, holding in all the things that
pressed against her lips screaming to get out. She liked him. She wanted him. She...had missed him. That had been the spark that started the fire when
they’d kissed. Her body missed his. The pull of his lips against hers, the grip of his hand on her hip as he held her in place while he tasted what
was his to have completely...Wait. What? Ugh! That was exactly what she was talking about! The fuck was that?! Koi was the homie, the bro. She
wasn’t supposed to be his, just like he wasn’t hers. She needed to get out of here. Just for the night. She needed to clear her head and
get her shit together because, she couldn’t keep thinking about Koi the way she was. It wasn’t going to work. He’d said so himself.
So why, then, did her heart break when she heard his confused ‘why’, his face covered by a puzzled expression waiting for the pieces of what she
was saying to fall into place. He didn’t want her to leave. They were still smoking and the night was still young. He didn’t understand and she
didn’t want to explain it. She didn’t know how to. She pulled her hand back, sure he wasn’t going to take the blunt as he spoke again, his words
questioning her the way his eyes had at first...but the words were deeper.
“Don’t do that-,” she said standing after he nudged her. Her tone was annoyed but she wasn’t. Not with Koi anyway. She was just trying to put
distance between herself and the conversation that was threatening to start without her consent. “Look, just take this-,” she said thrusting the
blunt back in his direction. “Enjoy but, I’m gonna be out. I’ve got...homework.” Lame. Extra fucking lame. That was a lame ass excuse
if she ever heard one and she knew he wasn’t going to buy that shit. Sighing she decided to do better...
“I really just don’t want to stay-,” she said slowly, her wrapping around her torso as her honey colored eyes found the ground. “I don’t
want to do something I’ll regret...something you’ll regret.”Koi - 13-2-2012 at 07:00 PM
Selfish? Yeah, a little. Flip that. He was selfish as fuck. Sometimes, when Koi looked outside of himself and really...glanced at the situation at
hand, he felt so damn selfish when it came to Devyn. He took all her time. They'd shared so much in the past couple of months that he really wasn't
sure what time they had spent apart. If it wasn't studying, they were chiefin'. If it wasn't chiefin', they were shootin' the shit with his boys. And
if it wasn't with his boys, it was just them...sitting in his room, fucking around with his Fender. Or laying on the hood of his car, silently
challenging each other's prowess with smoking tricks. But they had always been together, in his space...on his time. And he couldn't help but think
about all the things that she could've been giving up just to hang out with him, just to be "with him"...in the only way he would let her be. She
never talked about other friends (outside of her pussy ass cousin) and Koi couldn't even envision her hanging with anyone else because all her time
was spent with him. And it was definite that she didn't have a dude. If she did, there would've already been words between he and Koi with the way
they chilled. Other friends. A relationship. A relationship...all of that, she kind of missed out on, because of him. Not that Koi was asking her to
sacrifice everything else for him. She didn't owe him that and he didn't owe her shit either. There were no ties. No rings. No titles. And that was
the best way to keep it. Or that was the best way for Koi to keep it. Selfish...
Don't do that. Frowning, Koi watched Devyn get to her feet, her tone making his eyes narrow in confusion. What...the hell? And just like
that, from twenty to zero, his chick homie flipped the damn script. Actually, it really wasn't "twenty" with Devyn. It hadn't been twenty since they'd
left his living room for the backyard, her body distanced as soon as she sat on the chaise. Koi didn't think too much about it, not pressing the issue
since they'd just had a completely awkward moment together. But that was just it...they'd had it together. They were still a "they", as far as
friendship was concerned...right? Fucking wrong. That was what Devyn's actions were telling him, her body putting more distance in between them as she
stood there, irritation in her words.
"I don't want it." Shit...did Koi really hear his mouth say that? Had Koi Kidd just turned down a fat ass blunt for some building bullshit? Fuck yeah,
he had. Instead of taking it from Devyn's hand, he stared at it and then looked to her, his eyes cutting into her as she talked, a bull ass excuse
coming from her lips. Homework? Fuck that. They were on holiday break and when the hell did Devyn ever turn down a J for some fuck ass homework? Much
more, when did she ever turn him down for some fuck ass homework...
"You don't want to stay? The fuck did that happen, Dev? We're...we were having fun...right?" Were. Operative word. Were having fun. Before the kiss,
somewhere in between the gazes, the food, the presents...she'd been having fun. She'd been enjoying herself, her smile lighting up the whole damn room
with its warm glow. Now everything was going cold, her eyes avoiding his as he moved to the edge of the chaise, leaning forward on his elbows, just
staring at her as she spoke. She didn't want to do what? Something she'd regret? The fuck was she talking about? Koi couldn't even...fix in his
jumbled, disoriented head where all this shit was coming from. Left field sounded about right. Then again, there was the obvious. A kiss. Their kiss.
Something that both of them had been avoiding for so long and in just one moment, had welcomed back so willingly. They both had enjoyed it. He could
tell in the way her body pressed against his, how her moan seeped out from between her lips, slipping into her mouth like her warm, teasing tongue.
That fucking kiss...as good as it was, was screwing with her...and it was fucking with him...just as hard.
"You don't want to do...what're you talkin' right now?" Standing up, he looked at Devyn, hovered over her, his voice soft as he spoke. He didn't argue
with her. He wasn't about to start that dumb shit with her. She could get at it, but he wouldn't. Because something told him that arguing wouldn't do
shit except for give her more of a reason to just...leave. And she wasn't leaving. Not yet.
"Dude...I'm not getting you right now. It's not the kush. I swear it's not, man. I really don't get what you're...regret? The fuck, Dev? What would I
regret?"Devyn - 14-2-2012 at 07:51 PM
She was being the complete and total opposite of what she was supposed to be with Koi. Usually she was pretty interchangeable with one of the guys,
just maybe a little more fun to look at. She was supposed to be chill and easy enough to figure out should she not just say what she was thinking,
which was rare. Now though? She was being a little bitch about this whole thing. A full-blown female in the department of emotions and this was
not supposed to be happening. Hell, it had never happened before! She’d been with guys before Koi and she’d still never been one to hold her
tongue. She said what she was thinking whether she thought they would like it or not. Terrance? Sloppy kisser. She told him so and it was a problem at
first, but she trained him to do things with that tongue that went way beyond kisses. See? Proof that the truth made things better...So why couldn’t
she just tell Koi what she was feeling? That wasn’t the part she was confused about; she knew for a fact that she wanted Koi as more than a friend.
She’d know that when he suggested the friends thing after his apology in that empty classroom. What she didn’t know was what he was thinking about
the whole thing. She wasn’t sure what his reaction would be...but she shouldn’t have cared!
This was dangerous. His opinion of her was more important than it should have been and that was just another reason that she should leave before she
did or said something that completely fucked her over..because whether he could see it or not, being away from him now, would mean she could be
natural around him later....But he wasn’t letting her leave! Heaving an aggravated sigh she shook her hand a little for him to take the blunt from
her. He didn’t want it? Since when did that shit happen?! This was the perfect fucking J! Her eyes narrowed as she watched him, her hold on the
smoke becoming lighter before she let it drop. Fine. She didn’t want it either...fucking tragic...
She just couldn’t stay here! She knew he knew why so, why was he making her stay? And now he was mad at her, the curses coming before he asked the
ultimate question. We were having fun right? Damn. She stayed quiet, pulling her bottom lip in as her eyes looked at everything but
the person speaking to her. Sure she could admit to the day, that was easy. Eri was a treasure and she’d had a lot of fun with her but...Koi...Koi
had been different all day. He could pretend he hadn’t been sending signals if he wanted to but she had received every last one of them...and sent
back a few of her own; that kiss being the most obvious. Sure, they’d had fun but...was she willing to just be “fun” for Koi? That girl he’d
slept with the night of his party had been “fun”, so Derrick had so eloquently told her in the process of telling her it should have been
her...She wasn’t “that girl”. She wasn’t the girl guys just had “fun” with. Every guy she’d been with had been hers. Full on and
outright. They had been a couple and everyone knew what was what...Koi didn’t want that and Devyn wasn’t for “fun”.
She tuned back into what he was saying as he stood, coming to hover over her as he spoke softly, an immediate change from what she was sure would’ve
been a fight that ended in him telling her to man the fuck up and quit this feelings shit. But he hadn’t. He was being...sweet. He wanted to
understand what they would regret...
Without lifting her head her gaze shifted, falling on his face as she gave him a little bit of a side eye. Why now of all times would he choose not to
be a complete ass and yell at her like she was expecting? She couldn’t help the small smile that crept to her lips, as her head lifted, her hand
coming to the back of his neck before he could protest and pulling his lips to hers. Fuck it. Fuck it all. If he didn’t want her to leave she
wouldn’t go, but if he got what he wanted she damn sure was getting what she wanted...and shit was she. She heard herself whimper as her
tongue slipped into his mouth, her lips dancing against his as they kissed. This time it wasn’t her fault.
She said she wanted to leave.Koi - 15-2-2012 at 04:57 PM
Confusion was the theme of that night as once again, Koi was wrapped up in so much confusion that it felt like he was swaddled in that shit, the
complexities of it compressing around him so fucking tight...damn, he was too high for this shit. Elevation had set in during their unusual quiet
moment, passing the J between each other in the silence, and now that he was there, feeling what they'd just smoked, there was her voice, breaking
through all of that silence, talking some serious shit. She wanted to leave. She didn't want him to regret some nameless thing that hadn't even
happened. And as far as he knew, she was...shutting down. Like he'd never seen her do before. Yeah, they got in their fights, they cursed each
other out on occasion, but she'd never shut down on him. She'd never refused to look at him...until that night. What was up with her? The kiss, right?
Fuck. It was just...it was just a kiss! A kiss that made every nerve ending in Koi's body spark and set on fire, just from the touch of her lips.
And...and he could see exactly why she would be trippin' if it was about that. But the kiss had already happened. It had already made its appearance,
thanks to Eri, and it was over. And as much as he wanted to revisit it again, it was behind them with no chance of a reunion. What else was there?
What else had his chick homie bunchin' in the panties?
Looking down at her, his face contorted by his confusion, he searched hers for an answer, even if she wasn't giving him any eye contact. What had her
so damn would up, avoiding looking at him like he had some type of...growth coming out of his forehead. Koi couldn't ignore the fact that this just
wasn't her. Even though he'd seen her angry with him, remembering the pain from her anger more often than not. In laymen's terms, his balls
still hurt. But even with her kicking him like a football player puntin' a pigskin across the fucking field, there was something different in
this anger. In the cafeteria, she'd been defending herself from one of Koi's shittier come downs. That shit had almost made him swear off "X" for the
rest of his life. This time, it was different...even though he was sure Devyn was was still defending something...fighting to keep something from
him.
"Dev..." He called her name, standing there, staring at her. Waiting for her to just...stop with this bullshit and open up to him...something that she
hadn't really done since the moment they started hanging. Sure, he knew about her bitch ass cousin and her aunt. He knew about her life in KR, but
everything else? He didn't have a damn clue. She stayed so fucking closed off to him...not like he'd required her biography just to chill with her.
None of that had mattered before. Now, it was different. She was drawn. Her responses avoiding the issue in front of her. He wouldn't avoid it though,
his eyes staying on her as she finally looked up at the sound of her name. For a second, they just...connected. Her eyes scanned his face before a
small smirk broke on her lips. A soft smile broke on his lips too, mimicking her mysterious one.
"Wha-..." Koi began, his head tilting at the confusion that still existed, his question was interrupted by the hand on the back of his neck...by her
lips against hers. By her soft whimper as she pressed her mouth, roughly, against his, her tongue slipping between his lips. Shit. Pressing
his lips into hers, he returned it, threefold, his lips pulling at hers as his hands found her back, pushing her into him, fingers trailing down to
her waist like they were bookmarked there, waiting for the chance to visit again. This was what she was talking about? Something that he would regret?
How the fuck would he regret...this? Okay, what they were doing probably wasn't what most people would call a friendship. Friends didn't usually kiss
friends. And they sure as hell didn't have the thoughts that he had playing out in his head about friends, either. Thoughts that involved taking their
kiss further, which he wouldn't do. This kiss...it was...something that he'd wanted since they nearly got at each other at his party. No, he wasn't
thinking about regretting this. He didn't regret it at his party and he didn't regret it now. The only thing he did regret was...not kissing her again
as soon as they stepped into his backyard.Devyn - 19-2-2012 at 12:21 PM
She didn’t care. No piece of her cared what she and Koi called one another right at that particular moment. She didn’t want them to be
friends, or enemies, or acquaintances, or whatever. There were no titles attached to what they were about to do. Here. Next to his pool. As
she kissed him, one hand pulling him impossibly closer to her while the other rested on his chest, she knew where this was leading. The same place it
had been the night of his party, except this time there were no thirsy bitches just waiting for her to turn her back so that they could invite
themselves to her party. It was she and Koi, alone. And that was the way she’d wanted it from the beginning.
Devyn heard herself moan as his hands found her waist like they always did and all she could think was more. More tongue, more touching,
more...him. The last thing she wanted was to make things weird between them but, the second to last thing she wanted was for him to stop. She
never wanted to stop tasting him, and honestly...how bad could it be? What was a little sex between friends? It wasn’t like people stopped
associating with one another after sex...hell, speaking from experience, this could only make things better between them...right? Unless it was
bad...Nah, who the hell was she kidding. She’d gotten a taste the night of his party and tonight she was getting a lot more than that.
Her feet shifted, turning so that her back was to the chaise they had been sitting on before she’d started this. Their lips never disconnected as
she sat, Koi leaning over her as she laid back against the plush lounge. He would stop her if this wasn’t right, right? He’d say that something
like corny and they’d laugh off this kiss a lot easier than they had the other one, right? If this wasn’t what he wanted, he’d say they had to
stop and that she was right before and that she should leave and he would save them from themselves. That was the moment she was waiting for, that was
when she would tell herself to stop and she would pry herself away from him, away from this.
Until then, she would do as she pleased. The consequences of what this night could mean a distant thought. Koi - 20-2-2012 at 06:22 PM
There were two sides to every situation. Koi believed that. And the two sides were simple, drawn out so that there was no mistaking them. The right
thing and the wrong thing. Niggas liked to pretend that the choice was easy. Black was wrong and white was right, the decision easy enough to make
without facing a battle that ended up tearing you in two. In his life, there'd been a lot of confusion between the two. Koi wouldn't lie about that
shit, not like other dudes did. The right looked so wrong...so often. And the wrong just couldn't stop looking like shiny, verifiable "right". So much
so that he couldn't tell the difference...and a lot of the time, he didn't want to tell the fucking difference. Because the inside of him, it always
wanted to choose the opposite of correct. The opposite of white. The opposite of appropriate...the good. He was attracted to it. Anything
that went against the grain, that wasn't the norm, that wasn't would keep his name off of the eternal list of heaven shoe-ins, he was bound to do it.
It was like the need to do the hardest thing was etched in his damn skin. In his DNA or some shit...and that shit sounded more like right than
anything else did. Mostly because it sounded real familiar. And every time he thought that way about himself, the words his thoughts carried sounded
like the stupid shit that came out of his Pops' mouth. Words that gave up blame for anything. Words that put everything on everyone else...when he was
he one that should've been taking responsibility.
