She didn’t want to fight with him. She wouldn’t let it go there. If this conversation went sour fast, which it had the potential to do, she would
not hesitate to squash the entire thing and let “behave” take a back seat. After speaking she immediately wanted to take each and every one of her
words back. I need you. What the hell was she thinking? She watched his features shift, the discomfort in his demeanor clear as she tried to
clean up what she’d just said. But she couldn’t really. It was too honest to be covered or backtracked. She needed him. The only thing that had
passed since their night together was time. Her mother was still gone and she still felt it. Every minute of every hour of every day. And as hard as
she tried to hold things together in front of people, she wasn’t even half of herself anymore. She couldn’t pinpoint what it was about Koi that
she needed, but it was him. In general. That was true the first night and it rang even truer now.
Devyn’s gaze slipped as she finished her little honesty hour and she waited for him to tell her that this was too much. That he wasn’t meant to be
needed and she’d have to find someone else. She got that...kind of. Being needed meant he’d have to be responsible, dependable. Two things Koi had
admitted to not being on more than one occasion. She was asking him to change...but not really. All she really wanted was for him to
stay around. That year they spent on the outs couldn’t happen again. She couldn’t stomach being without the one guy that made her focus on the
positive things in her life rather than the negative. And...she wouldn’t have to.
I got you, Hips... She looked up as his fingers slipped between her and he spoke. He would be there. Koi wasn’t going anywhere and that was
all she really needed to hear. She smiled as he kept talking, telling her, however vaguely, what they were telling people. And in true Koi fashion
that “what” was “what-the-fuck-ever-they-felt-like”. She could do that...but there was nothing to explain to anyone right now. In fact...
“You know-,” she paused, standing as she again closed the distance between them, her arms coming to wrap around his neck, “This ‘behave’
thing gets really old really fast.” She smirked and then her lips met his again in hopes that they might get just a little farther than they had
before they were interrupted by Dhonny this time.
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Thursday night at Koi’s house. Valentine’s Day at Koi’s. He’d had practice after school so she hadn’t made it over here until about
six, but they’d spent the last three hours practically glued to one another. She knew when he called what he was asking for. Come over
here and chill with me. We’ll watch a movie or some shit...Yeah. They hadn’t made it past the opening credits before said movie was watching
them pull one another’s clothes off. He wasn’t slick! Little did he know, Koi didn’t have to make up an excuse to see her on any day,
Valentine’s Day especially. She’d decided when she heard the words ‘come over’. Dev wasn’t going to lie, what she and Koi had would have
been confusing. ‘Would have’ because neither of them thought about it long enough to truly call it anything that might stir up the feelings that
turned everything to shit. They were friends. Just friends and that was what worked for the two of them.
Some days, more so than others. Like today. They hadn’t had any kind of conflict, literally all day. Not at school and certainly not during
their...chill session, so Devyn was in the highest of spirits as she descended the stairs leading to the kitchen, her mind focused on a cold
glass of apple juice and not so much on keeping Koi’s shirt covering her ass. Who cared really? Eri was at a friend’s house and his parents
were...out, as usual. According to Koi no one would be home until well after midnight so she wasn’t worried about a thing.
Her bare feet padded across the cool linoleum of the kitchen floor stopping just in front of the fridge where she got what she’d come for. Juice.
What? Sex with Koi was tiring. He’d say the same if he wasn’t upstairs half-dead asleep. And as it turned out, Valentine’s Day sex was better
than make up sex, or high after a party sex...or it’s Tuesday and I don’t have practice sex. All of the above usually made her hoarse
though and apple juice was going to soothe her today.Pulling the bottle from the fridge she set it on the island before going to the cabinet for a
glass.
She turned around just as the lights in the kitchen were flipped on.
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Her feet were killing her. The throbbing was so damn intense that she was surprised she’d made it through the front door of the house before she
kicked her heels off. Was it a surprise? She’d been on her feet for twelve hours that day! A meeting with the foundation chairs that morning. A long
luncheon with a few promising, potential sponsors. More planning. More working. More slaving over “Kidd’s Kids” like the charity was her own
flesh and blood. But in a way, it was. She’d birthed it, nurtured it and now she was raising it…by herself, just like her actual living and
breathing children as Shemar Kidd’s ass was nowhere to be found. Well, it WAS Valentine’s Day. That , of course, meant he was one of two places.
With a homewrecker or with SOME homewreckers. Fumie wasn’t sure as he usually did as the spirit of whoredom moved him to do. And still, even though
he was absent from the body, he was still controlling every aspect of his estranged wife’s life. From her overly busy day to those painful ass
Louboutins that Shemar “insisted” she wear. Females that belong with me always have a pair of red bottoms on… And even though Fumie was
sure he hadn’t felt genuinely about that comment in a while, the truth still stood. She belonged with him. No…she belonged TO him. Every damn inch
of her. Every molecule. So much so that even when she tried to get away from him and the shit he put her through, she still did things that reminded
her of him. Like the charity. Like this house. Like…her entire life. Everything belonged to Shemar Kidd.
Well…not everything.
Fumie felt herself smile as she pushed her feet out of her heels and padded softly across the foyer, leaving the “torture devices” that Shemar
loved so much right where she had stepped out them. She hadn’t smiled so much in so long but…she kind of had a reason to now. Because HE didn’t
belong to Shemar. “He” didn’t have anything to do with Shemar…and then again, “He” didn’t have anything outside of the charity to do
with Fumie either. And that was when the smiles faded. When she realized that the stupid notion of Zori was…not a notion at all. It was more of a
nothing, to be exact… True they’d grown close in the past months.“Close” meaning small conversation whenever she stopped by the gym to have
him sign papers and sharing a couple of laughs in between, but that was it. There would never be more. Why? Because Fumie played the role of the
devoted wife way too well. Through all the lies and the cheating and the bullshit, she would always be Shemar’s… So, the smiles were nice, but
they were all she had. The closest she would ever get to being with Zori were the quiet moments when she pretended that she’d never made the mistake
of Shemar in the first place. She knew it was stupid but she thought about Zori. Fantasized about him. She knew barely anything about this guy outside
of his gym! But she dreamed of herself with him anyway. Of the life they’d have together. Happier children under his watch. Love. A happier home.
And a hell of a better love life that didn’t involve wondering “when would it end” when he was inside of her. Ugh.
Fumie shook her head slowly as she walked into the kitchen, her hand going to the light switch out of habit. She really didn’t need the overhead,
she only wanted a snack before she…
“What the fuck?” she exclaimed, her eyes narrowing as they settled on the half-naked girl standing in her kitchen.
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
Devyn’s free hand covered her mouth, holding in the curse that attempted to escape into the air and completely foul up meeting...his mother.