Would he take the blame for all of this? When this shit was over, where would he be? Blaming Devyn because he wanted to do wrong...again? Wrapped up
in Devyn the way he was, his head blanking out the feeling that was starting to spread all over him...like he was lowering himself into an ice cold
bath. A shit load of dread. The obvious common sense trying to get his damn attention so that he'd do the right thing and stop bullshitting with
Devyn. Because this was wrong...right? Devyn was his homie...for sure. He'd gotten close to her than he had anyone in a hella short of time and
considering the way they started out, it was a fucking miracle. She was cooler than most and...she was his friend. And now they were kissing? Touching
each other like friendship had never even crossed their minds? This shit was cray. What they were doing? This was...
Biting at Devyn's lip as his hands continued to pull her into him, he felt her moving back...felt her lowering herself onto the chaise where all of
this shit had begun. Full circle. Just like what was happening with them now. His body hovering over hers as she lay back on the lounge chair, her
hands still pulling at his neck..her lips pulling at his like they had the night of his party. His body beginning to respond...just the same. Blood
rushing, fingers tingling...the kush mixing with the high her body was causing as it lay beneath his. Brushing the loose fabric of her skirt over her
thighs, Koi's hands touched her thighs, the warmth of her skin heating his palms as he held on to her, parting her legs. There was no hesitance in the
way his body came to lie between them, his chest pressing against hers.
A low moan left his mouth, leaving her lips. His kiss trailing down her chin...her neck and turned into a soft suck as his mouth met her collar bone.
He loved the taste of her, loved the way her skin felt as his tongue caressed it. The thoughts he'd had about their friendship were a little quieter
now that he was touching her skin again. So quiet that in a few moments, he was sure they wouldn't even matter. He wouldn't give a fuck. Because as
good as she felt...as much as he wanted to keep touching her...as much as he'd thought about doing this from the very second she walked into his
house...none of this could be wrong. Not tonight.Devyn - 21-2-2012 at 11:14 AM
Right, wrong, indifferent; Devyn couldn’t bring herself to care which way was up as Koi kissed her, his tongue dancing against hers as if they’d
done this more than once before. They should have. Why had she let him talk her into a friendship that she knew she didn’t really want? Not that
their friendship wasn’t great, it was; Koi was her ace. Koi was her first enemy in Kapuhai Reef and amazingly enough he’d become her first friend
too. They’d spent countless hours together doing absolutely nothing and everytime she left him she found herself doing stupid shit like wondering
what he was doing without her and laughing to herself about whatever irrelevant topic they’d discussed that day...She should have known. She should
have known they’d end up here, his hand holding her hip as he hovered above her, her hands begging him to come closer as their kiss continued. Koi
and Devyn seemed to be the only ones that couldn’t see their friendship for what it was...lacking. Her friends noticed, constantly teasing her about
all the time she spent with him; his friends saw it too, the flirting near a minimum compared to the first time he brought her around; hell, even his
baby sister noticed and she’d only been around for a few hours! They weren’t supposed to be friends, they were supposed to be more...and the more
he touched her, the more clear it became to Devyn.
She moaned out, her back arching underneath him. Every inch of her body seemed to have been ignited by what they were sharing now, her skin flushing
as Koi quickly bit her lip, sucking on it before another moan fell into his mouth, a sharp sigh following as his hands met her thighs. One of her legs
fell around his waist as he parted them, pulling his hips to meet hers. She felt herself shiver a little as his lips left hers and it had less to do
with the soft breeze that caressed the two of them and more to do with the moan that came from him as his lips moved to her neck, his kiss turning to
a suck the lower he got. She couldn’t take this...
The hunger, her weakness, his teasing...Her hands slipped between them, undoing the buckle on his belt before pulling at his shirt to untuck
it. She let her fingers slip beneath the fabric of his v-neck and as his lips left her collarbone and began nipping at her neck, her nails lightly
raked over his back as hers arched once again. His name escaped her, mixed with a soft whimper of pleasure. God. Could they just do this
already? She was ready to beg for it, her bottom lip between her teeth biting back telling him just how weak he was making her. Instead she brought
one of her hands to his, moving it to her inner thigh. A silent request before her verbal one.
“Touch me, Koi-,” she sighed, licking her lips before her teeth caught her lower lip again, a moan become what was left of her request. He got the
gist anyway...Fuck...Koi - 21-2-2012 at 08:06 PM
The quiet was lush. The silence in between her moans and the sounds of their lips meeting, parting against each other...that was all Koi wanted to
hear. And that hush in between the sound was inviting, so much better than the voice of his lame ass conscious. Talking shit about how maybe this
wasn't were it was at...how maybe he and Devyn needed to cool it for a couple of seconds. Man, fuck all that. The wonderful thing about his Pops'
fucked up genes was that it was so easy to turn down the voice that was pleading in the back. The one that ruined all the damn fun. The one that spoke
a shit load of knowledge and said a lot of other shit that no one wanted to hear right now. That shit was on "min" and Devyn's moans were on
"max"...so tuning the voice of reason out wasn't too hard. Especially not with her body rolling underneath him, her chest lifting his with the
strength of her pleasure. His eyes closed in the intensity of it all...loving the way her leg hooked around his waist...and tightened every time his
lips touched her skin.
Pulling back, he felt her hand between them...and then on his belt, unfastening it quickly, her hand going inside of his shirt. He sucked in air
through his teeth when he felt her nails meet his skin, grazing at first and then pressing down lightly. Fuck, that drove him crazy. Her fingers, her
lips...her crying out for him. Saying his name. All of it...he loved how anxious she was...they were. How everything about that night was
like the night on his couch, her straddling his waist, her pulsing for him...he, throbbing for her. Good fucking fuck...it was insane. They wanted it
so bad and it'd taken this long for either of them to admit it again. Not with words, just the physical. Her whimpering moans. The way the tip of his
tongue was teasing the side of her neck. The way it turned into a suck all over again. It was the wanting her. The need for him. It said enough. And
when her hand moved his to the inside of her thigh...he didn't need to words that followed. He knew what she wanted. He'd known from her first moan
what she wanted because he wanted it too.
Nodding slowly against her neck, his nose brushing against her as he gave her a wordless answer to her request. He didn't hesitate. He didn't want to
play the tease game with her. If she wanted his fucking hands, she'd get them. And when she wanted more, she'd get that too. Brushing her skin, his
hand rubbed all the way to her warmth, following the heat like a fucking trail. And for no reason at all...he hesitated. Why...he didn't know. Because
he knew what she wanted. He knew what she needed...what his hands wanted to touch. What they'd wanted to feel from the second they got busy at his
party. But he was...slowing down? Yeah, slowing down. Not stopping.
Leaving Devyn's neck, Koi hovered over her again, his eyes meeting hers. Just watching her...looking at her face as she licked her lips...her teeth
catching the fullness there. And he watched her reaction...when his fingers pushed her panties aside and touched her...finally. His brow furrowed as
his fingers swam in her, rubbing there as he let them coat themselves in the wet she held between her legs. Pushing inside of her slowly, he lowered
his lips to hers for a moment, his fingers building a rhythm as he leaned against her...harder, held her down.
"I know this shit feels good..."He whispered against her lips. "But you're gonna wake the neighborhood up, Dev." Kissing her lips lightly, his pace
quickened as his head fell forward, meeting hers...his lips pressing against her forehead.Devyn - 22-2-2012 at 06:30 PM
Was it really that quiet out here? She felt like everything was amplified and she couldn’t hear anything over his breathing and her moans. It was
just the two of them, in this world they had created for themselves. She couldn’t remember; was it always like this? Not the sex. Obviously not the
sex but, when they were together they always did this, where it was just her and him and they were wrapped up in whatever the subject was. It was
never this intense though...was it? Couldn’t have been. It had to be the sex. It was clouding her senses, her memory, and her fucking judgement. She
knew this wasn’t right. She knew what she and Koi were supposed to be and she knew what doing this would make them but, she’d already decided that
she didn’t care. She didn’t care about their titles, she didn’t care about the after....all she cared about was right now. Here. With his hands
playing at her thighs while his lips sucked at her neck, surely leaving something she’d have to hide from her aunt before she got home.
Why did she feel like everything between them was so familiar? She felt like she and Koi had done this so many times before, his every touch just
light enough to have her on the verge of begging but, heavy enough to leave her skin hot wherever he touched. He wasn’t...the usual.
Nothing about Koi was like the other guys she’d been with. Most of them were all hands, groping and grabbing for whatever they could touch with no
regard for whether it was working for her or not; or, if she was lucky they cared a little and they were...meh, okay in the sack but, complete
assholes and with her for her father. Koi was none of those things...all the time. She could admit to him being an asshole every now and again but,
with him between her thighs like he was, she couldn’t figure out whether or not she saw that as a problem. She wasn’t sure about much of anything
right now but she knew she needed him to fucking touch her.
He nodded at her request, his hand trailing up her inner thigh as soon as the words left her lips. He was ready too. Anxious, fucking wired. She’d
known that a while ago honestly. Wasn’t much of a secret what with the tent his pants had pitched...All systems were...go? He stopped. She wasn’t
sure why but she felt it, the hesitation in his touch. Her body was writhing, her hips making soft circles below him, an ache forming and
begging to be dulled. Why was he--.
She gasped, her lips rounding, as he pushed two fingers into her painfully slow. Her moan was much louder this time, his name on the end of
it as he leaned into her again, his fingers sliding out as her hips rolled to push them in again, their bodies building a rhythm to the music they
were making. His lips touched hers but they didn’t kiss; he spoke instead. I know this shit feels good... She smirked. This cocky son of
a...he was right though. That shit was getting her hella right like no blunt ever would; even with the shit Koi rolled. His fingers had been the best
high she’d had thus far...What? What was he saying? Neighbors? Ha. She felt his fingers quicken, a short moan on her lips yet again as her fingers
dug deeper into his back.
“Baby, fuck your neighbors-,” she said just loud enough for him to hear. “I wanna see if you can get me screaming...” He was off to a
good start. Koi - 22-2-2012 at 08:26 PM
The whispers between them made Koi smile, especially Devyn's dirty mouth, telling him in a couple of choice words that she didn't care what his
neighbors thought. And real talk? Nor did he. His neighbors were mostly retirees, real old fogies with gray hair and hearing aids turned up too mother
fucking high. They heard everything. They heard roaches fart. And when Koi was partying, they heard everything then too. By now, the cops just stopped
coming when they called because very few fucks...if any were given when it came to Koi and how he partied and how his neighbors felt about
said partying. The real concern? Eri. His little babe was upstairs sleeping and just like his decrepit neighbors and their fucking, bionic
ass ears, she could hear...very well. Koi only used "the neighbors" because he didn't want to mention the name "Eri" to Devyn right now. He was pretty
damn sure that she was still mentally kicking her own ass for kissing him like that in front of his little sister. But damn, Koi couldn't even be
twisted about it. If it wasn't for that kiss, he wouldn't be deep inside of Devyn's secret, breaking the code to that shit like it was a mother
fucking National Treasure. She was too damn ready...and if experience taught him something...it was to make it happen. No waiting in this game. Even
if it meant getting it started out here and then finishing in his room, he'd do that shit. They weren't having a replay of the last time he had her in
this position, body calling to him...speaking his language like her body spoke fluent moan.
"Scream? Anybody can make you scream..." Again, his lips moved against hers, hesitating so that he could suck on her bottom lip quickly. Almost as if
his fingers were telling her accepted the challenge, he moved them quickly, his thumb circling her the swollen nub between her lips. Her body bucked
towards him, his smile growing until his teeth were showing. "...I'm aiming for 'speechless'..."
Pulling his lips away from hers, his kiss lowered to her neck again, a quick bite there before his mouth left her skin. He sat up, but he didn't stop
touching her, his free hand moving her skirt out the way, the side of her panties showing. He pulled at them softly, taking his other hand from her so
that he could remove them, her hips aiding him as she lifted her lower half from the chaise, her eyes watching as Koi lowered the only thing really
separating her from his full touch. They moved down her legs, over her ankles...over her boots. Koi pushed them underneath his leg, just in case she
needed access to them really quickly. In other words, if someone rolled up on them, those shits didn't need to be visible.
Biting his lip, his fingers with back to her as his body lowered to the side of the chaise, his hands steering her body, angling her with where he
knelt. Pushing her skirt further up her legs, he uncovered her. She came into full view and Koi couldn't even lie...his mouth about watered on the
spot. Opening her legs, his eyes connected with hers, even as he gave her another slow rub. Even as he lowered his head to her, kissing her lips
softly before he parted them, his mouth covering the tiny nub...his fingers going to work between her thighs. Devyn - 28-2-2012 at 02:22 PM
His neighbors? She knew now how he’d felt when she mentioned them getting arrested for trespassing. Who gave a dry fuck? His neighbors were
the last of her concerns, their opinion on what was happening in Koi’s backyard not even relevant to the moment. What was were the things they were
saying to one another, the way their hands were exploring each other’s bodies, the way his lips sucked against her neck...the way his fingers were
working her. Fuck the neighbors. The neighbors weren’t the ones that would be, a hopeful 7-inches deep in her in a minute. This was going to be
nothing like the last time they were together. His party had been a mistake that neither of them wanted to make again and Koi was taking all the
proper steps to make sure it didn’t. Saying all the right things...Anybody could make her scream? She begged to differ. She hadn’t met a man yet
that walked around with that much talent. Koi was already proving to be what she thought from the beginning. Different. She still couldn’t pinpoint
what it was that made her think that but, she was pretty sure he was putting his finger on it now, her hips bucking in reaction to his thumb playing
at her clit. Her breaths came in short gasps, his fingers still moving inside her as he finished whatever the hell he was say--speechless? Was that
right? She couldn’t help the smile that found her face as a giggle escaped her. She should’ve known he’d be like this. She wasn’t sure if he
was cocky or confident but she was sure she liked it.
She brought a hand to the back of his head as his kiss moved back to her neck again, before he sat up completely, his hand pushing her skirt higher
as he continued playing with her. He let her have just a little more fun before she felt him tugging at her boy shorts, his fingers slipping out of her as her hips rose to help him get them off. She liked watching him, watching her, his eyes trailing
over the skin that his fingers brushed pulling her panties down and then off completely, tucking them away. She didn’t know where he’d put them
and she honestly didn’t care. All that mattered was that they were off and Koi was on. Everything he was doing was so fucking right and
watching him kneel at the side of the chaise had her thinking that things were about to get so much better...
Pulling her to the edge of the lounge chair he spread her legs, opening her to him as his eyes found hers. The smirk on her face matched his as he
lowered his lips to hers, kissing her lightly before--Ahhhh. Her back arched off the chaise, both of her hands quickly coming to the back of
his head as a moan louder than the previous few escaped her, punctuated by a short stream of ‘fucks’. That was the only word that she could think
of to describe what she was feeling but, even that wasn’t strong enough. No where near it.
“Ooh, Koi-,” his name slipped from her lips as her body jerked a bit in response to his tongue. She didn’t have shit to say, she just wanted to
say his name. She wanted to scream it, her bottom lip tucked between her teeth keeping her relatively quiet. She was fine thinking of his neighbors if
it meant he wasn’t stopping. Not yet...Koi - 4-3-2012 at 05:53 PM
Devyn was really making it hard. Hard to care, that is...her back arching off of the lounge as her moans seeped from her body about as sweetly as the
taste between her thighs did. Her hands pressed at the back of Koi's head, pushing him further into her soft folds, asking for more without saying a
word. He let her push him in. He'd go as deep as she wanted him to...and without a single complaint. Koi Kidd? Diving right in that shit with no
complaints? That wasn't usually his style. Not like he was one of those one-second type guys who was on the look out for his own ass, not worrying
about what he was plowin' into. Or the type that sat in "the good" for less than an inhale before they were losing themselves all over the girl they
were with. That...was lame as fuck and he was not that dude. He got his...and in the process, the girl he was with got hers too...because he put in
work. But he didn't take demands. He didn't fuck that way...literally. He wasn't Burger King and random ass girls didn't get it their way because it
wasn't that type of party. Any girl he fucked could hit up the boyfriend she probably had for that type of shit. But that night...with Devyn? She was
saying all the right shit and...fuck...she was asking so nicely, her purr hitting his ears in all the right ways. The way her hands felt on
the back of his head, her fingertips grazing his skin through his low fade, her legs pushing against his hold as she tried to close her thighs against
the sensation he was making. She could have asked him for the world and he just might have lassoed the shit and brought it to her.
A quiet settled between them and Koi could tell that she was biting her lip to keep herself silent. Between the near-stifled moans and her quick
breaths, it was working. But in the muted sound, her body was talking the way her mouth couldn't. Her legs quivered underneath Koi's grasp, parting
easily as he pushed down harder on them, his body coming to hover over her. His mouth refused to leave her, his back bending as he lowered his head
more into her, teasing her with his lips as he rolled them over the swell between her lips. She...was so...good. The taste of her making him go a
bit...stupid in that shit. Turning tricks that he swore his mouth didn't even know HOW to do. But her body responded to them like they were second
nature. He couldn't do this much longer. If there was one thing he knew, waiting was what fucked them over the first time. Pretending like time was on
their side before reality came back in, crashing the party like KRPD. Pretty soon, one of them was going to stop the other. One of them was going to
remember that they were homies and that anything more wasn't a fucking possibility. One of them was going to be smart and...that shit was fucking
awesome.
Taking in her lips, he sucked on them, pulling at them before his hand left her thigh and his fingers found the inside of her again. His name. His
name just left her mouth and it sounded like...a fucking bird song or...damn. He lost himself with that one, his mouth growing hungrier for her,
especially when her body starting moving against his mouth, her hips moving in time with his fingers. She was getting close. And he was already there,
where all that fucking teasing was done and action was about to start. His other hand left her thigh as he found the clasp to his pants, moving the
buckle of his already unfastened belt aside. He pulled himself up, his entire body hovering over her as her legs closed around his sides, his loosened
pants falling from his waist as one of his knees wedged under one of her legs. He laid his body against her, lips meeting hers...and the imprint in
his boxer briefs meeting the warmth between her thighs. He moaned softly into her mouth as he pressed himself against her, his hardness pushing at her
through the fabric. This was the closest they'd ever been. Not chiefing, not shooting the shit...nothing had had them this close to each other.
Nothing had their moans synced, their hearts beating at the same speed, their bodies heating up with the same feverish hotness. Nothing they had
shared yet had had this this ready...
Sucking at her bottom lip, Koi's hand pulled at the side of his own underwear, his length still pressing against her through the cloth that separated
them. It wanted out. Koi wanted it out...and as soon as it was out...he was going to work. Fuck stopping. Fuck looking for a goddamn rubber. He just
wanted to go in real quick, get a quick taste and then they could go upstairs, wrap his shit up and he'd finish the job. Feeling the sudden freedom of
his boxers leaving him, he shuddered softly, his forehead touching hers as he guided himself to her and...
His body froze. His attention was divided that quick as his head shot up, his eyes staring at the house through the darkness. Moving his face from the
kisses that Devyn was placing on his chin, his eyes didn't leave the door leading to the backyard from the house. He'd seen it. The motion night
lights that came on whenever someone entered the kitchen at night. Eri was up. Pushing himself off of Devyn faster than he could explain, he
adjusted himself, fastening his pants as he hovered over her.
"Ah fuck. Get up. Dev...come on. You gotta get up, homie..." Devyn - 15-3-2012 at 01:45 PM
She could feel it in the tips of her fingers, the sensation he was making between her thighs reverberated through her entire body, her hushed whimpers
and sighs of pleasure the only sounds between them outside of the low moans that escaped Koi every so often. Why was it that the things that you knew
were wrong always felt so right? She and Koi shouldn’t have been here. They shouldn’t have been together in the way they were, his tongue rolling
over her like he was trying to see how many licks it’d take to get to the center of her tootsie pop while her hands scratched lightly over his fade,
practically begging him to continue. He was amazing. She wouldn’t dare tell him that, not with how big his head already was but, it was
truth. Pure, unadulterated truth that could not be denied. Just like she couldn’t deny him now, her mind’s quiet whispers of why this was so wrong
overpowered by the sound of her heart pulsing in her ears. The electricity Koi was sending through her body wouldn’t allow her to think in complete
sentences anyway so what was the point? They hadn’t properly fucked yet but she was on the verge of begging for it...if only she could speak...
She felt her body shiver as his hands pushed her legs further apart, his body rising to hover over hers as he somehow leaned deeper into her. She let
a short moan escape, her lip slipping from the hold her teeth had on it. Oops. It wasn’t as though she could take it back though and it
wasn’t like she wanted to. He liked that shit. She knew he did with the way he reacted, his tongue doing things she would do no justice in trying to
describe. She tried to quiet herself again but it was damn near impossible, her cries coming faster and growing increasingly louder as he continued,
his name falling from her lips in a stream, a sporadic curse or “oh” finding a place in said stream whenever she felt herself come close to
peaking. It happened pretty often. Especially as his fingers found the inside of her again, her hips beginning to move in time with them almost
immediately.
She was so close, one of her hands squeezing at her breast wishing more than anything that her shirt would simply evaporate. It wasn’t going to and
she wouldn’t dare ask him to move so she could get it off. She wasn’t as pressed to be without a shirt as she was for what was coming next, his
lips leaving her set below as his body rose to kiss her, her taste still on his tongue as their lips melded again, her arms encircling his neck as she
pulled him further into the kiss. A moan fell into his mouth as she felt his length press against her center. Why wasn’t he inside her yet?! She
couldn’t take it, “Fuck me-,” a breathless request to be taken. Right there. At that very moment. She didn’t care about any kind of title and
she gave a fuck about a rubber right about now, she just wanted Koi knocking the bottom out of her shit. She felt his hips shift and as his forehead
fell against hers she knew it was coming...right? Fuck. There was no time for this tease shit. The stalling might have been cute at the start of all
this but now was not the time again.
She tried calling his attention back, her lips placing soft kisses at his chin before he lifted up, pulling his face from her reach. The fuck? Before
she had time to ask he was...off her. Completely away from her and...was this fucker getting damn dressed?! And then he spoke. Ah fuck.
Get up. And then...homie. Devyn flinched, that word making the world entirely too real to fast. Homie. That what she was to him. Friend.
Ace. Buddy. She was the homie. Even after...FUCK! She sat up, her hand coming to pull at the hair tie that was now holing a lopsided bun, her eyes
cutting at Koi as she let her hair fall. She was pissed.
“What the fuck is your problem Koi?!”Koi - 18-3-2012 at 10:23 AM
A minute ago, nothing could've distracted Koi from what lay in between Devyn's thighs. Not hell, not brimstone...not even the Nike Mags, with the
automatic laces, handed to him by Michael J. fuckin'-Fox himself could've taken Koi's eyes, hands...body from her. Nothing was about to switch what
centered his attention...and she had him. Fully, their eyes connecting as he pressed against her, his lips still touching hers. Her moan streamed into
his mouth like the sweetest flavor. He tasted it. And he wasn't completely sure. Whether it was the weed or...or if it was just the moment, but he was
right there, readier than he'd ever been. So fucking ready that he could've broken a bottle with his shit. He was just that fuckin'...he was
ready. And she was, too. Koi could tell it in the way her body was almost melded to his, pressed up against him so hard that the shit hurt...but
in a good way. And he was pressed into her, nudging at her with his length, ready to be over the bullshit teasing. Ready to be over the small,
whispering voice that kept at him. Kept on that "Niggas in Paris" shit. This is cray, Koi. He didn't care. Why? Because they were best
friends? Because he was her homie and she was his? When did they ever make those rules? When did they lay down those guidelines? Nothing about this
had they discussed and as it stood, this is how they started! Her on his lap and him in her mouth and...this was the same thing, right? Then why did
it still feel kind of...grimey? Like the game they were playing was a hell of a lot more dangerous than either of them knew?
And as much as he wanted to pretend like that whispering voice didn't matter as much as the "Fuck me" Devyn sighed into his ear, he almost welcomed
that light coming on in the kitchen. The light that told him that Eri was about ten seconds from walking in on what was going on between he and Devyn.
The shit was so twisted. On one hand, he was kicking himself as he pulled away from the kisses on his chin...felt himself leave Devyn's warmth. But on
the other hand, he was almost...relieved. Happy. Glad that he hadn't had the chance to go farther than they already had.
Not even stopping at the sound of Devyn's words, the anger in them too fucking apparent, Koi looked at her for a second as she adjusted her bun, his
brow furrowing for a second before he looked back to the door of the kitchen. It would be moments before Eri opened the door to their patio and
Devyn's hair still looked like she'd run, head first, into a typhoon. The whole situation was fucked and the little attitude that was coming from her
didn't help either. But Koi could understand her anger. He definitely could because the blue ones in his pants were as pissed as she was. This was
twice. TWICE. The second time that they'd been about to get into something and been interrupted. This time they'd gotten farther...deeper. Deep enough
for him to be wearing a little bit of her on the tip of his joint. He'd been so close...and it was over again. She had the right to be angry...but
they didn't have time for a fight.
"Shhhh..." Quickly he pushed her aside on the chaise lounge, making room for himself. Sitting down, he turned her body and put her legs over his
lap...and the bulge that had yet to get the memo to "calm the fuck down". Catching Devyn's eyes, he bit his lip nervously and turned towards the patio
door as it opened... right on cue.
"Hey babe..." He said nonchalantly as Eri walked through the open door, her pajamas skewed and her curls a little messy. She had been sleep. Had they
woken her up? Had she heard them? Quietly, she looked at them, sniffing the air. Probably smelling the lingering kush. Fuck that. Koi would take that
anyday over his kid sister walking in on him inches deep in Devyn.Devyn - 24-3-2012 at 07:57 PM
She was sure he could read it all over her face. How had this happened? How had they come to the point where she was ready to punch him in his face
rather than have him bury it between her thighs a second time? Things were right...weren’t they? She was sure as hell enjoying herself and she
wasn’t shy about letting Koi know it...What changed? What happened between his lips kissing the ones below and her tasting herself on him to make
him stop? And so agonizingly close. She hated him right now. Beyond anything she was feeling, the confusion, the frustration...she was madder
than she ever had been with him and it wasn’t because they hadn’t finished. It was what he called her after...
Homie. Everything shattered with that word. The world they’d created for themselves were titles didn’t exist and they just...were? That
was gone as he labeled her what she knew herself to be before any of this started. She had been friendzoned. Before tonight she was sure that
shit like this only happened to nerds in teen movies who wanted someone who was super far out of their league but, now? Now she knew that that shit
was completely real and it was happening to her right now. Devyn and Koi were homies. They’d almost slept together but that didn’t mean
shit to him..and she had played herself thinking that it did. She thought...No. That was just it. She hadn’t “thought” at all. That first kiss
in the living room had had her in a place where her thoughts weren’t really made of much and the kiss that she started outside...nah. She hadn’t
thought about what the after would be but she didn’t think...homie. Maybe somewhere between that and...something else but, not homie.
She fingered her hair, pushing some of it back and some of it to the side so that it fell in an acceptable way with the waves the bun had left. Koi
was still trying to pull himself together and he had yet to answer her question. “Now is not the time to fucking igno--” he cut her off a quick
‘shhhh’ on his lips as he sat down beside her. Oh no the hell he didn’t...She was stunned. Too stunned to comment and too stunned to snatch away
when he placed her legs over his. What the fuck was going on?! She was in the twilight zone. A place where it was okay for Koi to turn her on, stop in
the middle, and basically tell her to shut the hell up about it. Wow...
She was going through too much. There were too many emotions attached to someone she wasn’t supposed to care this much about and she wasn’t ready
to deal with it but, before she could even think to get up and just leave, the patio door opened and she was faced with...Eri. Fuck. Koi said he put
her to sleep but, it seemed it didn’t stick. Fuck. Fuck! Had she heard them? Was that what had woken her up? God she hoped not; she had corrupted
that poor baby quite enough for tonight...and she was done.
“Hey, sugar-,” she said her voice falling into the light tone that she’d been using with Eri all day, a smile taking her lips, replacing the
look of complete and utter confusion that she had been staring at Koi with. “You alright, love?”Koi - 31-3-2012 at 06:42 PM
Thankfully, Devyn had caught on just in time, her voice light and no where near as weighted as her expression had been a moment before she greeted a
very sleepy and very curious Eri walking onto the patio, her bare feet padding noisily against the smooth stone circling the pool. Watching his baby
sister walk towards them, Koi couldn't help but steal a side glance at Devyn. He knew she was pissed as hell. The flash of disbelief and anger in her
eyes before Eri appeared kept replaying in his memory, but it was the disappointment there that had his stomach clenching a little more each time he
thought about what he'd seen. She didn't understand. That was what he was reading in her quick angered stare. What she didn't understand? Koi couldn't
put his finger on it, mostly because there was a lot of shit that was incomprehensible that night. For starters, why the fuck he'd stopped...again.
Again. Right in the middle of something that probably wasn't for them in the first place, he'd stopped. For good reason though as his little
sister had been steps away from seeing something that would've clearly scarred her for the rest of her life. But, that shit was...habitual now. Like,
whenever something popped off between the two of them, it always going to come to a halt. It would always be interrupted. Like it wasn't supposed to
happen in the first place. Like it was wrong and somebody up there knew the shit was wrong and threw a wrench in the game every time. Was it
wrong? Koi wasn't too sure. Because when he touched Devyn, it felt right and wrong...all at the same time. It felt damn good...made the hairs on every
inch of his skin stand up. But then...it felt like...if they carried on, there would be no coming back from where they'd end up.
But he didn't have time to think about what was right and wrong between he and Devyn. He didn't have a moment to even think about how she felt at the
moment as Eri walked to where he and Devyn sat. Her eyebrows wrinkled as she looked at him and Koi knew exactly why. She smelled the kush in the air.
The kush that she'd asked him (more like told him) to lay off of that night, just so that she could have a "substance free" holiday with her brother.
It wasn't a secret, though. Eri knew Koi chiefed. She saw the paraphernalia in his room and she was smart enough to deduce that his pipe wasn't for
blowing bubbles and his papers weren't for origami. But that's all she knew. Weed and that was all. He kept the harder shit out of the house because
Eri wasn't the only one keeping tabs of what Koi ingested.
"What are you guys doing?" Eri's voice mimicked the sound of their mother's voice when she was about to start on some rant that he really wasn't
trying to hear. As it stood, Devyn was already pissed at him. He could feel the tense in her body as she sat close to him, her legs still over his
lap. He couldn't take two of his girls at his throat that night, especially since the day had gone so well. It had almost started on a sour note with
his dad acting the dumb ass that he was, but it had taken a turn for the better, the moment that he'd just had with Devyn included. He couldn't let it
end on a sour note. Not that day. Not when Eri had probably had one of the best Christmases of her short life. And not when he'd had THE best
Christmas in his.
"I woke up and I couldn't find you. I thought you guys left and..." Her voice faded as Koi's soft smile wavered and fell, his hand reaching for Eri's
hand, pulling her closer to him as she spoke. He rubbed her arm as he looked up at her, his eyes saying the apologies that his mouth hadn't released
yet. He really hadn't meant to leave her in the house like that, by herself, no word on where he and Devyn were going...even if they'd only gone to
the backyard for some privacy and a smoke. He knew how Eri got when she was in that big ass house by herself and he knew how she felt when she woke up
alone. Even though it was rare, her being by herself, she didn't deal with it well and she shouldn't have had to. No one should've had to deal with
that shit...especially not him. But he had and he refused to let Eri's childhood be anything like his own.