Mother-fucking-fuckity-fuck-fuck-fuck! Cursing probably wouldn’t have made a shit of difference as she was standing almost naked in her
kitchen, holding a glass from her cabinet about to drink juice that was...fucking...Fuck! She was stuck. She couldn’t make words and for
some reason her feet wouldn’t take the single step it required to put that damn cup on the counter and try to do something with her hands...like
pull the damn shirt down that was barely covering the fact that she wasn’t wearing anything underneath it.
She moved her hand. A small utterance falling from her mouth in the form of a, “Hi...” Hi? Really?! Fucking hi?! Not even a legit fucking
‘Hello’? Oh, God, she had to get her shit together. Willing her feet to move, they did, her cup hitting the counter a little harder than it was
supposed to. Mrs. Kidd would have to forgive her. She was a little thrown. Devyn gave a nervous smile before trying again. She opened her mouth to
make words, but they didn’t come. She closed it again and imagined that she looked a little like a fish out of water! She had to fucking say
something!
“Mrs. Kidd...” Another pause. What?! What could she say that would make this look at least a little better than it did? “I, um...I don’t know
what to say...”
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
What. The fuck. Was THIS? Of all the things that Fumie had experienced in marriage to Shemar, she had to admit. This was the first thing that
had rendered her completely speechless. There was a girl. In her GOT damn kitchen and she was naked from the waist down. Fumie didn't
hesitate to know who THIS belonged to because THIS had "Shemar" written all over it!!! Not that she hadn't expected this, especially on today. It was
just another day for Shemar, in terms of his treatment of his "wife", as Valentine's Day didn't mean shit considering that her husband was only in
love with himself. And apparently he was treating himself QUITE nicely. Fumie cocked her head, a sour chuckle escaping her lips as she slammed her
clutch onto the nearest counter and completely entered the kitchen. Her eyes scanned the length of the bold little bitch. How young WAS she?
Definitely no younger than the rest, Fumie was sure of that. And definitely a change from Shemar's usual as this one wasn't the typical "blasian" he
made arm candy. Hell, for all she knew, he was just trying something new...
Hi... Hi? HI? Did this look or feel like a moment for pleasantries? Fumie was sure it didn't as the girl's shaky greeting only made her add a
nose flare to the list of "affronted facial expressions" she was wearing. So, hos were greeting the wives these days? Like some happy family where
every one agreed with the dirty shit the husband did? Nope. Shit didn't go down like that in the past and it sure wasn't about to start. This wasn't
motherfucking "Sister Wives" and no, it wasn't "share time". Then again, why the hell did Fumie even care? This was Shemar's thing. The usual. Fuck
some little cash hungry bitch, let her get out of line and then let Fumie snatch her right back into her place. But goddamn him if he hadn't gone far
enough to let her roam around in HER KITCHEN! What if Koi had been home!? Thank God he was out for the night as his car wasn't in the garage. Jesus,
What if Eri was, as well? Fumie inhaled sharply, her almond shaped eyes throwing the fiercest of darts.
That was right. MRS. Meaning the bitch that actually ran things in the house. And if this girl could call Fumie by her rightful name and
acknowledge her position, then why couldn't she stop talking, scamper her ass back to the guest house where she and Shemar were doing GOD knows what
and get OUT of Fumie's face!? Without a word, Fumie's hand went up, stopping the girl's words before she could say anymore.
"How about...you say 'nothing'?" Fumie's voice was quiet, but her words struck with the power of a sharp whip. "You don't have SHIT to say that would
make this situation any better so I suggest you keep your damn mouth shut."
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
In her present situation, Devyn wanted nothing more than to shrink to the size of an ant and be stepped on so that she might start her life over and
have this exact moment erased from her memory. The way his mother was looking at her made her want to pass out and as that creepy ass
chuckle fell from her lips, Devyn was sure more of a shitstorm was eminent. She was so fucking stupid! She knew! She fucking knew that anytime she was
in this house she was bound to be caught doing something she wasn’t supposed to be doing. Getting juice in nothing but a t-shirt was that something
this time. Only this time it wasn’t Ipo that caught her--not that that would have been any better--but his mother. Staring at her. As if she were
the slut she felt like at this particular moment...
And for some reason, with all those thoughts floating around in her head, her body decided the natural reaction to this situation was to tell this
woman, ‘hi’. Not hello, not giver her an introduction, no. She told her hi. As if they were friends and Devyn were simply the girl fucking her
son. Hi...she couldn’t fucking believe this. She couldn’t believe she was about to have to explain herself to the mother of the boy she liked and
somehow convince her that she wasn’t as bad as she seemed. This was not how this was supposed to happen! She would admit, Devyn had thought about
being introduced to Koi’s mom formally one day. Not like a dinner or anything special, but maybe they’d be studying in the living room when she
came in and he’d say something like ‘This is my friend Dev’ or something simple that would open her up to make a good first impression. She’d
never imagined this. She’d never imagined standing in front of her, freshly fucked, in nothing but Koi’s t-shirt, waiting for her to
say...absolutely anything....
And she was open to say just about anything, as Devyn failed to start well...but she didn’t know how! She didn’t know what to say and she admitted
it and before she could even properly finish, her hand went up, stopping the words in Devyn’s throat as if by magic. She spoke. ...say
nothing... Oh, God. Devyn closed her eyes to the sound of her voice, listening to her obvious and extremely well placed anger. She should
apologize! Fuck! Why hadn’t she fucking started with that?! Slowly stepping a little closer to the island in the kitchen (mostly to hide her lower
half from view, as pulling at that shirt was doing little to help her), Devyn cleared her throat and tried to speak again, her voice cracking a little
as she began.
“Mrs. Kidd, look, I’m really sorry about...-,” she paused, trying to find a word for what all of this was before she decided there was no need
to search, she could see what it was. Devyn gestured to herself and continued, “...this. I know you’re really upset and I get it. If
I-,” she stopped. She stopped because the look on his mother’s face as Devyn told her she “got it” was an icy enough glare to freeze blood.
What? Oh, God what had she said?
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Maybe Fumie was losing her mind. And considering that every minute that passed, all she could see was red and all she could hear was the sound of her
heart thudding in her ears, that was a very real possibility...but...didn't she tell this girl to not make another sound? What was there to say?
Really. She'd been caught in the kitchen with nothing but a shirt on. And not just any shirt. Oh no, one of KOI'S shirts. Goddamnit, Shemar.
Fumie couldn't help but silently curse him. The blatant disrespect that he showed his own damn flesh and blood was unspeakable. Yes, he treated Fumie
like shit. Fine. But the way he treated his own children? Ridiculous. And that was evident by his constant absence in their lives, the lack of
interest in anything about them that didn't have to do with him and, most recently...the slut wearing nothing but one of her son's shirts. God, Fumie
was so tired of it all. A husband that couldn't do a shittier job of filling his role if he actually tried. Children that hated her because of the
father they barely knew. And this. Coming home to this more times than she honestly wanted to admit. A naked girl, half her age that didn't give more
than a shit about what she was doing to Fumie's family and to her poor excuse for a marriage. And no apology would change that...