"You know I'd never leave you here alone, babe." Reaching up, he ruffled her and smiled up at her. "Never. Ever. Ever." With each word, he poked her
in her side, finally getting a smile from her as she held the hand tightly. Slowly, he pulled her next to him on the lounger and wrapped his arm
around her shoulders, kissing her hair lightly. His other hand was where it had been the entire time, holding Devyn's legs in place on his lap.
Looking in her direction, his fingertips grazed her thigh as he looked in her eyes, mouthing the word "sorry", hoping that the anger in her eyes would
subside at his words.Devyn - 9-4-2012 at 06:20 AM
Eri. She had forgotten all about the poor baby, her mind more so stuck on Koi’s pants than his sister. Now though, she would force herself to
concentrate on Eri because thinking about Koi was sending her through too many things. She couldn’t believe she’d played herself again.
Again. For the second time. The first time had been different though. That was just sex and if he wanted it with someone else that was his
prerogative, but today? What had happened between them? That was more than sex...at least it had been to her but it was obvious Koi felt differently
when he found the nerve to call her what he had. Homie. Ugh. It hurt to even think about and what kept tripping her out about it...it
shouldn’t have mattered to her. That was indeed what she and Koi were to one another. She was his friend and he was hers, but in that brief moment,
where the two of them lost their heads and weren’t themselves? Those two people were more than just...”homies”.
But she couldn’t think that way in front of Eri. She couldn’t believe they had been mere seconds from scarring this poor girl for life, but here
they were, dressed and decent, pushing their emotions to the side to pretend they’d been chilling from jump. The skeptical look on her face told
Devyn that she wasn’t buying that for a second though. She knew her brother and his friend had been up to something she just hadn’t figured out
what yet. Oh, but she had no problem asking, her voice taking a questioning tone as she asked what they were doing. Devyn didn’t answer, she figured
Koi should and she’d just have to go with whatever lie he told her. That was fine. She was pretty much done talking for the night anyway. She should
have gone home when she said she was the first time. None of this would have happened and she and Koi wouldn’t be...here; confused about what they
were and not sure where they stood. Things were murky and it seemed Koi didn’t want to muddy the waters anymore as he didn’t lie to Eri either. Of
course, she didn’t really give him the chance, explaining why she was here before he could answer her question.
Awww. She was scared. Devyn could understand that; their house was huge and empty it had to be a little...creepy at night. Especially when you thought
you were alone. Devyn watched as Koi reached for her with one hand, the other still holding her legs in place over his lap, his excitement slowly
dying beneath them. He played the sweet role with her, falling easily into the big brother mode that had been making Devyn melt all day. She hated him
for that now. Hated that he could make her feel like this and she...couldn’t make him feel anything. Beyond lust, beyond “homie”, Devyn didn’t
make him feel any different about them...
Her thoughts were given pause as his fingers grazed her thigh and their eyes met. He offered a silent sorry, but Devyn didn’t know how to respond to
that. So she didn’t. She turned away, letting the silence linger a little longer as she tried to think of a way to get out of here as quickly as
possible without letting his baby sister see the tent his pants had pitched or her panties that were probably nearby but kind of missing...Devyn - 23-3-2014 at 06:44 AM
She was doing it. Today was the day and she was telling him.
She and Miyu had been over it 100 times this weekend. After Dev apologized for being completely shitty to her, Miyu came through like the friend Devyn
always knew she was. She knew exactly what she was going to say and how she was supposed to say it. Miyu had even bought the pregnancy test she’d
had in her bag for the last two days. Yes two days, because despite her preparation, she still didn’t feel brave enough to say fucking anything about this!
She had secretly been hoping for her period in the days between now and talking to Miyu so that she wouldn’t have to do this. But she needed to. Koi
needed to know in case she really was...She was telling him today.
In a nice change of pace, Koi was finally the one to open his front door so she didn’t have to awkwardly ask to speak to him, but she did have to
give a greeting that just oozed “we need to talk” trouble. His mother was having some kind of Kidd’s Kids meeting in the living room so they
made their way past that group, to his backyard, and then into the pool house. Far away from prying ears. Did he already know? He couldn’t. She’d
only told Miyu and she made it very clear that the burden was on Devyn to tell him what she was about to now. So he didn’t know. Yet. But he would
soon.
“It’s, uh...been a minute, huh?” It had. At least two weeks since she’d spoken proper words to him. And to happen right after the night of his
mother’s gala...She was sorry about that. It really wasn’t his fault, she was...it was complicated and it was about to get a hell of a lot more
so. Koi - 23-3-2014 at 08:55 AM
Seeing Devyn after so long was exactly how Koi expected it to be...a relief. Air. His chest had been in an eternal state of "tight" since
he'd gotten the text message from her that "they needed to talk", which hadn't been a good thing in the past and definitely didn't give him "warm
feelies" now. Even her face wasn't right when he'd opened the front door, hurrying her past his mother and the chairs of the foundation that had
gathered in the living room for a meeting. They didn't go upstairs to his bedroom as he knew how much his mother would've loved explaining that to the
foundation chairs. They passed the kitchen, excited out the patio doors and headed to the least of Koi's favorite places in his home...the pool
house.
In Koi's mind, that place came with it's own horror music. Namely because it was the only place in the house that was free territory for his dad's
"visitors"...which clearly meant whores. And it wasn't any place that Koi wanted to take Devyn to talk about...shit, he still didn't know what they
needed to talk about. But there wasn't a chance that he'd let it turn into some shouting match and have his mom's guests see anything but the perfect
facade she'd worked so hard to build. So...that meant the pool house was their only safe space...as long as they remembered to wipe down shit before
they sat on it.
"Yeah, you could say that." Koi muttered, responding to Devyn's small talk. She stood next to the door like she was trying to make some quick and in a
hurry exit as Koi sat on the back of overstuffed, white sofas.
"Why are you standing so far away from me?" He couldn't figure it out. There hadn't been anything that had gone wrong in the past couple of weeks. So
why were they acting like they were on the backside of some huge ass fight that didn't exist?
"Come here, bae."Devyn - 23-3-2014 at 09:17 AM
Devyn sighed. She was aiming to steady her breathing, but her chest had been tight since closing the pool house door behind them. She wasn’t ready.
There was no way around it anymore, but that didn’t make things any easier. It was the reason for the distance between them. Figurative and literal.
Why are you standing so far away from me? Because when they got close she stopped thinking. It had been the thing she loved most about being
with him...before it got them here. She didn’t need to be any closer to him to say what she had to say. She needed to stay right where she was
incase he went ahead and put her ass out after the news.
But she didn’t. She closed the distance between them, sliding between his legs, her arms falling around his neck as her lips found his for the first
time in weeks. She just needed a little support. A little encouragement. She wanted that from Koi...after he found out...She spoke as she broke the
kiss.
“I...I’ve been...avoiding you, kid.” Honesty. She was being nothing but honest right now and hoping he could handle that. “I’m sorry about
that…and there’s a reason.” Koi - 23-3-2014 at 10:05 AM
A look of confusion washed over Koi's face as he held Devyn's gaze...as she still hadn't moved towards him. Even after his white flag went up as a
peace offering, she stood where she was...refusing to budge. He wasn't angry at her! That's what his words meant. That was why he wanted her close to
him. He wanted her to know that the silence between them hadn't changed shit. If she'd needed a little time just to...whatever, he was cool with that!
He got it. Nothing changed the fact that when they made up, forgave each other and became what they were at that very moment, he meant that shit. He
meant what he'd said.
And he knew that she realized that when she finally moved, walking to him slowly. Her arms fell around his shoulders as his wrapped around her waist
and they kissed, his lips going to hers like he'd been missing her kiss for longer than a couple of weeks. His tongue slid between her lips as she
pushed away, ending the kiss that was never meant to get any deeper than it did. Koi didn't give a fuck. He'd touched her, she melded into him like
she always did. Nothing mattered again. Not her silence with him, not he and Derrick's conversation. Nothing.
"I don't care." Koi answered her, smiling as he pulled her close to begin the kiss again. She was avoiding him. Okay! He got it. She needed some time
to sort out "after gala". Though it took her a little bit to start acting...different...he was okay with her doing what she needed to do to get her
head straight about what was going on between them. Things had gotten damn deep that night. "No condom" deep. They'd shared a crazy, incredible
moment. And now, she was ready to get back to...
I'm sorry about that...and there's a reason.
"Whassup then? Talk to me." Koi said softly, the seriousness in the moment hitting him like a rock when he heard Devyn's words.Devyn - 23-3-2014 at 10:36 AM
He tasted like she remembered. She knew it was stupid to think anything would be different. It wasn’t as if years had passed or anything. It just
felt that way. She’d missed him. Dev probably hadn’t made it obvious, but avoiding Koi was just as much torture for her as it was for him. She
missed him every second of everyday they didn’t see one another. And she now that they were together? Ugh. Did she have to tell him? To ruin them?
She knew this was going to be the end of what the two of them had and it made her wonder. Was this the last kiss they would ever share?
No. It wasn’t. Koi made sure of that himself, his lips finding hers again after confessing her avoidance in the past weeks. I don’t care.
He didn’t care that they hadn’t spoken for real in what felt like forever. He didn’t care that a countless number of text messages had gone
ignored. All that mattered was that they were there now. They were together and that was all he cared about...It was enough to start the tears. She
wouldn’t let them fall, though. Not yet. She had more to say. And he was willing to listen. Devyn pulled back into her own space, her touch leaving
him as she took a step back. Distance. It was good for them right now. Necessary. Just until she said what she had to say.
“Babe...I’m...I’m late.”Koi - 23-3-2014 at 12:28 PM
Again, Devyn moved away from him...like being too close to him would keep her from saying everything that she had to say. Koi didn't agree with it,
but he let her slide away from him, the distance setting in that they'd had only moments before. Even though he'd said he didn't care...and he didn't,
that was truth...he couldn't help but feel his stomach lurch at the look on her face. She was...scared. Not nervous. Not angry. She was
actually terrified at something that needed to be said.
I'm late.
Fuck...
And there it was. The secret that had Devyn absent for the past two weeks. The thing that kept them from being who they always were. The fucking
elephant in the fucking room. She was late. Her period had gone AWOL as fuck and she...wait. Fuck. He didn't know what that meant. What the
HELL did that mean? Sex at the gala. Late ass period. His thoughts raced around the truth, skirting that mother fucker like he never wanted to hear
it...never wanted to realize it. Because nothing made sense to him. Not her silence, not even the tears rolling down her cheeks after she'd told him.
Not the deafening silence in the room. And it was crazy because everything sounded like white noise...and yet, he could still hear her calling his
name.
Koi...Koi?
"Yeah?" He answered, his head snapping up to look her in her face. He'd been holding his head, his body barely on balancing on the back of the sofa.
He didn't know how he was still sitting.
"...I-I heard you." He barely got out all of his words before he fell silent again, still trying to figure out what she meant, what THIS meant. No
period. Sex at the fucking gala. No condom. She was-
"So...you're pregnant?" Pregnant.Devyn - 23-3-2014 at 01:30 PM
The secret was out. And as Devyn watched all the color drain from his face she felt the first tear fall. This was it. She didn’t say anything as she
let the information sink in, probably consuming him the way it had when she’d realized the same thing. She was late. Late meant baby and even though
she still wasn’t 100% sure about being…the p-word, it was a real enough fear for her to worry about it. Now at least she wasn’t alone,
she guessed...or was she?
Devyn pulled herself from her thoughts, realizing Koi had yet to say anything to her. His position had changed, his hand coming to hold his head and
seemingly keeping him balanced on the back of that sofa. “K-Koi?” She called out to him, his name shaky on her lips. He didn’t respond and she
tried again. She shouldn’t have. She was pressuring him for a response to a secret even she had yet to really grasp. Late. God, how had
they gotten here? She fucking knew how. They’d been stupid. Careless and stupid. Careless and stupid and now she was late...maybe even…
...Pregnant? Devyn cringed at the word. She hadn’t spoken it for fear she would jinx herself. She didn’t want to be pregnant. She
didn’t want to be here. Telling him this.
“I don’t know. I’ve been scared to take the test-,” her voice was just above a whisper. She almost couldn’t hear herself over the sound of
Koi’s last word echoing in her head. I, um…-,” Devyn took a chance, taking a step closer to him as her hand reached for his. “I wanted you to
be with me when I did.” And all of a sudden, her mind stopped shouting “pregnant” and started begging him not to make her leave. She needed him
right now. He knew that and he’d made a promise.
He’d made a promise. Koi - 23-3-2014 at 03:01 PM
He didn't notice it, but he was holding his breath. Waiting. Seconds. Listening for the answer to the question that would change everything for him.
And for her. Shit...for them. Fucking Pregnant? Koi couldn't even ask himself how it had happened as he knew exactly the hell how it
had happened. Asking how he'd gotten his best friend pregnant was like a murderer asking god why the fuck he had gasoline drawers on and the elevator
he was getting on was set to "hell". It was obvious. They'd been stupid. If he hadn't been so scared shitless, he might've laughed. All that fuckin'
finally caught up with them. And now...this? Pregnant? Standing in the pool house that held most of his Pops' secrets and now holding one of his own?
Damn...
I don't know... Okay. She didn't know. A gush of air streamed from Koi's lips as he heard Devyn's answer. How the fuck was "not sure" better
than a yes? Shit, it was today. Because "not sure" meant that he would be buying a pregnancy test instead of definitely buying a cradle.
"Yeah, I feel you." Scared to take the test? He got that. Denial was easier than actually knowing whether they needed to start picking out names...or
planned parenthood clinics. Shit. Was that even an option...if Devyn was pregnant? Koi hadn't thought about it before. How he would respond if one of
his fuck sessions with the girls he'd been with before ended in something more permanent. He was always careful. He wore condoms AND pulled out. And
he would've fuckin' tossed a bitch down the stairs if it would've worked! Girls had tried that shit with him before, but he'd never had a reason to
believe them. Now, he did. He and Devyn were...different. He could count on ONE hand how many times they'd been careful. Sometimes they
forgot. Other times, they remembered but shit just started feeling too good. Now, he couldn't play denial as easy as he could before. This shit was
real. The possibility was real...and decisions that he wasn't even equipped to make would have to be made.
I wanted you to be with me when I did...
Looking up from his lap, his eyes met Devyn's, her hand stretched towards him. A look that he'd only seen a couple times before in her eyes.
Need. She needed him. She was freaked the fuck out and she needed him. He got that too. Mostly because he was in the same place. This shit
scared him. Not...babies, no. He knew about the "birds and the bees" shit. He knew what going into a female raw meant. He just didn't think this would
happen now. Not now. They were seniors. They were starting their lives. They were graduating. And more importantly...They weren't together
They were two friends that fucked up and possibly made a baby. The fuck were they supposed to do with that?
"I-..." He started, his eyes still looking at her hand, which meant way more than support at the moment.
"Yeah." He said, finally reaching out and grabbing her hand. He pulled her to him, his arms wrapping around her waist again. This time, he held her
tighter as she lay in his arms. Pulled her to his chest a little firmer. Tried to find the strenght for both of them to do what they never thought
they'd be doing at eighteen. Devyn - 23-3-2014 at 04:16 PM
Koi’s sigh of relief was contagious. Who would have thought “I don’t know” would have been an answer that elicited feelings of relief? In this
situation it was. Hell, “I don’t know” was better than “yup, it’s yours” anyday. But Devyn wasn’t relieved because of her uncertainty.