Especially not the one Fumie was hearing now. She was "really sorry"? Wow. That made it ten times better. But only because she was REALLY SORRY. Fumie
had to admit, she'd never gotten an apology before. It was kind of new. So new that she literally felt her face slide into an incredulous smile before
the her glare took over again. What was she sorry for? Something that she'd already thought over? Something that still had her in the kitchen,
continuing her explanation of what she was such a fucking whore? Wow...where the hell did Shemar get this one from?
"You don't get shit, honey." Fumie said before the still talking girl could even finish her half-assed, unnecessary apology. "You don't! And all the
other little girls before you didn't either."
"YOU..." Fumie spat, the word sounding like some foul thing that she couldn't WAIT to release from her lips. "...are a slutty, vile thing...in the
middle of my kitchen." Fumie stepped closer as the girl moved behind the island, probably still trying to keep the shirt from rising up over her huge
ass as it was BARELY hiding her!
"And the only thing I want you to do before you get your shit and get the FUCK out of my house...is tell me." Crossing her arms over her chest, she
squared her shoulders, bracing herself for the question she didn't want to ask.
"Where is he? Still in the pool house where he takes all his dirty bitches? Or maybe upstairs? I mean...you're assed out in my kitchen so...fucking
you on our bed isn't too much of a damn over exaggeration, now is it?"
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
She was so angry! Devyn could get being upset about what was happening here, but really? All this? The looks that said if she was close enough to a
knife, Dev would be bleeding? Her words, that did just fine cutting on their own? Devyn winced as she was told she didn’t get shit. She didn’t get
shit and none of the...pause. “What?” Devyn felt her face slip from that look of pained embarrassment to one of obvious confusion. She was in no
position to ask any questions, and she honestly hadn’t meant to, but what the hell did she mean by that shit?! Other girls? Like recently? Surely
she didn’t mean recently...She might have asked but Mrs. Kidd had moved on.
Name calling? This was getting out of hand and Devyn’s mindset was quickly shifting from making a good first impression to keeping her respect. The
fact that she was fucking her son didn’t make Devyn a slut and it certainly didn’t make her vile. She felt her expression go through yet
another change as her head fell to the side and her lips pursed. She was growing impatient and that wasn’t good for what she was trying to do here.
She simply wanted to get out of this kitchen, get her shit, and get out of this house. His mother wanted the same thing it seemed, but first...
Where is he... As his mom spoke and spewed more hate than anyone would ever deem necessary to deal with a half naked teeanger in their
kitchen, Devyn felt the last of her resolve slip through her fingers like water. “Listen,” the word fell from her mouth just as Mrs. Kidd finished
up her little rant, some shit Devyn should have never let her get to. “Despite what you think, I do get why you’re angry. I’ve overstepped a few
boundaries and for that I apologize, but that’s about the last “bitch” I’m going to take.” Devyn was playing with fire. She knew it and
pausing here would only give his mom another chance to speak so she didn’t pause.
“Now, Eri isn’t home and I was told no one else was supposed to be here until at least midnight. I only came down here for a sip of
juice, not to be crucified and humiliated for something I didn’t even plan on doing when I got here-,” she lied. She knew she was going to have
sex with Koi as soon as he asked her over, but his mom didn’t need to hear that. “No disrespect, but maybe you should be talking to the kid about
this and not me.”
She braced herself...
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Again. Again with the damn excuses and explanations that Fumie didn't need or WANT. What was the problem? Did the girl need forgiveness? That HAD to
be why she kept apologizing and explaining herself for no reason. Because Fumie didn't need it. She didn't need to keep hearing the pointless reasons
why this still nameless, moral less girl was in her house in the first place. She knew why. She always knew why as Ray Charles could've see the answer
to that "enigma". Shemar loved the fucking drama. He loved keeping Fumie on her toes with these...games, these constant, blood pressure rising, heart
palpating run-ins with his whores! This wasn't the first time Fumie had had a face to face with a girl who thought she held enough of a special place
in Shemar's life to challenge his wife and the mother of his children for her position. It always ended badly. Oh, for the girl...never for Fumie.
Because despite Shemar's wandering eye and his shitty behavior, putting a ring on any woman's finger had been a one time thing for Shemar Kidd. Hell,
if he could've warned his past self before he'd married Fumie, she was sure he would've "Back to the Future"'d himself a favor and opted out. But
mistakes were made now...on both of their parts. And the fact remained. Fumie Hamada-Kidd would be the one and only Mrs. Kidd. Not that that fact was
anything to smile about. She knew her position...and that was that.
But this stupid, delusional little thing didn't. And that was apparent as she kept talking and...oh, what was this? Little bitch was growing a pair,
huh? Good for her...because throwing her ass out of the house would be so much more satisfying than just asking her to leave. With this in mind,
Fumie's eyebrows raised, a small, dangerous chuckle leaving her lips as she leaned against the counter for more story time. This little heifer better
have hoped that Ipo put away the sharp things before she'd left for the evening...
Eri... Wait. Did she...had she just said her daughter's name?! How the hell did she know Eri's name? And for what seemed like the millionth
time during the conversation, Fumie silently cursed Shemar's name. That dumb bastard had had this girl near her child... Of all the things
that Shemar knew never to cross the line with, that was one. The children would never be in the middle of it. Sure, they knew that things
weren't perfect between she and Shemar...but she'd made a promise a long time ago. The would never be in the middle of it. No messy divorce. No fights
in front of them, even though she was SURE they'd been in earshot. And no, under ANY circumstances, meeting the mistresses. And he'd betrayed her.
Once again. Why she kept trusting him to do the fucking right thing when it came to his children, she would never know.
The rest of the girl's word's were like static in Fumie's ears as she stared, seeing her mouth move and hearing nothing but the beating of her own
angry heart. Her hands shook as she stood upright and clinched them to her sides, willing herself not to reach out and snatch the SHIT out of the
girl.
"How do you...you know Eri?" Fumie whispered as a silence settled between them. She shook her head, her chest heaving as she stepped forward, making
her way to the place where Shemar's lover stood. She didn't know how she was moving and she didn't know what should was doing...but she knew one
thing. She didn't need to get her hands on the girl. God help her, she didn't.
"I asked one thing of him...ONE MOTHER FUCKING THING." Her voice rose as she walked closer, her fingernails digging into her palms. "And that was to
NEVER, EVER let his whores near OUR CHILDREN and...GODDAMN HIM!" She was not going to do it. She was not going to cry in front of Shemar's bitch. She
was NOT. Her shoulders shook as she froze in place, the kitchen shimmering from the tears threatening to spill over in her eyes, the girl standing
before her becoming a blurry haze. Without a word, her arm raised, her finger pointing to the front door.
"YOU NEED TO LEAVE...NOW! I DON'T CARE WHERE YOU GO OR WHAT YOU DO BUT YOU GONE GET YO' ASS UP OUT OF HERE! MOVE!"
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
How did she know Eri? Wasn’t it obvious how she knew Eri? She lived in this house and for most of the last month, Devyn pretty much had too. They
were friends, basically. Sure she was Koi’s little sister, but she was a good kid. Sweet. Smart. She liked Devyn and Dev liked her and it
was...normal...or so Devyn thought. Was it not okay for her to be cool with Eri if she was sleeping with her brother? Truth be told, Eri had a hand in
kicking things off between she and Koi. She obviously approved (probably not of the sex, which Devyn hoped to God she knew nothing about), so what was
her mother’s problem? Mrs. Kidd had to know that Devyn wasn’t Koi’s first and, hell, if she was being honest with herself, she probably
wouldn’t be his last...
She was about to answer her, tell her now she knew Eri. About the time they’d spent together when she wasn’t here “slutting it up” for her
son. Instead was forced to listen to her start yet another over the top rant. What the fuck was her fucking problem!? It was sex. Between two
consenting adults! No one was pregnant and nobody was getting hurt....quite the opposite actually. She had to know that one day her son would start
putting his penis in people! She was shouting now, her voice rising and falling when she got really swept up in her anger. This was fucking out of
control, it was over the top, it was...something else. OH GOD, it was something completely opposite what Devyn had been talking about the entire time
they’d been standing here! Everything clicked the instant she said “our children”. Eri was Koi’s sister, not his kid...They weren’t talking
about Koi...
Now she really did get it. Mrs. Kidd wasn’t upset because Devyn was sleeping with Koi. She thought she was sleeping with Shemar. Fucking
Shemar...He wasn’t even here and he’d still managed to make her feel as dirty as she had the Christmas she met him. FUCK! Fuck him and what
he’d done to this poor, poor woman who wasn’t doing anything but trying to keep her family from falling apart while he fucked it over again and
again. She got that, too...She knew exactly what that looked like because she’d seen it more times than she cared to think about...And then came the
guilt, flooding her entire body and threatening to manifest into tears, because more than any of the thoughts that were currently hitting her all at
once, the loudest was asking if this was what it had been like for her mom. If she’d been this...no. She couldn’t deal with that now, she
couldn’t handle thinking about her mom’s pain and trying to ease Mrs. Kidd’s.
“No. Nonononono. Oh my God, we haven’t been...I didn’t...” She had to spit it the fuck out! “Mrs. Kidd I’m not sleeping with your
husband!”
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
GODDAMN HIM!. Koi felt his body jolt awake, his heart pounding against his chest like he'd been running a fucking marathon. The room was
nearly pitch black, which was pretty expected as he'd fallen asleep around late afternoon. The flat screen on his wall was the only light in the room,
displaying the screensaver on the Blu-Ray player as the movie that he'd been watching with Devyn had gone off long before he went to sleep.
Well...more like the movie that he wasn't watching with Devyn as they'd gotten as far as the opening credits before their movie night
turned into something else. He smirked as he sat up, his bare skin rubbing against the sheets as he ran his hand over his face and then into his
curls, shaking off the feeling of being shaken from his sleep by...damn, he didn't know. A bad dream, he guessed. A bad dream didn't ruin that day.
That was for sure. He didn't know how other people did Valentine's Day. Candy, flowers, and balloons, he guessed. None of that sounded better than how
he'd spent it. Practice after school, a little bud, a little Devyn and the best fuck-coma he'd had in awhile. Goddamn...
He rolled over from his back to his side, stretching his limbs as he felt the space next to him, his fingers searching for something that he wasn't
quite finding. His eyebrows furrowed for a moment as he sat up further in his king-sized bed, reaching further but still touching sheets instead of
the satin of Devyn's skin. Fuck was she? He didn't call out for her though as he looked around the room, his eyes adjusting to the lack of light. He
searched the floor. Her clothes were still there. Her keys were still on his sidetable. The space where she'd been laying was still warm. So, where
the hell was she? Not that he was on his toes to find her. The house was going to be empty the entire night...which was kind of why he'd called her
over in the first place. No interruptions. And they could be as loud as they wanted to be. Devyn had taken FULL advantage of that perk. No, he
just...wanted her. The night wasn't over and if it wasn't too late, they could've gotten in...
Koi's thoughts stopped as he heard...something downstairs. Voices? Okay so babe was downstairs...but who the fuck was she talking to? Ipo'd left hours
ago, before he'd even called Devyn to come over. His fucking father was off somewhere being a dirty bastard, as usual. And Eri was over her
classmate's house at some birthday party or some shit. She hadn't wanted to go but his mom thought it would've been a way to get Eri to be more social
and...
His mom. No. Nope that was impossible. She was off the island all day dealing with Kidd's Kids and she wouldn't be back until much later in
the night. Like MUCH later...right? Or not. Koi heard the voice MUCH more clearly as the pitch rose and there was no way he could mistake it. It was
his mother and...she was fussing. There was NO WAY Koi couldn't tell her fuss. But who was she fussing...
No. NO NO NO! Koi didn't know how he did it but he was out of bed and putting on the first pair of sweats he found in that dark ass room. He
was busting through his bedroom door and nearly tripping down the stairs before he'd fully pulled his pants over his ass, nearly tripping over the
pant legs as he hit the last step.
"MOM!" He shouted over her loud exclamation of "MOVE!". What the FUCK was going on?! Without thinking twice, he slid between his mother and Devyn at
what looked like just the right moment as his mother looked like she was two seconds from taking Devyn by the neck...and then, it didn't take any time
at all to figure out what had just gone down between the two of them. Devyn in only a shirt, standing in the middle of his mother's kitchen. His
mother with mingled tears and death in her eyes...goddamit.
"Moms, hold up. Hold up!" He said, pleading with her as he pushing against her, his arm wrapping around her waist as he tried to stop her from
charging Devyn. "Mom! MOM! HOLD UP! SHE'S WITH ME!"
Devyn couldn’t believe this shit was happening! She couldn’t believe that she had walked into yet another devastatingly awkward situation in
Koi’s house. She couldn’t believe she had again embarrassed herself in front of one of his parents, and she couldn’t fucking believe
that she was again made to feel like what she imagined one of her father’s side pieces might feel like if they had morals...But as bad as she felt
for herself, she felt even worse for Koi’s mom. Here she stood in front of some girl she thought was screwing her husband, listening to her tell her
a bunch of shit about the people in this house, as if she belonged...specifically, her children. Devyn fucked up when she mentioned Eri and she
hadn’t realized it then, because she didn’t know what his mom was thinking, but now that she did...she understood the escalation from annoyance to
rage.
Dev tried to explain herself again now that she knew what the fuck was going on, but that was doing nothing to help. Not that she thought it would.