She was relieved because he was still here. Koi hadn’t gotten up and walked away. He hadn’t left her to deal with this shit on her own...he
felt her. He was still here. Devyn felt the corners of her lips pull a little at the thought. She couldn’t smile about anything though. Not
until she was sure there was something to really smile about. Not until she knew they wouldn’t be trying to write term papers in between diaper
changes. Fuck.
They were 18. Eighteen. Neither one of them was ready to handle a baby. Sure, Koi was amazing with Eri, but that by no means made him a father. And
Devyn? She loved kids. Kids that weren’t hers. She couldn’t be pregnant. She couldn’t be...they were going to find out for sure
today. Together. She had waited for him. When Miyu gave her the test she had offered to wait while she took it. Devyn told her she couldn’t do it
without Koi and she couldn’t. She didn’t want to. Still didn’t. And she was hoping he didn’t want her to go it alone either.
But her hand had been outstretched for a minute now and he was just...looking at it. He did try to speak but his words caught and nothing came. He
just kept staring...and she still hadn’t put her hand down. She wasn’t going to. Hours could pass. Days. And she wasn’t pulling away from him.
Whatever the outcome, the two of them had made a promise to one another and she wasn’t letting that go. She was here. He should be too…And he was,
a short “yeah” leaving his lips before he pulled her into him. Devyn heard herself whimper into his shirt as she nuzzled even closer. He was here.
The one man in her life who had every reason to run and he stayed. He had her.
“Thank you-,” She whispered it between tears, but that didn’t mean she meant it any less. He was still here and she was grateful. Koi - 25-3-2014 at 03:06 PM
___________________________________
There was something about the silence between them as they sat together in the master bedroom of the pool house...staring at nothing, really. Thinking
about everything. They hadn't really said much as the seconds slowly ticked by since Devyn had come out the the bathroom, holding that little white
stick. That fucking stick said it all. It predicted the future. And in the next couple of minutes, it would predict theirs. And Koi still hadn't
figured out if he was ready for what it had to say. Pregnant or not pregnant. Bound to each other by something that they both could've
controlled or...or...free. Well, as free as they could be with something like this in their memory banks. A fucking pregnancy, whether real or
assumed, was something you didn't forget. And Koi never meant for any of this to fucking happen. He was just...they were just having fun.
Shit. And now they were having this. No conversation. No eye contact. Just the silence. And their thoughts.
Koi softly cleared his throat, making the only noise he'd heard in what felt like an hour. His mouth was dry as a damn desert, but water didn't seem
all that important when the next step of his life was counting down on the round wall clock that was hanging over the king sized bed he was sitting on
the end of...next to Devyn. She hadn't moved since she'd laid the test stick on the dresser and took a silent seat next to him. He couldn't help but
sneak a glance at her out of the corner of his eye. Her eyes were wide open, her thoughts probably on display once you looked into them. She took
shallow breaths...when Koi could tell she was breathing. Sometimes it felt like she forgot, her shaky, deep inhales telling that story. Koi bit his
cheek at the sight, his stomach twisting at how stressed she looked. Feeling guilty because he knew it was his fault. Feeling guilty because...he
hadn't done better by her.
"How long?" He asked, his voice soft and strained. "How long did the test say it would take to show results?" A dumb question with an obvious answer.
They'd read the instructions together. But Koi just wanted the silence to stop. it was selfish as fuck but...he just wanted to hear her voice.Devyn - 25-3-2014 at 04:44 PM
In…out...in...out…Every now and again Devyn reminded herself to breathe. Her thoughts were running in so many directions and none of them
were coming up with what she would say to Koi if they found out they were going to be parents. They...Gah! How did she let this happen?! Miyu was
right. She had been so stupid! Countless times she’d let Koi not only raw her, but come inside her. Hell, once or twice she’d even asked
him for it! What the fuck was wrong with her? How did she put herself in this situation? More importantly...how could she put Koi in this situation?
She felt the worst about that. She knew this was the furthest from what he wanted. Over and over while she was peeing on that little white stick, her
brain replaying Koi’s voice at Surfside ...I kinda like this friend thing we're doing. You're good too, right? She wasn’t then...she was
even less so now…
Devyn jumped a bit as Koi cleared his throat, the first sound she had heard from him in the eternal minutes the two of them were sharing as they
waited. It felt...odd. The two of them on a bed and neither of them interested in testing the frame. Things were so...heavy. It was never like this
with them. They were “friends”. They had fun.This was the beginning of a change. There would be no more fun and they probably wouldn’t be
friends either. She’d seen 16 and Pregnant. Those relationships never lasted. Devyn would nag him about stupid shit or start an unnecessary fight
like she usually did, and he would grow tired of her. She was going to have Koi’s kid and he was eventually going to dip out like everyone else...he
would leave…
She could hear him saying something, but his words hadn’t come into focus yet. Devyn was shaking her head no as Koi repeated what she assumed had
been his question. How long would it take? She didn’t know. She couldn’t remember. Yeah, the two of them had read the box together but that seemed
like hours ago…
“It doesn’t matter-,” Devyn heard herself speak as she stood up, a weird kind of energy filling her body. Her voice was back and she was
probably much louder than she meant to be, but she couldn’t change that, “I’m not pregnant. I CAN’T be pregnant, Koi.” She was pacing. Had
she always been this hot? When did anybody turn the volume up on that ticking ass clock?! She stopped, her eyes finding his.
“This isn’t happening to us. We’re going to be fine.” Koi - 4-4-2014 at 04:59 PM
We're going to be fine.
Would they? They were teenagers. Kids. They didn't know shit about SHIT. At least Koi didn't. So what the hell was he going to do with a
fucking kid? "I CAN'T be pregnant." Ha. He couldn't help wishing that it was that simple. Wishing for an un-pregnancy didn't make it
disappear. If she was, she was. Plain and simple. Whether Devyn wished upon a star or not. This wasn't a damn Disney movie. There didn't have to be a
happy ending for either of them, no matter how much they wanted there to be one. This was reality and it was harsh, cold...fucked. The real
question wasn't what they would do if shit turned out to be positive. The question was would they survive it?
Would they last? That was the part that Koi didn't know anything about. It's what made his throat dry enough with nervousness to have him
mute for the remainder of his damn life. Regardless what the answer on the stick was, what would happen to he and Devyn? Koi had seen it before. When
girls started having conversations like "I'm late..." or "I went to the doctor and...", things got...real. Uncomfortably real. And they
were...friends. Just friends. Hell, Koi knew couples that went through this type of shit and they didn't make it! So what would happen to he
and Devyn? This was over their heads and it added more intense shit to a situation that was already way too complicated to begin with. Koi could admit
that. They had almost figured everything out and gotten to a place where "complicated" started looking a whole lot like "normal". And now this? Devyn
possibly pregnant? It threw more into the situation to deal with. Because it wasn't just "fuck what everyone thinks, it's just us..." anymore. Not if
Devyn was pregnant. "Pregnancy" meant at the very least, one extra person was joining their fucked up situation...
Koi sighed as Devyn spoke, her voice rising an octave from the nervous energy coursing through it. She wanted to believe what she was telling herself,
he knew it. Hey, he wanted to believe it. Maybe more than she did. Because nothing was more devastating to him than making her a mother before she was
ready to be one. Nothing. And he was pretty sure that he wasn't "daddy" material, either. Especially not with the non-example setting asshole he had
for one. He hated his father...so much. But the funny thing? As much as Koi hated him, he couldn't stop mirroring Shemar Kidd's mistakes.
"Hey." He muttered, watching Devyn continue to pace. She was making his already muddled head, heavy. Dizzy. He caught her hand as she crossed his path
again, her body jerking towards him as he pulled her to the bed beside him.
"Sit. You're not doing anything but working yourself up." Devyn - 4-4-2014 at 05:54 PM
We’re going to be fine.
They were. They were going to be okay. She would look at that stick in a minute and she would see that she had been all worked up over nothing. That
she didn’t have to come over here and tell him anything. That she was stressed and tired and it was fucking with her cycle in the worst way
possible. They were going to be fine. She wouldn’t accept her life any other way. She had not gotten away from everything that was wrong in her life
to come here and fuck it up...Shit. Shit! She was her mother. She was turning into her unwed teenage pregnancy ass mother. She couldn’t fucking
breathe.
Devyn had taken to pacing again, her thoughts running in a direction that they hadn’t previously. Her family...but more importantly, the fact that
Koi didn’t know any of her family. Sure, he knew Athena and Carter, but he didn’t know her nuclear. He didn’t know her, really. She had
a brother. Had she ever told him that? Had he ever asked? And what about her dad? Koi didn’t know shit all about her father and if she had anything
to do with it, he never would. He would never know about any of it...Was that okay? Was it cool for her to have a baby with a guy who didn’t know
anything about her beyond what the inside of her thighs tasted like?
What was she saying? That wasn’t completely true...was it? Koi knew her well enough. He knew what made her laugh and the things he shouldn’t say.
He knew about what happened to her mom and he knew first hand how she’d reacted. Koi knew her. He knew her like she knew him. And if she thought
about it, she knew him so well because they lived a similar life. He’d picked that up on Valentine’s day. Shit home lives, made that way by even
shittier fathers. He knew her. He knew enough...didn’t he? Damn it! She wasn’t sure about anything right now. All she knew was that she
couldn’t be pregnant and that they were going to be fine...And that she was the only one that was really “worked up” about this.
Her thoughts were halted as Koi’s hand found her wrist and pulled her back to bed. She sat, fighting the urge to stand again. How was he so calm? So
fucking even?! Koi hadn’t stopped talking all soft at her since she told him. This wasn’t shit a normal guy would have been as calm about. She
might be having a kid. His kid. That didn’t scare him shitless?
“Looks like I’m the only one-,” she replied, her words having a little more bite than she meant them to. She shook her head clear. She hadn’t
meant that. She was sure he was freaking out too. He was trying. As usual, Koi was being a good guy and she was being a complete bitch to him. Her
feelings weren’t the only ones that mattered here and in the whole time they’d been in that pool house she hadn’t one asked him about them.
“I’m sorry kid. I didn’t mean that…” Her hand found his and their fingers intertwined. “I’m on edge a little bit, bae and I haven’t
even asked how you’re...are you okay?”Koi - 5-4-2014 at 07:31 AM
Really? Koi's brow furrowed at Devyn's quick, irritated rebuttal. She was the only one in this situation getting worked up? Not fucking
likely. Did she not get what this situation meant? Of course she did. She was pacing a moat in the plush carpet that lined the bedroom floor. And
whether she believed it or not, Koi would've been pacing a goddamn canyon right along with her if it wasn't for the...guilt. The guilt had him stuck
to the side of the bed like a statue. All he could do was stare...and blink when his eyes got blurry. And stare again. And think. His thoughts were
the worst and honestly? He could've done without them. This, in some way, was entirely his fault. Devyn looking like she was a second away from a
stroke. Messing her fucking life because he wanted what he wanted. Not even giving her what she wanted and making her settle for less for reasons that
she didn't even really understand. Koi wasn't blind to the shit he was doing. He knew. And that guilt made him root to the spot while she felt
everything, showed everything she was feeling. Koi didn't...because he didn't think he deserved to feel shit. He couldn't panic. He couldn't cry. He
couldn't count his breaths. He had to keep her grounded because all of this shit here? His fault. You don't get to feel the world crumble when you're
the one stomping on it.
"Devyn..." He said, his voice breaking through the quiet after her words. He looked up at her with the pain from her words etched across his face. He
didn't blame her for what he said. His "collected front" was probably annoying the shit out of her in ways he couldn't understand. But her words still
hurt. And she knew they did, her apology coming after he called her name.
"Yeah...you did." He nodded his head before he looked at his lap again. "You meant it. It's okay." Her hand touched his and he immediately let her
fingers fall in between his.
"I'm..." He started, his words falling into another silence. He didn't think it mattered how he felt. He felt like shit. He felt like he didn't
deserve her concern. He felt like...
"...fine. I'm fine." Devyn - 5-4-2014 at 04:22 PM
She was already doing it. She was pushing him away and they weren’t even sure about the kid yet. They could not have this baby. If it was real and
she was pregnant, a baby was going to rip them apart. It already was. Devyn frowned, regretting her words as soon as she heard them leave her
mouth. She wasn’t even sure why she said it. Yeah, him acting like this didn’t phase him was pissing her clean off. Especially because it was
making her feel like she was a nut for being afraid, but surely Koi was in this panic boat with her. He was no more ready than she was, but he was
being...the only level headed one in the room. She was so fucking immature. Yet another reason she wasn’t ready to be anybody’s mother.
She heard Koi call her name and saw the hurt in his face as she apologized. She hadn’t meant to do that. She wasn’t trying to make him feel like
the level of shit she felt like for doing this to him in the first place. “I didn’t mean it, babe. I swear I didn’t-,” She could see he
wasn’t as strong as he was pretending to be. Pretending for her. Something she hadn’t even bothered to take note of because she was so into her
own selfish feelings. That ended now.
Devyn asked about how he was doing and listened as Koi struggled to lie to her. Fine? He was fine? Really? Devyn sighed as the reason why he was lying
threatened to slap her across the face. It’d been a whisper in the back of her mind since she told him, but she had been extremely selfish. Koi
needed her too. She had pretended that she was the only one feeling this, but that was bullshit. Koi was struggling with it too…
“Kid you don’t have to do that. You’re not fine...At least, you shouldn’t be…-” she paused her words catching in her throat. She should
have gotten this out already. He should have already known. “I’m tripping you up...You’re being scouted and you have shit going for you and here
I am fucking tripping you up. I’m so sorry Koi...I didn’t meant it…”
She really didn’t mean for any of this. Koi - 7-4-2014 at 07:33 AM
I'm fine. That was it. That was all Koi had to say about the situation. Even if it wasn't true and even though he was cracking apart faster
than he could keep the damn pieces of himself together...he was fine. He would be fine for her. He would keep telling himself for the seconds that
they sat there together, waiting for that damn stick to predict the rest of their lives that he was "okay". And no matter what it said, he'd hold it
together...for her. He'd do the shit for her that he never could before. Think about her first. He'd do what he needed to do for her because
he owed it to her. If that meant being the strongest thing in the room while she lost it for a moment, he could do that. Just as long as it meant that
this guilty weight on his chest would...go away. But he knew it wouldn't. No matter what the stick said, the guilt was there to stay. I had been there
for awhile, in the background. While the sex was good and the time they spent together as "friends" was what he wanted, he still felt...off about it.
And the conversation with Derrick let him know why. Shit had gotten "emotional". It'd gotten deep. It wasn't just about being inside of her anymore.
It wasn't about having the best of both worlds and feeling like "hot shit" because he got one of the baddest girls at King's...shit, on of the baddest
PERIOD, to let him have her with no strings attached. Not anymore. They had secrets now. They'd been through things together and it wasn't superficial
anymore. There was nothing surface about holding someone after their mother died. Or them holding you after your empty, oblivious mother turns you
away for the hundredth time so she can keep being numb and ignore your pain. Or you're sitting next to each other, waiting to know what the rest of
your lives will be like. No. it wasn't superficial anymore. And that...made the guilt and the fear eat away at Koi like never before.