Why would she believe anything that came out of her mouth? To her, as wrong as she was, Devyn was emeny. She was the vile thing fucking up
her marriage. Devyn telling her that that was not what was happening was nothing if it wasn’t backed up. She got that. But the only way she would be
able to back it up was asleep upstairs. She was completely on her own and as his mom drew closer, it was beginning to look like she was about to get
tossed out, ass out. Or...not.
Devyn heard him before she saw him, but it didn’t take long for Koi to appear, stepping between herself and his mother just as she reached for
Devyn. Talking would only hurt and she was more than ready to let Koi handle this one. She had put a comfortable amount of space between herself and
the Kidds as it was. On the low, she was hoping Koi would tell her to wait upstairs where she could go, get her shit, and get the hell out of this
house.
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
Hold up! She's with me! The second the words came out of his mouth, Koi felt his mother's body tense against him. She stopped thrashing, she
stopped yelling...he could've sworn she stopped breathing. In that second, he knew that she'd understood...and that the reality of everything that had
gone down, even before Koi had gotten to her, had set in. He knew what was coming next. Loosening his grip on her waist, he turned her around, her
back facing the girl she'd falsely accused. He could let her go now and know that she wouldn't make anymore attempts to get at Devyn. Because Devyn
wasn't the enemy. She was far from it.
But motherfuckin' Shemar Kidd. This was his fault. If Koi knew anything to be true, that was it. This shit was all him. Koi had never known a normal
family being the son of an NBA legend. He'd always been the kid of the Greatest Kidd. Greatest Of All Time. He knew families didn't operate
like his, but he knew what normal looked like when it came to parents loving each other. He saw Dhonny's parentals and how they couldn't get enough of
each other. He checked Ipo and the man she'd been married to for as long she'd been working for their family. They were devoted to each other. There
was love there. Normal families didn't look like this. They didn't hit on their son's best friend the second she walked through the door. And
when they caught wind of the girl their son was fucking, they sure the hell didn't think she was one of their husband's many mistresses. Shit WAS NOT
normal. And Shemar was the one to blame...
"It's okay..." He whispered to Fumie, rubbing her arm before he walked to the place where Devyn was taking refuge from his mother. He grabbed her
arms, pulling her towards him as he wrapped her in a hug.
"I'm...I-just...go upstairs. Wait on me..." His lips pecked hers lightly as he let her go, watching her walk away...getting himself ready for the
uncomfortable ass conversation he knew he was about to have with this mother.
She’s with me…The realization of that fact hit her with the force of a hundred trains. The young girl she’d just called many too many
foul things, some of them in the Japanese rant Koi had just ended, was not one of Shemar’s playthings. She was not here for the pleasure of her
husband. She was here…for Koi…Christ! She had been so blind and stupid! She was wearing his shirt; a fact she had noticed, but she
just…she didn’t think…UGH! She wasn’t completely clueless. She knew Koi had…friends. Much like his father, there was a revolving door of
little girls in and out of Koi’s room that he might have thought she didn’t catch wind of, but she did. She knew her son was far from celibate,
but she just never thought…Fuck!
She hated what Shemar was doing to her. HATED. IT. He was turning her into this person, this eternally frustrated, immovably angry person that lashed
out at any and everyone she saw as a threat, even before knowing the true story behind things. And what made everything sting so much more was hearing
her son whisper that this was okay. He may have been upstairs for a majority of it, but what she’d said…what she’d almost done…this was far
from okay. It wasn’t right. It wasn’t fucking normal. This was not how a mother was supposed to behave upon meeting one of her son’s
half naked friends in her kitchen. Sure, the half naked part was an issue that she would have addressed, but never as strongly as she had. She
wasn’t this person…Shemar was turning her into a different breed of the same thing he was. A monster.
Meanwhile, Koi was excusing her behavior. Something he shouldn’t have had to do. Ever. Especially not in front of his friends, although listening to
him stumble over what he wanted to be an apology before asking her to wait upstairs told her something that the unmistakable sound of a kiss only
confirmed. “Friend” probably wasn’t what this particular girl was...She’d fucked up royally.
“Baby…-,” she paused, a sigh on her lips as she took a seat at the island. “I’m…I’m so sorry, Koi. I just…I came in and she was there
and…your father is…But that’s no excuse love.” She stopped again, slowly turning to look at him, her hands reaching for his. “I’m sorry,
baby…”
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
Koi really didn't want to have the discussion that was on the list of "shit to do". He...just didn't. But after the things that had just gone down? It
was inevitable. He and his mother were about to have a sit down entitled "why I thought the girl you're sleeping with was one of your daddy's whores".
No thanks. Koi was ready to completely miss that. This was just one of the things that made him hate his jacked up home life. No one in his circle had
to deal with the type of fucked up situations that he faced every time his parents were involved...until now. He felt guilty as hell about Devyn. She
shouldn't have seen any of that and especially not first hand. Sending her up to his room while he handled things downstairs was the last thing he
wanted to tell her to do, but he did. And hopefully she wouldn't sneak out the front door in sheer embarrassment because had it been Koi? His ass
would've booked as soon as he got the dismiss.
Baby... His mother's soft voice made his head turn, the apology that he didn't want to hear already there. He hated the sound of her even
starting to apologize when nothing was her fault. This was the way she was when it came to his no-good ass father. Any fight, any bad behavior on the
fucker's part and it automatically became Fumie's responsibility to explain it and say that she was "sorry" for it. And even though this time, Koi's
father wasn't directly involved, his hands weren't exactly clean in the matter, either. If he hadn't been such a cheating bastard, Devyn may have
never been mistaken for a "side piece" and the conversation that he and his mother were about to have would've been a completely different one. He'd
be apologizing...not her.
"Mommy." Koi said as she sighed, the childlike name his mother slipping from his mouth as he turned completely to her, his face wearing the
exasperation he felt. He was tired. Tired of him mother's apologies for living a life that no one in that house was content with. No one except
Shemar. He was the only one winning in the situation while the rest of them waded through the embarrassment of having him for a father...and a
husband.
"Mommy, don't apologize." He called her again, shaking his head at her words."Not for this. Sh-Devyn's gonna be alright." He said the words, but then
again, he wasn't so sure. Would it be alright? Would what happened between she and his mother ever fix itself when on their first meeting, shit had
gone so fucking wrong? Koi couldn't answer that. He didn't know how Devyn was feeling about everything, but he could tell by her face that she was
embarrassed as hell. And he knew his mother. She carried a lot of blame.
"Stop..." He said, letting her hold his hand in hers. "I mean it. Stop apologizing. I'm not pissed...I swear." Sighing loudly he shook his head.
She fucked up. She fucked up so bad and it was fucking eating away at her so quickly it scared her. Her heart was beating so fast it felt like it was
going to jump out of her chest and the tears in her eyes that had started for one child had become for another. She had jumped to a conclusion and
been wrong and sadly the consequences weren’t hers to bear for doing that. Once again she’d allowed Shemar to put Koi in the middle of their shit!
Only this time was worse because she had also told a completely--well not completely, as she was still half naked in her kitchen--innocent girl all of
the dysfunction going on within their family. A girl that Fumie felt she could safely bet was Koi’s first real girlfriend...Fuck! She’d
fucked up...
Mommy...Fumie felt herself begin to crumble with the utterance of that simple word. Koi didn’t call her ‘mommy’ often. He did it to
make her feel better after a fight with his father. He did it when he was sick and he needed her. He did it when he wanted something...Tonight he
wasn’t sick and he wasn’t asking for a damn thing and Shemar wasn’t here. Tonight it was what he called her out of pity. Mommy. She
felt the first tear fall down her face and she tried her damndest to hold in a whimper. Her son knew what a sorry excuse she was and he pitied her. It
was a feeling no mother should ever have to experience and here she was, having walked herself into just that. She couldn’t make it worse. She
would not cry about this in front of him. As much as it killed her, as real as the treat of her emotions spilling over grew with each
passing moment, she would NOT give him anymore reason to pity his own mother.
So she would talk through it her mouth uttering a more than necessary apology while her heart hoped he’d accept it. She’d completely embarrassed
him, she knew it. And Fumie’d probably made an even worse first impression on his girlfriend than she had made on her. She was so sorry. She loved
Koi so much and she would never ever hurt him like this on purpose! He had to know. He had to know how bad she felt about the the things she’d said
to that girl. Things she never should have heard, let alone had directed at her. He stopped her, telling her not to apologize. That the girl, Devyn,
would be okay. Would she? Koi had no way of knowing that. She’d said nothing before disappearing upstairs at his request and if Fumie were her,
she’d be putting on her clothes and making her way to the front door. Devyn would probably never speak to Koi again and she’d have to live with
that being her fault forever.
“Well you should be pissed at me Koi. That girl, Devyn...you like her,” she paused, watching his face change at the mention of him seriously
liking anyone. She knew her son and she knew he wasn’t one for relationships. She understood it what with the example she and his father set for
him. “You like her and I might have just messed everything up for you, baby. Please forgive me. I can talk to her if I need to! I’ll fix it
Koi...I can fix this for you, sweets.”
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
Koi meant it when he said it. He was done with hearing his mother's apologies. They unsettled him...made his fucking innards squeamish. Made his blood
boil under his skin, flushing it mad, hot red. Made him...remember every reason why she shouldn't have been apologizing in the first place. He didn't
care what she thought. And he didn't care what she always said when something like this went down. When she missed a basketball game because she and
his Pops had gotten into it again. When she couldn't come home and he had to take care of Eri because his Pops wasn't handling the business that came
with the foundation that had his name on it. Just a lot of excuses for something that she shouldn't have to speak up for...because the real
nigga who should have had his mouth open, explaining the bullshit he caused in their family never did his damn job. His Pops was ridiculous. And what
was more ridiculous was this notion of protecting his damn legacy when the entire thing was falling apart at his feet. Because of shit like this. The
was no fucking legacy.
Shaking his head, he saw the tear slide down his mother's face, tracing the lines of the cheekbones she'd passed down to her only son. That was one of
the things about that saw mirrored back in himself. Everything else was like Shemar. His face and his stature. The voice. The mannerisms...the
behavior. His father could talk a nun out of her holy garments in under a minute and that was a fact. Koi was just like him...and he hated it. He
hated what being the legacy of Shemar fucking Kidd, cleaning up the mess he made even when he wasn't around...drying tears that he didn't even cause.
This wasn't his place. Taking care of his mother because she did the one thing that no one else could do for Koi's father. She loved him. Everything
about him. She loved him so much that she was this empty ass shell that stood before her own son now, embarrassed and apologetic. And all Koi could
see in her face...all he could muster...was gratitude. Because he knew enough and he'd seen enough to never, ever do something like this to anyone
else's mother. Anyone else's daughter... Love was a fucking trap and he'd never fall in it. He didn't do love.
...you like her. That was a dropped bomb in the conversation, for sure. Koi couldn't change the expression on his face quick enough before
his mother saw it as it said everything he didn't want to say at the moment. He did. He liked Devyn. She was...his babe. His homie. She
smoked with him. She held him down when he needed it...she was a good friend. And nothing that his mother did would change that, he knew it. He and
Devyn had been through the worst...and she was still here. And so was he. Nothing fucked up a bond like that.
"I've got Devyn, don't worry." He said, sighing again at his mother's persistence. He didn't want her to fix anything for him. All she did was FIX.
Fix things at his school when he messed up on a daily basis. Fix thing with the police when he got caught running the streets. Fix shit between he and
his Pops when his mouth got too reckless. Fix, fix, fix.
"And stop asking me to forgive you..." His face twisted into a frown as he dropped her hand. "...you already know who's fault this is. Stop
apologizing for him when he should be here to do the shit himself."
Koi could try until her was blue in the face to convince her, but she would never yield to this being anyone’s fault but hers. She should have asked
more questions. A simple ‘Who the fuck are you?’ would have saved her all the shame she was feeling now. But she hadn’t. She hadn’t bothered
to ask the girl anything because she was so sure she was one of Shemar’s fuck toys! And she knew. She fucking knew that this girl wasn’t his
usual. She was thicker, younger, and didn’t have that Asian twist that he had a fucking fetish for. Fuck! All signs pointed to her son right down to
her wearing his t-shirt, but she was so blinded by rage that she just...snapped. She snapped on the poor girl and wouldn’t even stop long enough to
let her explain.
But things would be fine between Koi and his girlfriend. Or at least that’s how he made it seem. I’ve got Devyn, don’t worry. Bus she
did worry. She constantly worried about Koi. Koi and how he was feeling. Koi and his schoolwork. Koi and his behavior... He was just so much like his
father...He always had been. Before Shemar started deserting his family for whatever piece of ass caught his attention that week, he had been Koi’s
everything. His idol, his hero, and his best friend. Sometimes when she watch Koi at games she still saw him as this adorable three year old
in his daddy’s jersey telling everybody ‘lookit me!’ while he dunked into his little Fisher Price hoop. They’d been good once...this
family had been perfect for almost seven years at the start of things and she longed for those days more than anything. The days when Shemar came home
smelling like practice instead of sex and he wasn’t constantly yelling at her about the smallest of things. A time when Shemar couldn’t be blamed
for incidents like these...
“Koi, don’t.” As hard as she tried to keep the truth from him, she knew Koi knew the truth. He wasn’t stupid and now that he was old enough,
he understood what his father was. He understood the relationship between herself and Shemar and he knew things weren’t good. Hell, they
were...well, hell. It was her turn to sigh as he pulled his hand from hers and took a step back. She didn’t like doing this. She didn’t like
defending Shemar to anyone because...because he didn’t deserve it! In some ways, this shit was his fault! He was a horrible husband, an
embarrassment of a father, and if he wasn’t, what she’d done to Devyn, never would have happened. But Koi was his only son...and Shemar was
Koi’s father.