You're not fine... With a deep sigh, he shook his head and pulled his hand away from hers. Of course he wasn't. She...fuck, they might have
been pregnant. And the clock was ticking away at their futures, laughing at them because of how stupid they'd let themselves be. They had too much
time. Too much time to sit and think about the shit they should've done. About the shit that should've been important while they were too busy fucking
each other? Why hadn't he strapped up? Why had she let him raw her as many times as she had? Why didn't he ask her if she was on the pill? Why hadn't
they cared enough to know that THIS would happen when he stayed cummin' inside of her like she was "wifey". But there would never be a "wifey"
because...fuck. All these damn...thoughts. No. He wasn't "fine".
"Don't..." He interrupted her apology. Was she really doing that? Was she taking the blame? No. HE was being scouted? HE had an entire life in front
of himself? Fuck that! She had shit to look forward to! Devyn had so many scholarships coming her way that Koi'd lost count. She was smart. Like
"smart" smart. The shit she said to him had him thrown sometimes. And she wanted more than to be pregnant in her prom dress. She wanted to go to
prom. She wanted that cap and gown. And all Koi did was fuck that up for her.
"...don't do that. Don't sit here and act like you don't have shit going for you, too." He put his face in his hands again, another sigh escaping
him.
"Don't apologize to me. Don't do that."Devyn - 7-4-2014 at 02:02 PM
He didn’t have to lie to her. It was okay for him to not be fine. She wasn’t either. She was barely keeping it together, a fact she was sure
she’d made obvious with her pacing and ridiculous outbursts. She was just feeling so many things at once she didn’t know how to keep most of them
in. She was angry and disappointed in herself. So fucking disappointed. She never should have let this happen. Koi had made himself completely clear
when they started all this how he felt and would always feel about “them”. There wasn’t a “them” outside of their friendship. There wasn’t
a “them” that was supposed to be making decisions like blue wallpaper or pink in the nursery. They weren’t and never would be a couple. It was a
fact Devyn told herself she was fine with...Looked like the both of them were lying about being fine…
Dev called him on it, frowning as he pulled his hand away from hers. She just wanted him to know that this wasn’t totally on him. She wanted him to
know that she knew how big her fuck up was. There was no reason she shouldn’t have demanded he strap up. There was no reason she should have been
letting him come inside of her. Sure, he could have wanted these things for himself, but he was a man. Devyn didn’t blame him...She blamed herself.
And all she wanted to do was apologize for it. She was tripping him up. The kid liked to think he was the ultimate fuck up, but if there was
one thing he knew, it was basketball. He was good at it. So good that people took note. The kid had a full ride to any Division 1 school of his choice
off talent alone. Sure, Dev helped keep him from falling below a C in most classes, but they both knew that wouldn’t matter for shit. He was going
pro. It was just a matter of time. If Devyn was pregnant, there were so many other matters he’d have to consider before taking any offers. She
didn’t want that.
Koi had been stuck for too long. Stuck with his shitty parents. Stuck listening to his da pump his head full of bullshit. He was graduating. He had an
out…She was tripping him up. It was a thought that made her want to cry every time it came to her. She was tripping Koi up with this
completely avoidable bullshit and she was...sorry. Everything in her wanted him to know that she hadn’t done this on purpose. Sure, there were other
girls that knew his future too. They would have done some shit like this on purpose...Devyn wasn’t doing that. The guilt she was feeling over this
was threatening to crush her and the only way she could think to get rid of it was to apologize for doing this to him. He didn’t want to hear it.
She sighed as he did, standing again. She wasn’t trying to fight with him and that’s what this was about to turn into. She wouldn’t say
anything. She was just going to put distance between them. Maybe that was what they needed anyway. Distance. Not just now, but for a while maybe...She
didn’t know. Was it time to check on this test yet? She wasn’t sure. She didn’t remember how much time it needed and she wasn’t sure how much
time had passed with she and Koi being depressed and regretful. She just wanted to know. Closing the small distance between herself and the dresser
Devyn’s breath stopped as she stared down at the stick.
Results were in... Koi - 7-4-2014 at 05:22 PM
Over it. He was over all of this. The quiet that he and Devyn had let settle between them had made him nervous. And now the conversation they were
having was making him feel guilty as fuck. It was a damn rollercoaster of emotions in that bedroom and Koi was sort of sick of it. Mainly he was just
tired of feeling it all. Guilt, nervousness, angry, sad, pensive. Tired. He was damn tired. He hadn't felt this much from anything or anyone
outside of the drama from his parents. And that was enough. All of this was supposed to be painless. But none of it was. THIS wasn't. Listening to
Devyn blame herself no matter what he told her was painful. Feeling the way he did because he finally saw himself for the selfish fuck that everyone
else saw him for was painful. He never wanted this. It was supposed to be simple. But then again, when was anything in his life simple? He knew people
who would've killed to be who he was. To have what he had. But then, when you got behind the curtain and saw the real freakshow that was behind it,
anyone wanting Koi Kidd's life was laughable. He smoked, sniffed and swallowed enough to make him a walking vegetable and yet, he fucking woke up
every morning. He stayed away from anything that would've been healthy because just like his father, he knew he'd fuck it up. He lived life
fast...only because he knew life was a dick and he was the fucking pussy. Life fucked you. Just like it was fucking him now. And then...Devyn. He
couldn't even put into words how much he'd sabotaged her. Beautiful, intelligent, funny as fuck...amazing. And yet, her legs stayed open to a fuck up
like him.
Quiet fell between them again, their argument the same. They blamed themselves only to keep from blaming each other. Koi couldn't help but wonder...if
the stick said "you're fucked", how long would it take them to start blaming each other. It was real cute right now, both of them trying to take the
blame from the other. But when what they thought because what was, what would they say then? Would she finally tell him how much of a waste he was for
her? Would he finally tell her how he'd never love her, despite them sharing a baby? She'd slap him. He'd hit her. They'd ignore each other for nine
months and then settle the shit out of court. He'd pay child support and maybe see the baby on the weekends. Devyn would talk about her "ain't shit"
baby daddy and hate Koi for life.
He scoffed quietly at the shit life that played in his head. There wasn't a "first round draft pick" for him or a cute little boutique somewhere in
Cali where Devyn did her thing. There wasn't a happy ending. Not when Koi ruined her life. Which was what he was sure he would do if that fucking
stick read "pregnant".
His thoughts slowed as he watched Devyn stand up again, her nerves probably making her more restless than before. His eyes didn't leave her as she ran
her fingers through her hair, her steps slowing at the dresser...where the test sat.
"Dev." Koi called out to her. They should've looked together...but she'd already looked at the stick...her eyes already looking at the results. Koi
swallowed hard as he stood, his hands in the pockets of his sweatpants. His feet moving him towards her before he could think whether it was best if
he just...stood back. Stayed away.
"Wh-what does it say?"Devyn - 8-4-2014 at 12:04 PM
She wasn’t pregnant.
She wanted to scream. She wanted to dance. She wanted a DRINK! Devyn felt her lips pull at the corners as she picked up the stick to make sure she
hadn’t passed out from stress and this wasn’t a dream. But it wasn’t. Right there in the little display box. The magic words that unlocked their
freedom. Not Pregnant. It was literally the best news she’d gotten in her entire life...so why didn’t it really feel that way? Behind
being completely overjoyed that she hadn’t fucked over both of their lives, she still felt the guilt. Why? She’d been right. Everything
was fine. She wasn’t having a baby, they wouldn’t have to rearrange their lives around playdates and diaper changes, they could go back to it just
being them. Everything could go back to normal ...right? Somehow it didn’t feel that way. She was sure neither of them would mention it, but nothing
was how it had been anymore. They’d reached a whole new level of complicated, baby or not…
Shit! She hadn’t said anything to Koi yet. Turning to face him, Devyn allowed herself to smile. “I’m not pregnant-,” Devyn heard herself
giggle a little before she said it again. “I’m not pregnant, Koi.” There was something magical about saying it out loud. She couldn’t stop.
She said it again, “No baby. No figuring out who’s going to watch him while I go to class. None of that...I’m not fucking pregnant, Koi!!”
When did she get this hype? The guilt had taken a complete back burner to her excitement. She wasn’t having a baby. She wasn’t having his
baby. Koi would be fine. Dev would be fine. Whether or not they would be fine together remained to be seen, but she at least wasn’t
pregnant!
THE BEST NEWS. Koi - 8-4-2014 at 05:23 PM
Shit, he could hear his heart beating. Koi literally could hear every thud that it was making against his chest as he watched Devyn hover over that
test stick for what seemed like hours. Why wasn't she saying anything? What did it say?! Her back was turned to him so all could see was how still she
was standing and...fuck. No. Fuck! And there it was. The one thing he was hoping...praying would just NOT happen...happened. He
couldn't say anything. His tongue was as frozen as his feet were. Silence was speaking loud enough in the room. And their fucking fate was sealed.
Just like that? That was it? No compromising? No do-overs? Just...pregnant. His brain was going in fifty different directions as he looked at
Devyn, hoping she'd...cry, scream...move. But she didn't. She was statue-still, looking at that test like she was bargaining with it, trying to make a
deal on nonexistent ears. That was it. It was over. There was nothing to do but...what the fuck were they supposed to do now? Buy carseats and
pampers? Shit. He wanted to call out to her. He wanted to say anything that would make the situation not seem like the end of the world. But there
was no denying the truth.
I'm... She was what? Two seconds from crying? Koi knew what that was like. But he wouldn't let himself do that shit. He could almost hear his
Pops telling him to "man the fuck up", especially since this was all on his head. Especially since this was HIS FAULT. Especially si-
...not pregnant, Koi.
"What?" What did she say? His eyes widened as his feet finally started working and he moved towards her, his eyes falling on the test stick in her
hand. Not Pregnant. A laugh joined Devyn's giggle as she said it again, the repetition sounding like the BEST melody to his ears. He couldn't
listened to that shit on repeat. All day. Not Pregnant.
"Fuck yes." He said quietly, Devyn excitement spreading to him. "HELL YES." He said louder as he laughed again, a shaky breath escaping him as he
backed into the bed and sat on the side of it, his head falling into his hands again. The hell YES. And just like that, a huge weight lifted from him.
He felt pounds lighter. She wasn't pregnant. They weren't pregnant.
"Oh shit. Never again." He said into his hands. "Never a-fucking-gain." Devyn - 9-4-2014 at 08:38 AM
She was too fucking juiced. Mere moments ago she had been trying to think of ways to tell her aunt she would be bringing another mouth to feed into
her home. She didn’t have to do that anymore. She had been thinking about bringing a kid into a world that would only ever know one side of his
family because Dev wouldn’t be sharing him with any of her family. She didn’t have to worry about that. She had been thinking about names and how
she was sure she could only have boys so there was no need to think of girl names. None of that shit mattered anymore because she was NOT PREGNANT!
Tucking her bottom lip between her teeth, she tried to quell her smile as Koi joined in her excitement. This was a much better look for the kid. Devyn
was sure he would start floating with the weight that had just been lifted. She watched him as he backed away, reclaiming his seat on the bed.
Never again… Never again? Devyn felt her brow furrow as her brain started working on what that meant...Never again what? Never again was he
fucking with her? Never again would they be dumb enough to let some shit like this happen? One she could agree with. The other...maybe she was
overthinking things. She usually did. And did it matter? Not even a little. All that she was really worried about was her pregnancy scare being just
that. A fucking scare. The rest of her worries could wait…
Koi wasn’t going anywhere...hopefully. Zori - 27-2-2015 at 10:56 AM
What the world was he doing? That was the one thought that Zori couldn't help but have, repeatedly, as he drove through the massive gates
that blocked Bishop's Court off from the rest of the island. Not that Nohealani Bluff was anything like the rest of the island. "Rich" and "affluent"
were two words that were etched in every five-star business, perfectly manicured lawn and breathtaking home that Zori passed on his way to Fumie's
community. He really hadn't thought this...visit through considering that he'd barely known what to do when he got to the gates that separated the
houses...no, mansion from the main road. It had to have been pure, dumb ass luck that who he figured out was Fumie's housekeeper was friendly enough
to let an unknown visitor come right on in. And after a second security stop and the sweepingly long entrance, he was still...driving. Even though it
was a bad idea. Even though that was the last moment he'd had to turn around.
But something wouldn't let him turn around. Maybe it was Fumie's absence from their sessions for the past couple of days which was uncharacteristic.
And maybe it had been the fact that she hadn't called. Not to cancel their sessions. Not to speak to him. Not to...she hadn't called. That worried
him. Not that he should've been worried. She was a busy woman and she had a business, a family and a husband to look after. She didn't have time to
run up after him...the man that she'd nearly...
Zori bit at his lip nervously as he drove slowly, passing by towering home after home that wasn't hers, silently kicking himself because he hadn't
done the smart thing. Turn around and go the fuck home. Everything he did was stupid lately. Thinking about the last time they were together,
no matter how long he sat, meditating peace over his thoughts. Calling out of his job, his livelihood, just to check on Fumie. He wasn't...thinking
clearly. Not after the sparring room. He didn't know if he'd ever think clearly again...not if he didn't talk to her.
His car slowed as he drove towards yet another gate, the correct address engraved on a copper plate. Before he could figure out how to get them to
open, the doors slowly parted, leading him up the driveway of yet another sprawling home. He parked beside the three-car garage, one of the doors
opened on a black Range Rover. Fumie's. She was home. Fumie - 27-2-2015 at 12:11 PM
It was one of her better days. Her baby boy was acting a little...funky. She would guess it had something to do with the talk he and his
girlfr--Devyn had a couple days ago, but he wasn’t talking to her about it. That sucked. But her husband was exactly where she wanted him
(away from her) and she had gotten to spend all day with her baby Eri, cooking breakfast together and spending most of the morning in their PJs binge
watching Criminal Minds. Now she was watching her baby splash around in the pool while she sat on the edge and just took her in. It was a good day.
One where she had only thought about her almost romp with Zori at the gym only a few times instead of the usual few hundred.
She hadn’t spoken to him. She’d had sessions, but she hadn’t even called to cancel. She just...It wasn’t that she didn’t want to! No. She
would have loved to just hear his voice again, but...she just didn’t know what to say. She still had no idea what to say after what they’d done
together. So she avoided him. It was the easiest thing to do and she figured he needed a little space too after. Time to think about what they...she
didn’t know. She wanted to say what they were, but what could they be really? Fumie found herself twisting the ring Shemar had given her whenever
she thought of Zori and she was doing it now. Her mind had drifted...but it shouldn’t have! She was with Eri now! She needed to be with her
daughter.
Fumie smiled at her as she waved, making sure Fumie was watching before she disappeared below the surface, probably to do some kind of trick. A trick
she would never see the end of as Ipo called to her from the backdoor. And she wasn’t alone. Fumie gave a short gasp, her feet coming out of the
water as she pulled at her shorts before starting over. Zori was here. In her home. And then outside of it as Ipo left and he stepped outside, their paths meeting near the
lounges on the side of the pool.
“Hey, Zori…” Zori - 27-2-2015 at 01:16 PM
Walking through Fumie's house without his jaw dropping open was a challenge as Zori passed object after object that he was sure boasted price tags
over over a thousand. Her home was a reflection of her. Class and beauty. Zori could see touches of her in every room the housekeeper led him past.
The light, sweet floral scent that her skin carried was in the fresh cut flowers on every surface. There was a warmth there that was out of place for
a house that was as big in size as hers was. A familiarity. A photocopy of the feeling that Fumie gave him whenever she was near him. He shook his
head at himself as he followed the housekeeper through the airy kitchen and towards the french doors that led to the patio. He had to stop thinking
the way he was. There wasn't any room for them. In his life, nor Fumie's. The warmth in that home had nothing to do with Zori and he had to get it
through his damn head that it never would. Fumie's family lived here. Her children...her husband. And that was when it came to his attention.