“Don’t make this about your dad, Koi. The mistake was mine. I’m apologizing for myself, not for him,” she stood up then, another sigh on her
lips as she tried to come up with something that wasn’t completely hypocritical and contradictory to say about his father. Fumie reached out for him
again, this time allowing her hand to cup his face as she spoke, “Listen, I know, okay? I get it. But he’s your father...”
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
Don't make this about your dad... Koi's eyes narrowed, his lip curling against his clenched teeth as those words left his mother's mouth. The
same mouth that was just cursing out his best friend on some stupid, crazed assumption that she was fucking his father. An assumption that was based
on the fact that it was highly probable that his mother could've come home to the same scenario and the shit would've been REAL. HOW was this NOT
Shemar Kidd's fault!? It was always Shemar Kidd's fault! People, namely Koi's mother, just had a way of taking the blame and making it otherwise! Koi
knew the truth, though and no one could tell him otherwise. Despite how absentee his father was, his Pops had done his damage and it was long
standing. It'd been around long enough to eat its way into the core of his family and kill them from the inside out. Koi's mother was a fucking mess,
working so much that she barely knew her own children and so damn anal about MORE embarrassment from her slack-off husband that shit like what'd
happened that night played out more than Koi wanted to admit. Eri barely came out of her room when he was home and when he was there, she didn't
acknowledge his presence. And why should she? "Daddy" wasn't even close to her first words. His own son? Well, it was obvious how Koi dealt with his
"daddy issues". But it wasn't Shemar's fault...right?
"Don't make this NOT about him, Mom." Koi snapped back, his angry glare meeting her eyes as her hand touched his face. He closed his eyes against the
contact, his mother's contact doing the opposite of calming him like it was meant to do. He didn't...want to be calmed. He didn't want to be babied
into forgiving someone who'd never asked for forgiveness, nor deserved it. Koi wanted the anger. He wanted to call Shemar that second and give hell.
But he was smart. His Pops wouldn't even pick up when he saw the home number on his caller ID. He'd keep fucking whatever pussy he was in for the
night and ignore the one thing that should've meant more to him than any affair, than any groupie, than any party.
"That's supposed to mean something? He's my 'father'?" Laughing, he pulled his face from her touch, his eyes rolling at her words. "Father" was a
title. A title was something that you had to earn, not something someone gave to you. Like being a "good son". And both he and his fucking "Daddy"
stopped earning their titles a long time ago.
"When he starts acting like my father again...I'll let you know. Until then? You can kill all that 'Daddy' talk."
Fumie tried so hard. She tried so fucking hard to hold everything together and her husband only followed behind her fucking it all over. Fucking his
family over. It pissed her off and it hurt her, but it wasn’t her pain that was killing her. It was this. Her kids having to deal with his shit just
like she did. Koi was so angry with Shemar and no matter what she said or how hard she tried, there seemed to be no changing that. She honestly
couldn’t take blame for that one though. Shemar had dug his own grave with his children, despite Fumie trying her damnedest to be nothing but
positive about him in front of them. Even now, in a situation he could easily be blamed for, she was defending him. Trying to save face for a man that
was fully capable of allowing a bitch to roam her kitchen, freshly fucked, while she drank her got damn apple juice. Fumie had gone off because that
was a completely plausible scenario. She knew it and sadly, Koi knew it too.
So here they were; arguing about this being Shemar’s fault when they both knew it to be true. She wasn’t sure why she did this sometimes. Maybe it
had something to do with having not spoken to her father the way she’d like to since marrying Shemar. Maybe she was quietly hoping that things
would, at the very least, change between her husband and her son if she couldn’t have that change for herself. Maybe she was just too loyal to a man
that deserved nothing from her...Fumie didn’t know but she did it. She fought for the father-son relationship that neither Koi nor Shemar seemed to
want. Because apparently Shemar being his father meant nothing to him. She understood that too. Hell, no one mattered to Shemar, but Shemar and he
made that well known. Still, she cringed as Koi directed her to ‘kill all that Daddy talk’. He was right...but she really didn’t want him to be.
“Baby, please. I-I can’t do this tonight...-,” she was fucking drained. She’d had a long day to begin with, then she’d started drama with
Koi’s girlfriend, now she was being forced to make up good shit about Shemar? Fuck she needed sleep. She gave a weak smile, a peace offering, a
message telling him she didn’t want to fight with him. “Come here-,” she stepped closer to him, her arms enveloping him in a hug before he could
protest. “Tell your girlfriend I’m sorry,” she said quietly. Her lips pecked his forehead before she let him go and started past him. She’d
made it to the archway out of the kitchen before she stopped, looking back at him.
“I love you, Koi.” That was true. Had been since birth and even before. He was her baby no matter how old he got or what kind of shit he got into.
She was trying to make sure he knew that, but a lot of the time...a lot of the time she just felt like she failed him over and over and over again.
I was a heavy heart to carry but, he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms my feet never touched the ground.
Koi was ready for it. He was ready for the "heated discussion" that was brewing in the air around he and his mother as they stood in the kitchen. His
back was tensed, his nostrils flared, his eyes burning with anger he felt for...everything. Everything pissed him off at that moment. The conversation
he was having with his mom. The disappointment his father was continuing to be. The drama that consumed anyone that crossed the threshold of his front
door. He was sick...and fucking tired of it all. He wanted to scream out. Blast his mother out for everything that had happened even though his anger
wasn't just with her. But she was the only thing here. The only one TO yell at. The only one TO scream at. The only one to blame...as usual. And as
usual, Shemar missed it all...leaving his wife and the mother of his fucking offspring to catch all the bullshit that should've been aimed directly at
him. Koi loathed him. If there were more ways to say "hate", he would've said them. If there were more ways to show his mother how...crazy
she was...how stupid she was to take up for a man that had probably never loved her ass in the first place, Koi would've done them. He wanted
to...he needed to do something...anything to stop feeling like he was now. And anything meant fussing the shit out of his mother until he couldn't
make words anymore...
But she couldn't do this tonight... She couldn't do telling her son how correct he was because she KNEW her husband was shit? She couldn't
tell her son that she was divorcing the bastard and taking her fucking life back? She couldn't...No, she WOULDN'T. Because she was tired. Right. Well
Koi was tired as fuck too. Tired of being wrapped up in this bullshit facade of a family and...Naw, fuck that. If she was done. Fine. He'd be
done too. Fuck, he was nearly halfway there. He barely felt it when she pulled him to her, her arms wrapping him in a hug that felt...wrong. She
wasn't comforting him. She was...avoiding him. Like fucking usual. Like she did when she was so numb that she couldn't even... He wouldn't look her in
the eye as she let him go, moving past him to leave the kitchen.
I love you, Koi
"Yeah. I'm sure you do..." He mumbled sarcastically, his back still to her as he flinched at her words. He could feel it...filling him. That
fucking...dread that he always felt when he knew no one heard him. When he knew nothing would change. It started in his stomach, and rose to his
lungs...and then his throat...suffocating him. He couldn't swallow. He couldn't speak. He needed... His jaw clenched at the unfinished statement in
his mind, his arms subconsciously wrapping around himself they way they always did when he felt it happening. When he felt himself breaking...
She felt like complete shit. She hadn’t known. She never knew because Koi never told her. Dhonny did.
His parents found out about their pregnancy scare. Apparently it happened a while ago, but Koi had never said a word to her. Why wouldn’t he tell
her something like that. Even Dhonny thought he had, letting the information slip in a conversation they were having...She couldn’t believe he
hadn’t told her! Why would he keep that from her? Here she was thinking they were cool and she didn’t have shit to worry about with them. Little
did she know he was holding on to this big ass burden by himself. Why didn’t he call her when it happened? She would have been there. She would have
come over and taken that lecture with him...Oh God, his dad.
Devyn knew he had been a complete ass in the matter and she hadn’t been here to keep the kid steady. He didn’t even call her after! She was mad at
him for not telling her. She was mad at herself for not being there. She didn’t talk to him for eight days after the scare and in that time his
parents had piled on him even more about it and it was...stressful. She knew that shit was a strain on him and it wasn’t something he should have
gone through without her...They needed to talk.
That was her first thought and after cutting dinner with Dhonny a little short she drove over. She’d shot him a text to let him know she was coming
back (seeing as she’d only left a few hour ago so he could do his brotrip with Derrick), but he still hadn’t replied. It didn’t matter, this was
important and she needed to see him.
She knocked on his front door and waited...She really couldn’t believe he hadn’t said anything...
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
He'd gotten her text. Right between paying for Derrick's shoes and getting in the car to drop him back off home. But there was absolutely no way Koi
was about to answer anything from Devyn in front of Derrick. And get that discussion started again? No fucking thank you. It'd nearly
elevated into something that Koi was sure they wouldn't have come back from easily. So he let the unanswered text message wait, deciding to deal with
it when he got home, Devyn letting him know she'd meet him there. The silence of the short trip home after dropping Derrick off was heavy, Koi letting
the things that Derrick had said sink in. Things about Devyn and the way he knew Koi really felt about her. Was it that obvious that they were
getting...closer? Koi didn't mind it. He liked the idea of having someone else, outside of Dhonny, know shit about him that other people didn't know.
Like how jacked his family really was. Lying to the damn media was enough. Lying to everyone in his real life? That was something else. But that was
friendship, wasn't it? Not whatever Derrick was trying to turn it into. Koi didn't even want to think about it...but, he had to admit, thoughts were
slipping in faster than he could stop them. Was he letting her in too much? Were they getting TOO close too fast? Was he as fucking whipped as
Derrick said he was?
Pulling up in the driveway circular driveway, he saw Devyn standing at the front door, waiting on him. That...was never a good sign. He took his time
parking and getting out of the car, his eyes on Devyn as he walked to the door.
"Hey, what's up..." He asked, his eyes searching her face, unlocking the door. She looked...worried. A little annoyed. Definitely...annoyed, actually.
And Koi could bet that he was probably the reason why.
Devyn turned as she heard a car in the driveway, his car. Awesome, because she didn’t know what she would do if she had to have this conversation in
front of his parents...although that was kind of what she wanted right? To tell their side of things and apologize for her hand in all this...She
honestly never meant for that shit to happen! A baby was the furthest thing from what either of them needed in their lives right now and they...they
had just been stupid. They’d been stupid and careless and...Jesus, why hadn’t he called her? She had the opportunity to ask now as he approached
her, his eyes meeting hers briefly before he unlocked the door.
“I had dinner with Dhonny-,” not really a response to his question, but the start of her explanation for being here. She followed him into the
house, continuing through the foyer and into the kitchen. Koi went to the fridge as Devyn set her bag on the island. “He told me your parents found
out about the scare…” She let her words trial off. Fuck, she didn’t want to talk about it! She hadn’t wanted to talk about it when it actually
happened and she thought neither of them had talked about it with anyone else in their time out…She was obviously wrong.
“Why wouldn’t you tell me that, babe?” Devyn felt her brows knit together in the confusion she felt when Dhonny told her the first time. She
leaned on the kitchen isle, her eyes searching him for answers. What did he think she would do that was so bad that he was keeping shit from her? Koi
told her pretty much everything. At least things that were kind of a big deal...This was! She didn’t know when they’d started keeping things from
one another…
“I should have been there.”
I'm taking my time.
I'm doing it right.
Self-Love. Self-Care. Selfish.
I had dinner with Dhonny... Oookay? Koi nodded slowly as Devyn followed him into the house, her voice falling silent. He couldn't lie, he
didn't see the significance of her comment. She had dinner with Dhonny. Great, so had he about a week ago. They'd gone to Basil's on the boardwalk and
had a slice. Nothing to write home to mom about. Yet, thinking about what Devyn's comment meant had his brain busy from the front door to the kitchen,
Koi stopping at the fridge for a bottle of water. He felt her eyes on him as he stood in the open door of the refrigerator, looking through the
bottles of water that he'd gone in there for in the first place. And he waited...for what he knew was coming next. Drama, of course...
Scoffing, he closed the fridge door, Devyn's words sinking in. She'd had dinner with Dhonny...and he'd told her about his parents finding the
pregnancy test box. Ah. That was why dinner with Dhonny had been so important. His homie had told her what Koi had told him...not really in confidence
as he'd been in the middle of a ranting fit about Shemar and his nosy ass and it'd just kind of...slipped out. But the point was that Dhonny had
opened his mouth and now Devyn knew. Koi turned around, leaning against the fridge as he looked at Devyn, waiting for her to show him how she was
feeling about something that wasn't even meant to be a serious as she was probably about to make it. Her brow was wrinkled, so she was confused. There
was a slight pout in her lips, so she was kinda hurt. And her arms crossed over her chest as she leaned against the counter, asking him why she
wouldn't tell him.
"Why would I?" He countered, shaking his head in confusion. "It was nothing. No big deal..." His words stopped as he left the fridge and went to the
wine chiller under the counter next to the sink, hoping that that bottle of Grey Goose that his Pops hadn't finished was still in there. He was going
to need something way fucking stronger than water.
"You should've been there? Why?" She should've been there? And why? So both of them could've heard his Pop's mouth run like a loose ass faucet? No. He
would've never wanted her there for that shit. She'd had enough stress those weeks that she'd been going through it, thinking that she and Koi were
knee deep in a shitty situation.
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