That not once had he thought about this as the home she lived in with her husband. That her husband's career and their foundation had paid for all of
this and it was a damn insult that Zori hadn't even acknowledged that. That her husband may have been home. That instead of coming to see Fumie for
what reason he still hadn't figured out, he should've been coming to apologize to her about his inappropriateness. But he'd said it before...no more
apologies, which made him relieved...because it would've been hard as hell to apologize for something he didn't regret.
"One moment..." The housekeeper said, stepping out of the door way leading to a pool where...shit. Where a little girl was playing. The kids.
Another thing Zori didn't think about when he decided to see Fumie. He should've known how uncomfortable this might be for Fumie. To have to explain
to her kids who he was...which was her trainer, right? Just her trainer. That was it. Then why did his heart speed up as Ipo called out to her,
announcing his arrival.
He stepped forward, his eyes meeting Fumie's as she stood up and walked towards him, meeting him near the side of the pool.
"Hey..." He said simply, his lips smiling softly at her as she looked up at him, looking at him expectantly...and probably waiting for him to tell her
why he'd come to her home, uninvited.
"Yeah, I..." His words stalled as he looked into her eyes, warding away a flash off his body pressed against her, her legs wrapped around him in his
gym. His fingers played at the collar of his shirt before his hands went to his pocket. He was nervous and for once, he couldn't hide it. Maybe because he knew how crazy this looked, showing
up at the home she'd never given him the address to or even invited his company to.
"...I just...wanted to see if you were okay." He shrugged, looking back at the pool, the little girl swimming there coming to the edge as she watched
curiously. "I didn't mean to intrude..."Fumie - 27-2-2015 at 02:00 PM
Well, this was a surprise. Especially because she wasn’t 100% sure Zori knew where she lived. She’d probably written her address on a waiver or
something when he started training her...why was she thinking about that?! It didn’t matter, he was here! She had pulled her feet from the pool and
was doing her best not to skip to him. Fumie was so happy to see him! But she couldn’t exactly display that. Not in front of Eri who had come up for
air. Her baby was a lot like her. She wanted answers when she wanted them and she knew there would be questions if Zori was anything more than a
friend.Questions Fumie still wasn’t sure how to answer.
Fumie greeted him, her teeth catching her bottom lip right after to quell a smile. He was smiling at her though. And she loved that. He wasn’t upset
with her for avoiding him for the last few days. And that fact that he was here was speaking volumes. He wanted to see her. He wanted to see her as
much as she wanted to see him, only she had been brave enough to do something about it. They shared a moment where neither of them said anything and
they just kind of stared at one another. Fumie had to shake her head clear of visions of him between her thighs, moaning into her mouth. She shifted
on her feet as he began speaking his words as unsure as she felt. I just wanted to see if you were okay. She allowed herself to smile then.
Her highly inappropriate response threatening to spill into the air. She was now that he was here. Intrude?
“No. Of course you’re not. Uh...please. Sit.” Fumie gestured to the lounges. Watching as Zori’s eyes floated back to the pool. Oh!
“Shoot. I’m sorry-,” and she was sorry about that; no more apologies. She giggled a little hoping to make it a little less awkward than she was
making it. “Zo, this is my daughter Eri.” She turned her attention, “And Eri honey, this is my friend Zori. He and mommy work together.”
Fumie allowed her hand to tap his arm after he and Eri greeted one another, signaling him to follow. They covered the short distance to the lounges,
each of them taking one across from the other. They needed this talk. Zori - 27-2-2015 at 03:10 PM
Her smile. It was all Zori needed to let the tremors of unfamiliar nervousness pulsing through him die down. A smile let him know that everything that
had happened between them hadn't ruined the possibility of what they could be. Which was friends, of course. Really, this time. If there was anything
that he wanted to prove to her, it was that he could handle a friendship with her and that she didn't have to worry about what happened in the
sparring room ever happening again. That he respected her enough to never mention it again. That when it came to respecting her and the space that she
needed to be an honest wife and a dedicated mother, he would give her that and he wouldn't violate that space again. He wondered if she could hear his
thoughts as they gazed at each other for a moment, her teeth biting at her lips. And he wondered if she heard them, would she know how much he really
meant them...only if she wanted him to. What was he thinking? Of course she would. They'd had a moment of weakness. And no matter how long it took,
things would go back to the way they were before. If that was they way they were after all of this, he'd would gladly take it.
He smiled again as Fumie directed him towards the lounges the lined the pool, his eyes moving back towards the pool as a girl with a head full of
curls and the height that was a little beyond her years emerged from the water and grabbed her towel from the side of the pool. Fumie followed his
line of sight and turned back towards him, introducing him to...her daughter. This was Eri? The smile that hadn't wavered from his lips widened a
little as he extended his hand. Her eyes met his outstretched hand as she eyed it curiously, wrapping the towel around herself. She cocked her head to
the side, her wet curls dripping onto the ground.
"You mean your 'coworker', mommy?" She questioned in a voice that was much older than ten. She seemed like a mature one, her hand finally coming out
to grasp Zori's in an awkward handshake before she let his hand go, widening the distance between them. With another look, she turned on her heel and
retreated back to the pool.
"You should watch me do a headstand in the water. I'm going to call you 'Zo' like my mom does..." Zori watched her jump into the water before he got
the chance to reply to her, the splash nearly catching his shoes. He laughed turning to Fumie as she felt her tap his arm, wanting him to follow her.
They sat on the pool chairs, facing each other in silence for a moment, listening to Eri's splashes in the water.
"Been missing you at the gym. How long were you going to let me keep showing up before you told me you were done with me, huh?" He joked, his voice
breaking their silence. Though his words were playful, he couldn't help hearing the truth in them.Fumie - 28-2-2015 at 06:37 AM
Fumie watched as her baby pulled herself out of the pool, her introduction not nearly enough for her. Of course she had questions. She wouldn’t be
Eri if she didn’t. Grabbing her towel and wrapping it around her tiny frame and came closer, Zori’s hand went out for her to shake and she did
what she always did. She sensed. Fumie didn’t know what it was about Eri but even at her young age she was a pretty good judge of character. She
knew who she liked within seconds of meeting them and Fumie didn’t know what her criteria was for making these decisions, but usually things worked
out for her. Fumie often wished she had that talent.
Fumie laughed again as she probed, searching her friend comment for more meaning. Coworker? Sure. Fine. If it meant she wouldn’t ask any more
questions. “Yes, baby. He’s a coworker.” She watched as she finally took Zori’s hand, giving it a small shake before releasing it. And
deciding. Fumie’s smile widened as Eri told Zori how impressive she was in the water and informed him that she would be calling him ‘Zo’ just
like her mom does. She liked him. Fumie reached out, ruffling her wet curls as she retreated back to the pool and she and Zo found seats. They sat for
a moment in silence. Fumie pulled her shades from her head placing them next to her before she ran a hand through her hair pushing it all away from
her face. Zori spoke first.
He missed her? Really? No. She needed to stop; she was reading too much into that. He was being friendly.But done with him? Her smile faltered a
little as she looked away from him. That was more loaded than he would probably admit. He thought what they had on the mats was a mistake? Because it
wasn’t for her. She licked her lips.
“Do you remember what I said to you in your office after the gala?” She waited for his answer. He didn’t need to repeat her words, especially
not with Eri within earshot, but she did need to know that he remembered them. That she could not promise not to cross lines with him. That she
couldn’t swear to him she would do “the right thing” when it came to the two of them. She liked him. More than she probably should while still
married to Shemar.
“I’m not done with you-,” she whispered her words. She was the opposite actually. In the few days that had passed since the were last together,
all she could think about was him. How right everything was when he was with her. How much better things would be if they could just...she wasn’t
done. She was probably a glutton for punishment, but she was far from done. She wanted more of him than he had already given and everything in her
wanted to find a way to make that possible. “I just...I didn’t know what to do after…” she let her words trail off, a hand pushing through her
hair again as her eyes connected with Eri’s. She was eavesdropping. Or at least trying to the way Fumie knew she would. Could they really talk and
leave so much unspoken? Zori - 28-2-2015 at 06:49 PM
Did Zori remember her words after the gala? Of course he did. He couldn't forget them if he tried. I can’t promise that I won’t cross that
line again. He'd heard her loud and clear when she'd said it the first time, only thinking of it as a promise. Something that she intended to do
if she got the chance...an opportunity. But he should've seen it as something more. A warning. Because Fumie had been a woman of her word. Not that
Zori would ever blame what happened in the sparring room on her. No, she was just doing what she'd said she would, without hesitation. He knew the
only person that hadn't done what they said they'd do was him. He'd told her that he would be a gentleman, that he wouldn't take advantage of her.
That he'd respect her marriage...he'd respect her. He'd failed. Badly. First test of being a man of his word and he'd flunked miserably. And
if a man didn't have his word, what did he have? This, Zori guessed. An awkward afterward. An unexpected visit to a married woman that hadn't even
given him her address because he couldn't get her off his damn mind. And he knew it was wrong to watch her little the way he was. The smile creases at
the corners of her lips, the wisps of hair that floated on the breeze...and to feel so weightless. He didn't feel...anything. Not the guilt he knew he
should've felt after meeting the daughter she shared with the man she'd married. And seeing the home they'd built together? He should've felt
something besides...happiness. No matter how he tried to think about what he was chancing with this visit, he couldn't shake how relieved he felt to
finally lay eyes on her.
He nodded his head as a silent answer, his eyes going back to the pool where Eri had just finished a headstand...and was curiously looking in their
direction. He smiled at her again, his hand coming up in a small wave. She returned the wave, her stare only growing more curious as he looked
away...just in time to hear Fumie's words. She wasn't done with him. His eyes met hers as he thought about her answer. The way she'd said it,
Zori knew what she'd meant without even looking at her. She was keeping her promise. That made him wonder...would he keep his the next time? Because
he was sure there would be a next time. If he kept this up, playing with fire...spending time with Fumie when he knew he needed to keep his distance.
Coming to see her, unannounced. Getting too close. When they couldn't stay away from each other, lines blurring between what was right and what felt
right...would he do what he said he'd do? Respect her?
"...Do you remember what I told you?" He asked, letting a short silence fall over them after she admitted what Zori knew had caused her vanishing act.
She didn't know what to do after...what happened between them. And he could understand that...because nor did he. There was a battle going on inside
of him that day. Go back on everything you promised you wouldn't do or be a man of your word. And lately, the battle was turning into a
series of them. A war between right and wrong. And Zori could feel it. The wrong was winning, confusing him as it started to look more right than the
"right" did. And Zori's inability to do what he said he'd do, what he promised her he'd do was bringing up more losses than wins on his side. I
can't disrespect you like that again. I just...I can't.
"I want to mean what I said to you. I know you can't tell that, but I...really do." His voice was low, his elbows on his knees as he watched Fumie's
reaction. They didn't have a choice. No matter how good it felt to touch Fumie, to feel like the only man in her life, the truth was that Zori wasn't.
And the pleasurable thing would be to not care what it would cost her to lose everything because of him. Her family, her husband, the organization.
The right thing...was to do what he said he'd do. Be her friend. Respect her. Respect her family.
He opened his mouth to speak again, but his words halted as he saw something move out of the corner of his eye. As he turned, he smiled as Eri came
into his line of sight, her inquisitive eyes looking from him to Fumie and back again.
"You guys missed my handstand. You're talking about something important, aren't you?" She said simply, sitting on the lounge next to her mother as she
dried her hair with her towel.Fumie - 1-3-2015 at 10:50 AM
He remembered. Fumie had already admitted her attraction to him and she was restating it now. Nothing had changed for her. That was what she was
really trying to get at here. Nothing about what had happened in the sparring room between them was regrettable to her. She wanted Zori then and she
wanted him still. Not just physically, but wholly. In a way she shouldn’t as a married woman. Despite Shemar’s treatment of their “commitment”
to one another, Fumie had always valued herself as faithful. Shemar could call her all kinds of things, but she would always be better than him
because she was one thing he could never claim. She was honest and faithful to the vows they’d taken almost 20 years ago. That was changing and it
was hard for her. Confusing. If she allowed herself to think about it, something she rarely did, she was more committed to the facade than she was
Shemar, and where Zori fit into that? She hadn’t figured it all out yet...and it scared her. That explained her recent avoidance. She stated it
plainly for Zori though, her words just as unsure as she felt. She just didn’t know.
Maybe he was here to tell her, his voice breaking the short silence that followed her confession. Did she remember what he said? That he was a man who
valued respect. That he wouldn’t cross the line with her again. She remembered. She felt guilty about those exact sentiments whenever she thought
about what she wanted; how much she wanted him. She was keeping him from being a man of his word and that was something else she was struggling with.
She would never dream of steering Zori off his path. His discipline was important to him and being a weakness to him was…liberating. She
was a selfish bitch for thinking so, but she loved that Zori grew weak in presence. That he found her irresistible and no amount of meditation could
quell his thirst for her. She reveled in it. Because she had never been that woman for anyone else. He valued her and it was something she wanted to
keep feeling. Sadly that meant going against a lot of the things he stood for.
I want to mean what I said to you. Fumie nodded her understanding. He wanted to be a man of his word. He wanted to keep her marriage intact,
admittedly more than she was beginning to think she wanted to. He wanted to keep her honest as well. It was noble and righteous and only made her want
him more...this whole situation was a mess. Zori opened his mouth to say something else, but stopped short. Eri. Oh Eri. Fumie loved her little girl,
but she always did this. She was so wise beyond her years she often forgot the place of a child. It wasn’t entirely her fault; Fumie took pride in
the fact the Eri was her mother’s daughter. She was almost exactly like Fumie in many ways. A lot of them her more annoying attributes.
She spoke as she took a seat next to her mother, patting her hair with a towel as she looked between Fumie and Zori. Were they talking about something
important? Fumie gave a dry chuckle as she thought of the many times she’d had to explain to Eri what was and was not appropriate for her to
question. Never once had her restrictions had anything to do with keeping a secret, but that was something that was changing as well. Her arms fell
around her baby, pulling her closer before she kissed the top of her head.
“Mmhmm. We are talking about something very important. We’re talking about little girls who like to insert themselves into grown
folks business. Her voice was sweet despite her chastisement. She wasn’t trying to be mean, simply telling Eri that some things she didn’t
need to know, as she had many times before. Fumie watched her daughter’s features turn to a pout. She wasn’t getting her way. “Don’t you frown
up that cute face at me-,” her finger reached out, tapping her nose. “If you’re done swimming maybe you should shower and change and we’ll go
get ice cream from that little place on the Boardwalk? What do you think?”Zori - 1-3-2015 at 01:05 PM
Zori watched her work through what he'd said to her in his office after the gala and begin to understand what he was saying to her now. How he wanted
to still be the man that he said he was the first time they'd crossed the line with each other...and how, even though that was who he was, who he had
always been...he didn't know how long he could continue on that path. When Zori left Oregon, he'd made a promise to himself that everything he did,
from that point, would be to better himself. No negative influences, no distractions. He poured his resources into the KnuckleUp, swore off the liquor
and submersed himself back into the religious practices that had kept him breathing after the Calio and Katrina. All of that had worked for awhile.
He'd been happy and his mind was clear. But he'd also been untested. Nothing had made him second guess the promise he'd made to himself four years ago
like Fumie. Nothing had threatened making him a liar. But that's what he saw in himself now. A liar. A man that couldn't stick to what he said at the
first sign of push back. And what he didn't understand about himself was why he didn't regret his moment of weakness. Because he didn't...regret it.
He didn't regret what happened between them in the sparring room and he didn't regret telling her, in so few words, how hard it was to keep it from
happening again. His momma, who was more of a believer than she was religious, always told him about how the spirit of a man could be willing but his
flesh would be weak. But for Zori, that wasn't the case. Every part of him was pulling towards Fumie. The sinew, muscle and bone that made up his
flesh craved her touch, her closeness. So much so that there almost wasn't anything left that was fighting against doing what Zori knew in his heart
was wrong. Every part of him wanted her...badly enough to forget his own mother's words and his promises...just to be with her.
But he knew that he would never truly be with her. This home, her beautiful, intelligent daughter, her life...all of that was a testament to just how
much she would never belong to him. Her body could. What they'd started in the sparring room, they could've finished it. But after it was done, she'd
still be Fumie Kidd. That ring on her finger would still be four carats of marriage and years of commitment. And it was a loss to Zori to even start
to believe that there would be more for them.
In spite of his thoughts, Zori smiled as Eri walked towards them and sat between them, a very honest question in the air. What were they talking
about. Zori's eyes found Fumie's quickly as he looked away, letting her reply to Eri's question. He silently chuckled at Eri's boldness, knowing that
had that been him as a child, his momma would've backhanded him quicker than he got the question out. He was never a curious child, very hesitant to
press matters that he knew were between "grown folks". But he admired that in Eri, her comfortableness with her mother and surprisingly, with him.
Zori would never mention it, but he could see the uniqueness that lay in Eri, regardless if Fumie had told him how intelligent she was. She seemed to
be years beyond her looks, an old spirit looking out form behind her eyes every time she watched Zori.
If you're done swimming maybe you should shower... Ha. Zori could tell a mother trying to distract her overly aware child when he saw one.
And Fumie definitely was, promising ice cream and a trip to the Boardwalk for her obedience...and probably a little more time to sort out what was
going on between she and Zori. Which he appreciated, even if it meant he'd be taking his leave. Or...not?
"I think that Zo should go with us, too...or no deal." Eri spoke, her quiet voice growing firm with her mother. Zori's amused smile met Eri's very
determined face.
"You can decide while you finish talking. I'll be changing my clothes." And with that Eri waltzed in the house with the confidence of a forty year
old, her face set like her mother's when there was no talking her out of her decision.
"Well! I guess she told you." Zori laughed, leaning back on the lounge as he watched Eri walk away.Fumie - 1-3-2015 at 03:00 PM
Eri was such a little woman. She was far too grown for her own good sometimes and Fumie guessed she had herself to thank for that. The same thing was
in Koi. She’d raised her kids to be independent. Powerful, in their own rights. Each of them had their talents and she encouraged them to own that.
It was the reason she paid tuition to that expensive ass private school and it was littered through every conversation she had with them. Fumie wanted
them to be their best selves. She knew they were capable. Her job as a mother was to simply keep them on track. That was why she was not completely
shutting Eri down now. She should have been asking questions about things she didn’t understand. But what was a mother to do when she didn’t have
an answer much at all, let alone an answer appropriate for a nine year old... Eri’s talent lied in her intelligence and the older she got the older
she seemed. These days Fumie was beginning to wonder which of them was the adult.
Especially as she countered her offer for ice cream, letting Fumie and Zori know that “Zo” would be joining them and the term was non-negotiable.
Fumie giggled as her grown little girl walked away to get ready for their ice cream date. She rolled her eyes a little as Zori laughed about the
exchange he’d just witnessed. Yeah. That was her Eri.
“That little girl…-,” Fumie shook her head a light laugh on her lips, “I swear she’s nine going on 29. She’s going to be holding my board
meetings by the time she’s twelve.” Fumie laughed again at the thought; about how true it might be. She sighed as the moment passed. They were
alone…and they had more important things to discuss than whether he wanted to join them on the Boardwalk.
“Zo, listen, the sparring room…-,” Fumie bit her lip nervously, unsure of how to say what she wanted to. “I hear what you’re saying and I
know how important your word is to you, but...I want us.” She let that linger, a silence following her confession as she watched him carefully. Was
that too much? Probably. But there was more. “I don’t have the answers to everything, but I like us. I want that...I at least want to see
what it is before we let it go.”Zori - 1-3-2015 at 03:44 PM
The first time meeting her and Eri had successfully commandeered Zori's schedule with an "invitation" to the Boardwalk that he was pretty sure wasn't
up for discussion. Leaning back on the lounge, he grinned at Fumie's reaction to her daughter's boldness and he wondered if she saw the same boldness
in herself. Like he'd told her before, it was a blessing to see yourself in your children, something that Zori hadn't been able to witness yet. The
love and admiration in Fumie's eyes lingered as she spoke about Eri jokingly, but with pride, a sigh bringing a short silence between them. Eri's
departure meant that it was just Fumie and him now. They were alone, which meant no more speaking in code. Total transparency.
I want us. Zori focused on those words, the only words that stuck out with what she'd said. She wanted...them. Not only him. Biting his lip,
he felt his back stiffen against the lounge. It wasn't her words that made him uncomfortable. It was what they meant. That somehow, Fumie wanted them.
She wanted what Zori thought about during meditation and silent moments. She wanted what Zori knew was only reserved for wishes, not for wants.
Because them wasn't happening. How could it? She was married...and Zori wasn't. If the situation had been different between them, if she'd been the
single one sitting at the table with him at the dinner at Spago, they wouldn't have been stuck in this cycle of things they couldn't have, returning
back to them like something could change. Like something could be different. Nothing was different. The only way that it could be different, Zori
didn't even want to think. He knew what splitting a family meant. Divorce. Anger. Resentment. All Zori could do was look at the healthy, brilliant
child that Shemar and Fumie had raised. The hell would happen to Eri if Zori even thought about giving Fumie what she wanted? He'd seen children with
separated and divorced parents, some of them even training under him at the gym. He couldn't give Eri and her brother that future.
"Us? How would we do that?" He questioned Fumie, his head turning to her. He sat up a bit as their eyes connected. "It can't be just us...not when
you've already got an 'us'. What about Shemar? The kids?" Zori hated to physically say Shemar's name, thoughts being nearly enough. Saying her
husband's name made him even more present, even more real.
"I couldn't do that to your kids..."Fumie - 1-3-2015 at 06:50 PM
How do we do that? That was the golden question wasn’t it? How did they do “us” like she wanted them to? She’d told him she didn’t
have all of the answers and that was one of the ones she was still trying to figure out. She didn’t know what she was asking specifically, she just
wondered what they could be...if they could be more. Because Zori was more than a friend to her, whether he knew it or not. Fumie had already trusted
him with more of her life than she had anyone. He knew some of her dreams, he knew (very little) about her issues with Shemar...Zori was a
confidant to her and he was turning into more the more time they spent together. If he wanted that to change he would have to stop seeing her. Was he
willing to do that though? Obviously something brought him here. She’d never given him the address, but here he was. Unannounced and risking quite a
bit. He felt something too…
It can’t just be us...She knew that! She wasn’t delusional, she was just...desperate. She heard herself sigh as she admitted that to
herself. She was desperate for a life that didn’t involve Shemar at any point. She was desperate to escape to a world where she had meaning to
someone, where she mattered, where she was valued. Zori was that world for her. Didn’t he get that? Of course he didn’t. Why would he didn’t
know her. He barely knew anything real about her outside of the things she had said in anger at the gym that day...That fact became even more apparent
as he asked what her request meant for Shemar. For her kids.
Fumie couldn’t help the smile that reached her lips. She had enough control not to laugh though. The mere thought of her kids having a problem with
getting away from their father was honestly laughable. Koi could barely stand to look at him now and Eri was afraid of Shemar. Neither of her kids
would be upset by the divorce of their parents. Because that was what the two of them were dancing around. Divorce. It was the only option if
Fumie’s exploration lead to something real. Something real…She hadn’t really allowed herself to think of this like that, but that’s
what her relationship with Zori was. It was a shot. A chance to have something real with someone.
“You’re doing it again.” her smile hadn’t faltered as he finished. He was making assumptions. She couldn’t blame him for that, because Fumie
prided herself on the front she put up for the public. On the outside looking in her family was perfect. Zori had no idea… “Don’t assume you
would be doing something to my kids. I think about my kids every second of everyday.” That was true. And she was sure her kids would be
nothing but supportive of Fumie leaving their father.
“We don’t have to get married tomorrow Zo…” Fumie shrugged a little, her smile leaving her so that he knew she was serious. “I just want us
to get to know one another...I mean really know…” No more of this surface bullshit.
She wanted “us”, with him. Zori - 2-3-2015 at 05:38 AM
The more Zori thought about Fumie, the more real the situation became. Fumie was asking for an "us" with him. After years of it just being "Zori",
more shit heavy relationships than he could even count and more drama than he wanted, he finally had someone asking for just...him. But as usual, any
situation he found himself in came with stipulations and his one happened to be a husband. A family that was already intact. Normal just wasn't going
to be his thing, was it? He fought back a chuckle in the short silence while Fumie thought through his questions. If he had to be honest, he'd given
up the idea of "normal" a long time ago. Hell, what was normal? If a faceless daddy, a childhood in the streets and being the man of his house since
birth was normal now, then he was right on track. But Zori doubted that. Strongly. Through all of the abnormal, he never stopped to think about how
unfair or how messed up his situation was. He just...handled it. Would he do that now? Even though the situation was morally different and difficult.
Fumie. Her family. Her prior obligations that didn't have a damn thing to do with Zori. How was any of this...right? If his momma had any
inkling of the mess running through his brain, she would've beat him. Because nothing was more important than family and respecting the sanctity of it
to her. Nothing. He wished it were that simple for him...
You're doing it again. Zori hadn't noticed that his gaze had shifted beyond Fumie, back to the towering house. With its housekeeper that
answered the front door, the pool house that looked about as big, if not bigger than his spot, the gate outside of the house...all things that Zori
would probably never be able to give her. He was a simple man with very limited needs and he didn't know if Fumie would even be able to live a life
she wasn't accustomed to. Would she even give all of it up? When being with Zori got old and whatever life she was trying to live through being with
him wasn't interesting anymore, what would happen?
"Doing what?" He asked, her answer coming as quickly as his question. Assuming. Okay, he could agree with that. He had been. Everything that
he saw and heard, he took it for face value, even though he knew that he hadn't seen more than a piece of who Fumie really was. What her family really
was... It was the same with her. Fumie knew about where he came from and the surface facts he let her see, but she knew nothing about him. His life in
Oregon, the jobs he had to take just to be who he was now...his childhood. That was his doing, though. Putting up a block between them and only
letting the superficial come through to avoid...what happened anyway. He couldn't help but smirk at his thoughts. He could have done all of the
preventing that he wanted to, but something told him they would've ended up on the mat in the sparring room anyway.
"Let me get this straight..." He clasped his hands together, his eyes narrowing. "You're asking me to date a married woman? Because getting to know
you...seeing where things go...that's what that means." For once, Zori just laid it out the way it was. The harshness of it. He would be spending his
time, sharing himself with, getting to know a married woman. It was a gamble...a scary one. What if he said "yes" and they started to get to know each
other. And Zori, being who he was, fell as hard as he always did when he felt the way he knew he was beginning to about Fumie...but she didn't. And
the triviality of "them" wore off and she chose her kids...her marriage? What did that mean for him?
"I like you, Fumie..." He stated plainly, looking at her as he spoke. "...more than I honestly should. But..." He shook his head, breaking their gaze
on each other.
"I'll be here for you...whenever you need me. I promise you that." He took a breath to ready the words he knew he had to say. "Anything more than
that? As long as you're wearing that ring on that finger? Nah, mama...I can't." Fumie - 2-3-2015 at 03:08 PM
She knew she sounded completely nuts. She was more than 15 years married and asking another man to spend time with her in the hopes of it becoming
something more. It sounded crazy, but Fumie knew it wasn’t really. If Zori really knew Shemar, if he knew what her life with him was like...not
everything that sparkled was diamonds and her relationship with Shemar had turned from sugar to shit a long time ago. Fumie wanted to leave him.
She’d tried countless times, but somehow she always ended up staying. More often than not he would threaten her with her children and force her into
submission. Oh the really shitty days there were thinly veiled threats to her life. Why he wanted to keep her around when both of them were miserable
was beyond her understanding, but here they both were...for now. She was working on changing that now that she knew Zori.
You’re asking me to date a married woman? What was with the labels? Why did they have to call it anything? She liked him, he liked her.
Couldn’t they just spend time together? That’s usually what people who got along did. “Come on Zo-,” she sighed, her hand reaching out to
touch him for the first time since his arrival. It rested atop his as she kept speaking, “don’t label it. Just...just go with it. Can’t we just
try?” That was all she was really asking. To explore what this was. She just wanted to try things out; see what happened...was that too much?
Apparently. He broke his gaze on her, pulling his hand away as he turned her down in so many words. He couldn’t deal with the ring...And once again,
Shemar was taking from her, hoping to leave her as miserable and alone and she tried to stop everyone from seeing she was...Everything inside of Fumie
wanted to pull that fucking ring off of her finger and pitch it in the pool. This marriage didn’t mean shit to her! It didn’t mean shit to anyone
that was actually in it! It only meant something to Zori...but now wasn’t the time to tell him that. As desperate as she was, she didn’t want him
to know that.
“Okay-,” she said it simply, a nod confirming her words. He was a good man. She wasn’t going to push him into doing something he knew was
wrong...but he also wasn’t saying he wanted to stop seeing her...and that had ended up in a…pleasurable place for the both of them
before. Zori - 3-3-2015 at 03:09 PM
Okay. Zori looked up again, his eyes meeting Fumie's face, her eyes reading something other than what he'd been expecting after just having
told a woman he all but fully slept with in his sparring room that he thought it was better that they just "be friends". She nodded, her face calm
and...understanding. She got where he was coming from and...she wasn't arguing with him. He smirked a little as they sat for a moment, watching each
other and he couldn't help but feel like they'd...done this before. Him, telling her what he wouldn't do, her agreeing to it after telling him what
she wanted...only to end up doing exactly the opposite and something was telling him that this time, it wouldn't be any different. And even with
knowing that, he still couldn't end whatever it was he was forming with Fumie. He was hoping a friendship was building and they could put the way that
they were both feeling about each other behind them. Because their training session weren't only about keeping her healthy and distracted...they were
about keeping her happy. Taking all the mess in her life that weighed her down and putting it aside for just a moment. He wanted to be her safe
place...more than anything.
"Okay..." He said, his smirk slipping into a smile as he stood from his lounge chair, looking down at her as he picked his car keys up from where he'd
placed them on the chair beside him.
"...guess I'd better get going." He didn't want to go. But he knew that if he stayed, things would get awkward. And telling a female, whether she was
okay with it or not, that you didn't want to date her seemed like a good place to take his leave. "You and Eri have a date anyway..."
"Nope, Zo..." A soft, authoritative voice behind him chimed in as he spoke. He looked over his shoulder, watching Eri descend the stairs from the
kitchen as she walked back towards them. She stopped at the foot of the stairs, wearing a face very much like her mother's.
"...you mean WE have a date." She corrected him, her lips pursed enough to tell him he better not fight her on the matter.
Zori chuckled and looked down at Fumie, shrugging as held his hand out to her.
"You heard your daughter." Another chuckle escaped him as Fumie sighed, grabbing his hand, smiling at him as she stood.
